“I dreamed about you, saw your face, from the time I was nine or ten. When I got to high school, I talked to Lydia and she told me about reincarnation. I thought she was nuts.
Then, when I described you, she said you looked like my great-aunt Avril. That’s all I needed to hear-l was out of there.
“I dated every girl who’d go out with me, but I couldn’t get interested in any of them. Finally-maybe it was sheer willpower-l stopped dreaming of you. A few months later Grandmother told me she had invited my cousin for a visit. I turned around and there you were.” He framed my face with his hands.
“You looked stunned,” I recalled.
“I was.”
“I still find it strange that Grandmother asked me here.”
“I know that she doesn’t believe in reincarnation,” Matt said. “Still, your resemblance to Avril unnerved her.
Grandmother’s a lot like you-she faces her fears-so she invited you. While we waited for you to come, she seemed so tormented, so obsessed with you, I disliked you before you arrived-at least I thought I did.”
I laid my head on Matt’s shoulder.
“Does Grandmother have any idea what’s going on now?” I asked.
“She knows that Lydia killed Avril, that she shifted her own motive for murdering Avril to Grandmother. Earlier today Sophie and Alex came to the house looking for you with information about redcreep. When I put together what they had learned with what Grandmother had told me the other night, I knew the timeline didn’t work out. Grandmother gave the dose too early-and gave too little. Someone else had a hand in it. We told Grandmother that and she called Lydia. Jamie said his mother had gone to collect some plants at the mill. Which is where you told Sophie and Alex you would be. Sophie was scared, said she had feared all day that something would happen there. I rushed to the mill.
Grandmother called 911.”
He buried his face in my hair. “I know I’ve been tough on you, Megan. I did whatever I could to keep distance between us. It was useless. At the party how do you think I knew you were watching out for Sophie?”
“I must have been pretty obvious.”
“And I was pretty busy watching you and Alex,” he said. “I was so jealous of him I thought I’d explode.”
I laughed, then covered my mouth.
He pulled away my hand and gazed at my mouth, as he had that night. “And then you tried to sell me on Sophie.”
“I didn’t know I had a chance.” I touched the curve of his lips with the tip of my finger.
“Megan, I love you. I will always love you.”
I swallowed hard.
“Scared?” he asked. “Yeah. How about you?”
“Even more than the first time,” he said. “I know what it feels like to lose you.”
Then he bent his head and kissed me.
Sometime after Matt left, Grandmother came in. I had dozed off and wasn’t aware of her until I felt her hand touch my hair, brushing it back from my face.
“You must get well,” she said, her voice shaking. “Megan, you must heal.”
I opened one eye. “Are you telling me what to do again?”
Grandmother stepped back quickly. I tried to catch her hand but couldn’t.
“Sorry. I was just being funny, just making a joke-trying to.”
I struggled to sit up. “You sounded so serious, Grandmother.”
“I was serious. You nearly died.”
We both looked away.
“Thanks for calling emergency,” I told her. “I owe you my life.”
“You owe me nothing.”
I frowned at her. “Because you don’t want me to?
Because that connects us somehow?”
A long uncomfortable silence followed.
I sighed. “It’s going to take a while for us to get used to each other, isn’t it?”
“I am who I am, Megan,” she replied. “I’m old. I can’t change now.”
“Change?” I repeated. “I wasn’t even going to try. Can’t we just stay as we are and get used to each other?”
I saw the small flicker of light in her eyes and the corners of her mouth turn up a little. “That,” she said, “may be feasible.”
A spite what I said about staying the way we were, I changed. I, who have always believed in speaking my mind and made it my mission to uncover the truth, have found myself keeping secrets. Sometimes life is more complicated than the simple rules we make for it.
In the morning that followed my poisoning, Grandmother, Matt, and I agreed to keep silent. Jamie believed his mother had become mentally confused, unintentionally giving me something that made me ill. He came to the hospital to tell us that, even brought the teacup from which I had drunk, so it could be tested and the doctors would know how to treat me. But I had already been diagnosed with an overdose of redcreep. We threw the cup in the trash.
Sophie and Alex came to the hospital together that day. I saw the brightness in Sophie’s eyes, then the delicate chain around her neck.
“That pendant looks familiar,” I said.
She smiled. “Alex bought it for me.”
In the year since, they’ve become the best of friends again, and the best of sweethearts-again.
As for Grandmother, she, too, has changed, though I certainly wouldn’t point it out to her. I suppose it’s hard to keep your life the same when two extra grandsons, my rough-and-tumble brothers, come barreling through on holidays.
Matt’s at Chase College now on a lacrosse scholarship.
I’m applying to colleges in Maryland. And we’re keeping another secret, though maybe not as well as we thought.
Just the other day Jamie stopped me on High Street. “You know,” he said. “I make wedding cakes.”
