unstoppable force. “Damn straight,” she said. “You two crazy kids go have fun storming the castle. I’ll go schmooze the stars. Damn, was I born for that or
Lewis looked at her helplessly. He couldn’t yell at Cherise, and he had no reason to yell at me. I motioned for the remaining target—Mr. Executive Officer Stick-Up-His-Ass—to back off, but if he saw the signal, he completely ignored it.
“The shipmaster is completely responsible for every soul on board,” he continued, as if he wasn’t facing imminent grievous bodily harm. “I can’t permit this kind of violation of procedures to—”
“Procedures.” Lewis’s voice sounded almost calm, but I had a bad feeling. “Right. According to the papers I signed earlier today, you now work for me, not the cruise line. Are you aware of that?”
From the shock that flickered across the XO’s face, he clearly hadn’t been. He buried that quickly, though. “No, sir.”
“Let me make this absolutely . . . perfectly . . . clear.” I thought at first that I was imagining things, but then I realized that Lewis’s skin had taken on an unearthly hot glow. So had his eyes. He looked about five seconds from detonation. I’d never seen a human do that. I’d rarely even seen a Djinn do it. “That storm out there doesn’t care about laws, or rules, or procedures. It cares about ripping apart everything in its path. And it’s coming for
The XO took a step back. Lewis’s furious glow got brighter, and I saw it reflected in the man’s wide eyes.
Then he saluted, spun on his heel, and marched back up the gangway without another word.
“Dude,” Cherise said in a hushed voice. “That was
“Down, girl,” I said.
“Hey, can I help it that I find radioactive guys sexy?”
We both gazed at Lewis, who despite not having shaved, showered, combed his hair, or changed his clothes in an appallingly long time was undeniably hot, in a lanky, outdoorsy, glowy kind of way. He gave us both an exasperated look and stalked off to organize the Wardens on his own. The glow stayed on him for several seconds as he went out into the lashing rain.
“I’m surprised you didn’t jump all over that,” I said.
“Since when?”
“I’ve got a sense of self-preservation. Okay, granted, it’s still in the original shrink-wrap, but I’ve
Well, I wasn’t doing anything useful standing here worrying. I
Cherise shed her rain slicker, revealing a tight baby-doll T-shirt with, weirdly, a cartoon drawing of a toaster on it, complete with toast. The toaster had some kind of bar on the side with a red glow that looked like an eye.
“Let me guess,” I said, and struggled out of my slicker as well.
She rolled her eyes. “Do you not
“Shut up. It’s borrowed.”
“From who, a homeless person?”
“No, from the Jean Paul Gaultier fall collection.”
She accepted that with a straight face. “Oh, that explains it. Homeless color-blind skank is so hot right now.”
We were jabbering because we were afraid. Because the world was coming to an end, again, and sometimes whistling past the graveyard is literally the only thing that gets you safely through the experience.
And I’m just talking about Fashion Week.
I looked down at my outfit, though, and acknowledged that Cherise did have a point. The white miniskirt was too tight and too short, even by incredibly lax South Beach standards. The top would have been rejected by Frederick’s of Hollywood as too trampy, and by Wal-Mart as too cheap. The shoes were plain battered deck shoes, which at least were a safe choice, if not styling.
“They have shops on board,” Cherise assured me, and patted me kindly on the back.
“Cherise, do you
“Why not? People got to shop. It’s like breathing.” It was to Cherise, anyway. “Okay, fine. I’ll tell myself that it’s a costume party and you came as a drowned rat.”
I smacked her. She pretended it hurt. “Cher,” I said, and put an arm around her shoulders. “I really love you, you know. I don’t know what I’d be right now if I didn’t have you around to keep me sane.”
We weren’t in the serious-talk business, me and Cher, but it seemed like this might be a good moment to make an attempt. She could have laughed it off; I wouldn’t have been upset if she did, because I just needed to say it.
Instead, she fixed those deep blue eyes on me and said, “I don’t know what I’d be without you, either. Probably nothing half as good as I am.” She smiled faintly, and for just a moment, the storm lessened. Her smile was just that powerful. “Love you, too, you skanky, no-style tramp.”
I smacked her again. Moment over.
We went to try to solve the first-class problem.
Chapter Two
The very rich are like everyone else, provided you classify “everyone else” as “spoiled rotten brats with vast incomes and little sense of responsibility.” There are exceptions, of course, but money gets you excused from all kinds of social constraints, just as fame does, and that never does a body good.
We had a whole cadre of spoiled rotten brats holed up, refusing to leave their stash of gold bars, drugs, or folding money—whatever they had stored in the ship’s hold and safe. I wondered how they’d feel using it as life preservers.
The harassed Chief Steward pointed me toward the first-class lounge area, where apparently a lot of our troublemakers had forsaken their magnificently opulent cabins and gathered to jointly declare their displeasure at being inconvenienced. You’d think that
My first brush with the Richie Riches came in the form of a
“I’m telling you, it’s
I suddenly had a great deal more sympathy for the business-suited corporate drones who had no choice but to smile and take it for the paycheck. Once the flood of minions was past, I approached an immaculately white- uniformed steward who stood helplessly at the entrance to the first-class lounge, looking in.