the bus number on the ticket; I knew that. But my hands had been shaking and my eyes hadn’t wanted to focus, and when I finally did manage to read it, it didn’t make sense. Like the words were written in a foreign language I didn’t understand.
I’d gotten lucky that time. I’d missed the bus, but I’d also missed Tony’s goon—if it had been him. I never found out, but I kind of thought not. Even the not-so-bright types Tony employed could hardly have missed me, standing in the middle of the terminal, shaking like a leaf.
I hadn’t had a panic attack in years; had thought I’d outgrown them.
But I guess you don’t really grow out of fear.
The shaking finally lessened, my eyes slipped closed and my head tilted back against the slick wood. I was bone tired, but I knew I wouldn’t sleep. Not like this. But I didn’t really feel like doing anything else, either—except taking a bath, and that was obviously out.
But I really needed one. My body ached, my hair reeked and my skin felt itchy, probably from the dried soap I hadn’t had a chance to wash off. Only it didn’t feel like soap. It felt like somebody was touching me, here and there, brief brushes of sandpapery fingertips as they tested my shields, as they tried to find a way
A hand touched my arm and I screamed, jumping up and hitting my head on the bottom of the counter. I tried to scramble away, but someone had me by the upper arms and I couldn’t break free. I felt another scream building, a keening, desperate cry in the back of my throat, before I finally heard someone calling my name—
And looked up into Marco’s startled black eyes.
I stopped struggling and just breathed for a minute. I wasn’t sure who was more freaked-out—me or him. Finally, he pulled me in, tucking me under a huge arm and rubbing my head in what he probably thought was a gentle way. It felt more like it was going to take off another layer of skin, but I didn’t mind.
“You okay?” he asked cautiously.
I didn’t know how to answer that, because clearly not.
“Sorry about the other bathroom. We were gonna clean up, but we thought you’d sleep till morning.”
I nodded but didn’t look up, because I didn’t have my face under control.
“You’re gonna have to say something,” he said after a moment. “ ’Cause otherwise there’s gonna be phone calls and doctors and all kinds of drama, and I think we’ve had about enough of that for one—”
“My butt hurts,” I blurted out. It was completely inane, but it was true. It also got a chuckle out of Marco.
He’d been squatting beside me, but now he sat down, somehow wedging that huge body between the sink and the tub. He was big and hot, but felt reassuringly solid, too. It was suddenly impossible to believe that anything bad could happen with Marco around.
“You and me both,” he said conversationally. “I think the master chewed most of mine off.”
It took a moment for that to sink in. “He did
Marco laughed, a deep rumbling in that barrel chest. “That’s better. You’ve got some color in your face now.”
“You were lying?” I demanded.
“No, but I like seeing you pissed off. It’s cute.”
I just sat there for a moment because, as usual, I felt like I needed to catch up. “You weren’t lying?”
He shook his head.
“Then Mircea
A nod.
“What on earth for?”
“For giving you drugs.”
It took me a moment to realize what he meant. “Marco, you gave me
“Yeah, but it was the kind with codeine. And it seems Pythias aren’t allowed to take that shit. Or anything that leaves them too groggy to use their power. He said I left you defenseless.”
“That’s ridiculous! I couldn’t have shifted any more tonight, anyway.”
“Yeah, but that ain’t the point.”
“Then what is the point?”
He shrugged. “It’s like I told you: vamps don’t like feeling helpless. And that goes double for masters—and maybe triple for Senate members.”
“That doesn’t make it okay to take it out on you!”
“Maybe not, but I know where he’s coming from.” Marco settled back against the sink, as if prepared to stay there all night. Like he regularly counseled hysterical women in bathrooms. “He’s got you in the most secure place he knows, right? I mean, the Senate’s just upstairs, and they got guards and wards out the butt, plus all the extra ones on the suite here. And he’s got some of his best people protecting you. Hell, he’s got me.”
I smiled a little at that, as I was supposed to. “So what’s the problem?”
“The problem is that it don’t work. Every time he turns around, somebody or something is able to get to you. And it has him scared. And he’s not used to feeling scared. It’s been so long, I’m not even sure he knows what it is.”
“Must be nice,” I muttered.
“I don’t think he’s finding it so nice,” Marco said drily.
I didn’t say anything, because there was nothing
I really hoped that wasn’t because that was all there was to see.
“I’m teaching the new guys how to lose at poker,” Marco said. “Want me to deal you in?”
I shook my head. “I suck at it.”
“Even better. They could use a chance to win some back.”
“So you can take that, too?”
He stood up with the liquid grace all vampires have, which was always surprising on a man of his size. “That’s the plan.”
“I’ll take a rain check,” I told him as he helped me up. But I followed him into the lounge.
Before I moved in, the suite had been used for whales, people with more money than sense who were comped expensive rooms because they lost a hundred times the price at the tables every night. This particular one had been popular because it included a small lounge area off the dining room with a pool table, which the guards had all but confiscated for themselves. They were usually there when they weren’t watching me paint my toenails or something, playing pool or, like now, clustered around a card table.
Marco rejoined the poker game and I passed through into the kitchen. There was no aspirin to be had, because vamps don’t get headaches. There was beer, but the way my head felt, I was already in for it tomorrow, so I left Marco’s Dos Equis alone.
I wandered around a bit, because it was too hot to sleep, and found a sofa-shaped hole in the living room window that was trying to air-condition Nevada. No wonder it was hot. A couple of the guards must have heard me swearing, because they stuck their heads in the door and stared at me for a moment, their fire-lit eyes glowing against the dark.
I went out onto the balcony.
It wasn’t nearly as large as the one on the penthouse upstairs, which had room for a pool, a wet bar and a dozen or so partyers. But I’d managed to squeeze in a lounge chair and a small side table, and had hung a set of wind chimes from the railing. They were tinkling now in the breeze blowing off the desert. It was hot, but marginally better than the slow roast I’d been doing inside.
We were too far up to hear traffic, so it was still eerily quiet. But, then, it always was here. The vamps didn’t need to talk aloud and often no one did for hours, unless I asked them a direct question. I didn’t watch TV much, unless it was in my room, and the one time I’d turned on the radio, several of them put on such pained faces that I’d quickly turned it off.
On a good day, it felt like living in a museum, but not as a visitor. It was more like being one of the exhibits a bunch of silent guards watched in case some bandit makes off with it. Tonight it was slowly driving me crazy.
