thought, trying out the new words. I’d stay the summer and, if she needed me, do my senior year in Wisteria.
“It’s going to get better,” I said aloud.
“It will.”
I turned, startled by Nick’s voice. He stood a foot away from me.
“Didn’t mean to scare you,” he said. “Can we talk?”
“Nick, I’m so sorry. I know how much it must—” He reached out and touched my mouth with the tips of his fingers. “What I meant was — can I talk?”
“Okay.”
We walked together, following the riverbank. After a long silence he said, “I’m trying to put it all in order.”
“Don’t try. Just begin anywhere.”
“Do you know what it was like kissing Holly and looking up to see you?”
“What?”
“You said to begin anywhere.”
But I hadn’t expected that as a beginning, middle, or end.
I felt my cheeks getting warm. “I guess it was pretty embarrassing for both of us,” I said, and walked ahead of him so he wouldn’t see my face. “I know, I just kept staring at you.”
“What were you thinking?”
“I don’t remember.”
“Don’t you start using that line,” he chided.
“Then don’t ask me, Nick.” Did he suspect how I felt?
He caught me and turned me around to face him. I focused on his shirt.
“Okay,” he said quietly, “I’ll tell you what I was thinking. I couldn’t believe that I, who was never going to get hooked, had fallen in love with a girl who didn’t want to date, and she was watching me kiss somebody else.”
I glanced up.
“Your turn, brave girl. What were you thinking?”
“That Holly looked beautiful in your arms and that you didn’t pull away from her the way you had pulled away from me when I kissed you.”
He drew me to him. “I’m not pulling away again,” he said, holding me close.
I hesitated, then put my arms around him. “I thought I had done something stupid.”
“No, you just surprised the heck out of me. I knew before then I was getting hooked on you, but I thought I could handle it. I didn’t know a simple kiss could be like that. It was scary, what I felt. My heart was banging against my ribs. I don’t know how you didn’t hear it.”
“I couldn’t hear it over mine.”
He tilted his head back to smile at me. “I love looking in your eyes,” he said. Then the smiled disappeared and his face grew serious. “I found out right after that what really scary was — someone hurting you, someone trying to kill you.”
“You mean today.”
“No. I was suspicious before. I didn’t think that Nora would hurt you, but I had begun to worry that someone was hiding behind her. The night of the prom I realized how jealous Holly was of you. When I returned to the dance — I don’t know, I must have had a dazed look on my face — she knew something had happened between us. She started cutting you down, saying a lot of nasty stuff. No big deal, I told myself, girls and guys get jealous of each other.”
“I was sure jealous of her,” I said.
“Were you?” he asked, his eyes shining. “You don’t mind if I enjoy that, do you?”
“I feel responsible,” I told him, “as if all of Holly’s life I’ve gotten the attention she wanted.”
“Everyone wants attention, Lauren, and everyone gets jealous. But you didn’t try to get rid of her, did you?”
“No.”
He let me go, then put an arm over my shoulder and started to walk with me.
“The day after the prom you told me about the note that had been left in your car. I could explain it as an anonymous prank, but as I did, I remembered that Holly had left school for a few minutes right after you. It would have been easy for her to put the note in your car while you were in the cemetery.
“And the brick that was thrown at your car, I could explain that, too, but again Holly had gone out during the time it happened. She said she had been at Frank’s picking up some party things. Afterward, Frank pressed me for details about how you were getting along with Holly, Jule, and Nora.
He must have realized then that someone wanted to get you.”
“I–I just don’t understand Frank,” I said. “I knew he loved money and thought you should love it, too. I knew he enjoyed using his clout as a lawyer and businessman, but I didn’t think he’d hurt people. I didn’t think he’d hurt me.”
“Me neither. Maybe Aunt Margaret’s family was right about him. It’s scary to think how easy it is to be fooled.”
“I feel so bad for you and your parents, Nick. Frank is family for you; for me, Holly is. And I don’t know how anyone writes off family.”
“Yeah,” he said, “I think Nora will have a lot of company in the next few months. You and I, Jule and my parents, we’ll all be sitting in Dr. Parker’s office, trying to understand what happened.”
I stopped walking and wrapped my arms tightly around him. “You know, I can hear your heart.”
“Could you hear it breaking when I accused you of getting my cartoon pulled?” he asked.
I held my head back so I could look him directly in the eye.
“I didn’t pull it.”
“You couldn’t have,” he replied, “because I did.”
“You?”
“I was worried about your safety,” he explained, “but I thought if I accused Holly, she would deny everything. The only way I knew to protect you was to stick close to Holly and try to anticipate her next move. After the prom, I had to convince her in a dramatic way that I had turned on you. The cartoon was the only excuse I could think of.”
I dropped my head, resting my forehead against his chest.
“I’m sorry, Lauren. When I accused you, I saw how badly I was hurting you. At the party I noticed Holly talking to jason.
Not long after that he and his friends started harassing you. I couldn’t break it up, not without making Holly suspicious, so I sent Rocky into the water. It was the best I could do.”
I smiled up at him. “It worked.”
“I saw Holly enter the greenhouse twice during the party and wondered what she was doing. After I left that night, I parked in Frank’s driveway and waited a while before sneaking back to investigate. I arrived just as you smashed the window.”
“So there were no phone calls to your house?”
“No. You remember my stupid excuse about why I’d come to the greenhouse — the flashlight, which, as you pointed out, wasn’t on.”
“When you lied like that, I was afraid that you were part of it.”
“You looked so betrayed — it was awful,” he said. “When I left the second time that night, I was terrified at what might happen to you and went directly to the police. I talked to McManus’s deputy. He drove by the house, but everything was quiet. He promised that someone would talk to you the next day, but he wasn’t as worried as I. You hadn’t asked for their help, and there had been a big party. Pranks happen.
“Anyway, this morning, when I learned about the knots and the fact that Nora was missing, I knew the situation was critical. I blamed you in front of Holly to make sure I was in solid with her. After we arrived at school, I made up a sudden errand. I called the police, talked to McManus, and rushed back here to talk to you. He, another
