Hermione crossed the library to where Harry stood at the window, looking out. It was sunset now, the sun going down in a fiery ball against a sky the shade of blood and amber. In the rosy-bronze light, Harry looked grave and thoughtful, the shadows below his eyes darkened to the color of bruises.
'Harry,' she said. 'How are you feeling?'
'Weird,' he replied, turning to look at her. 'Like someone switched a light on in the back of my head.'
'You look a little different.'
'Great. Am I starting to look like Malfoy all of a sudden? Wouldn't that be ironic.'
'No, you don't look like him. You look…more yourself than you did before, actually, if that makes sense.'
She was conscious of Lupin and Sirius sitting at the desk behind them, too far away to hear what they were saying, but she knew they were studying Harry anxiously. It had taken hours of attempts at getting the spell right before Harry had suddenly clapped his hands to his temple and said, 'Stop. Stop. It's working.' Then he had gotten abruptly to his feet, walked over to the window, and stared out.
'It doesn't make sense, but that's fine,' he said, uncrossing his arms.
He put a finger under her chin and tilted her face up, looking into her eyes. Hermione felt her stomach plummet — it was both pleasant and also frightening to be studied so closely, especially by Harry, who could read her every expression as easily as he could read Parseltongue. 'You want me to tell you where he is,' he said. 'Don't you?'
Hermione said nothing, and Harry removed his hand from her chin.
'Well, I don't know where he is,' he said. 'I can tell you he isn't feeling very well, and I can tell you he's freezing cold, and I can tell you he's thinking about…' and he smiled suddenly, wryly. 'Ginny.
Well, isn't that interesting.'
Hermione winced, only very slightly, but Harry saw it.
He frowned. 'You don't like hearing that, do you?'
She felt a cold tightening in her stomach. It was a familiar feeling, one she had gotten used to over the past few days, an icy sort of twisting. It was odd, she thought, the induced love for Draco that she felt didn't manifest itself in her head or her thoughts, but in her body, knotting her stomach muscles, tightening like a band around her heart. It was constant, as if someone had lodged a cold anchor in her stomach, so constant she had nearly gotten used to it, except for times like these, when it twinged. 'Harry… you know…'
'I know,' he said, and added abruptly, 'and you know, don't you, that if we can't take this spell off you, there's no way that our relationship is going to last?'
Hermione looked at him, appalled. 'But you said — '
'I know what I said. But let's be realistic. I'm not going to spend the rest of my life with someone who is always going to be in love with someone else. I deserve better than that, God, anyone would deserve better than that.'
'Nobody said anything about the rest of your life,' said Hermione, and instantly regretted it. 'I'm sorry,' she said, quickly. 'It's just that,' and her eyes widened, 'you sound like him, like Draco, you sound just like him again…'
'What, and you don't like it?' he shot back, turned, and walked back towards Lupin and Sirius, throwing himself down in an armchair and stretching his legs out. Which, Hermione thought, was how Draco sat. Arggh.
She followed Harry over to the desk, and sat down next to him.
Sirius and Lupin, who had been in whispered conference, turned to look at them.
'Let's do this,' said Harry.
'Right now?' asked Lupin, laying down the papers he had been holding and looking at Harry over his glasses.
'Why not right now?' said Harry flatly. 'You said he was in danger.
He's not going to be in less danger in an hour, or two hours.'
Lupin and Sirius exchanged looks. Hermione knew exactly what they were thinking: Harry's acting oddly, isn't he?
You bet he is, she thought darkly. Harry's harsh words back at the window had shaken her. She knew that when he was linked to Draco, as he had been under the Polyjuice potion, he tended to say things that were unpleasant.
He also tended to say things that were true.
'All right,' said Sirius, coming around the desk to sit by Harry.
'We've worked the second stage of the spell out. It shouldn't be too difficult to do. Remus?' he added, glancing up at Lupin, who appeared to be lost in thought.
'Oh…yes,' said Lupin, slowly gathering up some papers and coming around to Harry's side of the desk. When he took his wand out, Hermione saw to her surprise that his hand was shaking. She wondered if he was worried about Harry, and felt a sudden cold stab of fear at her heart.
He held the wand forward, and put the tip of it to Harry's forehead.
Harry looked up at him with steady green eyes. 'All right,' said Lupin, 'now, Padfoot, you be ready too. Imago moli-' he began, paused, seemed to hesitate, and started again, 'imago moli-'
There was a clatter as the wand tumbled out of Lupin's hand and he suddenly fell back, heavily, against the desk. Harry looked up in alarm. 'Professor, why did you-'
Sirius interrupted him. 'Remus?' He looked at his friend, the flicker of surprise on his face turning quickly into alarm. He set down the book he was holding and came to stand by Lupin, putting a hand on his arm. 'Remus, are you-?'
Lupin raised his head, and looked at Sirius. 'The Change,' he said.
'What, now?'
