weary, irritable expression.
'Its easy to annoy me,' she said. 'Too easy for you. Like pulling the wings off flies. A bit like what you were doing to Harry, back in the cell.'
Now he looked away.
'I figured it was all part of some bigger plan for you,' she went on.
'I could tell you were acting. But you don?t seem to have much of a plan. Unless full-time sulking factors into it somehow.'
'My current plan is to get very drunk and wait to see if Harry decides to kill me. So far I have, but he hasn?t. If that makes sense.'
Ginny understood only part of this diatribe. She made a face.
'Thats your plan? Thats pathetic.'
His eyes sparked again, this time with more energy than he had displayed during the course of their entire interaction. He got to his feet, swaying only very slightly as he did so. He might be drunk, but he didn?t show it the way, for instance, Fred and George did when they crept home after drinking several bottles of Ogdens Old Firewhiskey. He seemed to be articulating his words even more precisely, constraining himself even more tightly than he usually did.
'I?m pathetic?' he said, his voice soft and dangerous. 'I wouldn?t start that competition, Ginny. Not if I was you.' He took another step closer to her, and reached out to touch her hair, winding a loose tendril around his fingers. 'What did you think was going to happen when you saw me, Ginny? Did you think I?d fall into your arms, follow you home like a rescued puppy? Did you think I?d be grateful?' His hand left her hair, and touched her cheek, and shocks ran through her skin like lightning. Up close, she could smell the alcohol he had been drinking, laid over the smell of him that she remembered: spice and leather and smoke from the fire. 'Maybe you have less imagination than I thought.'
She heard her brothers voice in her head. It takes imagination to credit you with having a soul in the first place, Malfoy.
'I don?t understand,' she said. She pulled away from him, from his touch, and turned her back. It was easier when she couldn?t see his face, and she didn?t want him to see the tears in her eyes. 'Are you saying you won?t come with me? I have the Invisibility Cloak — it won?t be dangerous — '
'Dangerous,' he spat. She shuddered, unable to see him she could still visualize the look on his face, his anger. 'Is that what you think this is? Cowardice?'
'Thats what it looks like.'
For a moment he was silent, and she nearly turned around. Then she felt his hands close about her upper arms, and he pulled her back against him. She felt the muscles of his chest and shoulders pressing into her back, and blades ran through her nerves where he touched her. 'Let me tell you something,' he hissed into her ear.
'You don?t know me. You think you do, but you don?t. You don?t understand what I really am.'
'And you do?'
'Damn right I do. I?ve seen it. You?ve heard of the Mirror of Erised?
Well, Slytherins got another mirror just like it. Only this one doesn?t show you what you want. It shows you what you really are.'
He took Ginny by the shoulders, and spun her around in his arms.
She stumbled backwards, and he followed her until she was backed up against the wall, Draco standing over her, still so close to her that she could feel his breath stirring her hair. 'Would you want to see what I really am, Ginny? Is that something you think would interest you?'
She spun around in his arms and met his eyes with her own steady gaze. 'I don?t think it would be that bad.'
He laughed, a laughed that snapped in the middle, as brittle as an icicle. 'You know what I saw in that mirror?'
She shook her head. Her breath had gone out of her, but her eyes begged him. Tell me.
'I saw my family. I looked in that mirror and I saw my father looking back, and his hands were covered in blood and standing behind him were generations of Malfoys, stretching back to Slytherin, who made us what we are, and all their faces were like the faces of devils. And I knew — thats what I am. All those generations of evil have left their stain on me. Even if they aren?t my actions, its in my blood: dark wizardy, murder, necromancy. The blood of innocent people is on my hands. Everything good that I have ever done has been a lie — '
'No!' She placed the palms of her hands flat against his chest, and stared at him, trying desperately to communicate some of the intensity of what she was feeling. 'Thats not true! You?re not responsible for other peoples actions. Just being what you are -
even if you are the Heir of Slytherin — that doesn?t make you evil.'
'It does in my eyes,' said Draco, his voice very bitter. 'It does in Harrys eyes, and Hermiones eyes. It does in the eyes of everyone with eyes. Thats exactly what it makes me.'
Ginny shook her head. 'Its not what you are that matters. Its what you do, what you?ve done. Haven?t you done enough — haven?t you proved you aren?t like your father? Didn?t you stand up to him, didn?t you save Hermiones life, just like Harry would have-'
'Oh, bloody Harry!' he yelled suddenly. He was paper-white with rage, his eyes blazing with a gray and stellar fire that was frightening to see. He so rarely yelled that this was, in fact, alarming as well. 'I?m not Harry! I will never be Harry! If I ever acted like him, it was only because of a spell. Can?t you get that through your head?'
'Listen to me. Every bit of goodness in you does not come from Harry. If you don?t believe yourself, believe me. I can feel evil in people. I felt it in Slytherin when he came into our house. I never felt it from you. You?ve often been a hateful, miserable git, but you were never evil. So you can just…stop. Stop with this whole 'I?m the Dark Prince of Evil' business. Because you aren?t. You?re just a person, Draco Malfoy, just a person like anyone else. And your problem isn?t that you?re evil. Its that you?re scared. You?re always running away. You ran away from the Manor when you thought Harry and the rest of them didn?t trust you any more, and then you ran away from me when I told you to go home. You even ran away from Snape. You kept the sword because it gave you a reason to run away from Harry and Hermione and all the things in your life you can?t face, and then you tried to run away from the darkness it conjured up but you can?t, and all you?re doing is running away from yourself and
