Ivy smiled. ?Just hanging out.? Ivy walked around the house and found Guy asleep on the porch that faced the pond, lying on a canvas drop cloth, his shirt off, his body turned so that he was on his side, his head resting on his arm. In the evening light, his tanned skin and fair hair looked golden, reminding Ivy of a painting she had seen once of a sleeping angel.
Then she remembered the subject of the painting: a fallen angel, after his battle with heaven. She turned and walked toward the pond.
Fleabag was snoozing in the long grass. Ivy sat on the bank not far from the cat, gazing out at the water, enjoying the pond?s reflection of the fiery sky and dark green trees.
The evening was the first really warm one they?d had on the cape, balmy and sweet?scented, the way summer nights were inland. She waded into the pond.
After the brine of the ocean, the freshwater felt soothing to her skin. Her shorts and halter top were as light as a bathing suit She swam and swam, loving the solitude and peace of the place. When she was tired, she flipped on her back to float.
Tristan, she called to him silently. I do know — I know now, Tristan. ?Hey, are you asleep out there?? Guy shouted to her. Ivy raised her head, then pulled her feet under her and stood up. ?Asleep!? she hollered back. ?You?re the one who was snoring.?
?No way!? He looked around, then pointed. ?I think you must have heard Fleabag.?
?Cats can?t purr that loud,? she teased, and waded toward shore. When she was a few feet from Guy, he said, ?You looked so happy out there.?
?I was. It’s such a great feeling, floating on a pond, a circle of trees around you, the sun sparkling at the tips of your fingers and toes.?
Perhaps it was a reflection off the water. For a moment Guy?s eyes seemed brilliant, the color of Tristan?s ?big blue bowl of sky.? ?Come on in,? Ivy coaxed.
Guy looked down at the water that lapped his ankles and swallowed hard. ?I don?t think I know how to swim.?
Ivy tried to hide her disappointment. If Tristan was in Guy, Guy wouldn?t fear water as calm as a swimming pool?s.
Tristan had eased her beyond her fear by suggesting they take ?a walk? in the school swimming pool. She reached for Guy?s hand. ?Come on. Let’s go for a walk in the pond.?
After a moment of hesitation, Guy took her hand. They walked slowly and quietly together, moving through the liquid gold of the pond. When the water was waist?deep on Guy, Ivy stopped, and ran her ringers across the water?s still surface, sending out plum?colored ripples.
She faced Guy, then scooped up water, pouring handfuls over his shoulders and chest. Reaching higher, she bathed his cheeks and forehead, remembering how Tristan had done that for her. ?You okay?? Guy nodded, then smiled sheepishly.
?We won?t walk any farther. Can you crouch?? she asked. Bending her legs, she lowered herself until the water reached her chin. Guy did the same, moving slowly and steadily, but when the water touched his neck, he instinctively pulled up.
?Easy does it.? She reached for his other hand, holding them both securely in hers. He lowered himself again, until their faces were inches apart.
?Next time I?ll bring a float and give you a real lesson. Today, we?ll just splash around so you can get used to it. Can you put your face in the water??
He tried, then jerked his head back, straightening up quickly. ?This is humiliating. I?I couldn?t breathe. My throat closed up and—?
?Symptoms of panic,? Ivy said calmly, ?which is a rational response after what you?ve been through. Here.? She laid her hands palms up on the surface of the water. ?Hold your breath and rest your face in my hands for a moment,? ?I feel stupid.? ?No one?s watching.?
Guy grimaced but did as she said, laying his face in her wet hands. He did it repeatedly. Ivy lowering her hands a bit each time until his face was immersed.
??Okay,” Guy said. ?I?ve got that down. This time I?ll do it without you…. You don?t think I?m acting too macho, do you?? he added, laughing at himself.
She grinned back at him. ?When your face is in the water, blow out through your nose.? He did the drill several times, then said, ?I bet you?ve never had a student progress this fast. What?s next??
?Going all the way under.? Ivy saw the hesitation and the goose bumps on his arms. ?But let’s just hang out and do that next time.?
?I?ll do it now,? he insisted.
?You have nothing to prove, Guy.?
?I?m going all the way under,? he said.
?When you?re ready—?
?I can handle this!? he told her, and Ivy took a step back. His voice lightened.
?Count for me, okay? See how long I can stay under.? He quickly dropped below the pond?s surface.
Ivy counted aloud, ?One thousand one, one thousand two,? then saw his back convulse and yanked him upward with all her strength. He had swallowed water and was choking — panicking again.
?You?re okay, you?re okay,? she told him. He leaned over, holding his stomach.
He couldn?t stop shaking. ?You?re okay, Guy.? He turned away from her, as if ashamed. She put her arms around him from behind and wouldn?t let go until he stopped trembling.
?It’s. . the darkness,? he said. “Being in the darkness.?
?I should have thought about that,? she replied. ?When Tristan taught me to swim, we were in a clear, well? lit pool.? Guy turned toward her. ?Tristan, the guy who died — taught you to swim?? ?Yes. He loved water.? ?And you were afraid of it,? Guy said. ?Terrified.? Guy reached for Ivy, pulling her to him, holding her roughly, awkwardly in his arms. She could feel his heart pounding against her.
He buried his face in her hair. ?I will never forget you. Ivy,” he whispered. ?If ever I forget you, there will be nothing but darkness left for me.?
?Good,? Dhanya replied. Beth didn?t respond, and both girls, looking up, eyed Ivy?s damp clothes and hair, not missing a detail. ?You were with him, weren?t you,? Beth said, making it sound like an accusation rather than a question.
?I was with Guy. Please use his name.?
?But that?s not his name,? Beth pointed out. ?It’s his name for now!? Ivy replied, and continued on to the kitchen, where she grabbed a handful of cookies and headed upstairs.
That night, Ivy tossed and turned. Well after the others were asleep, she kicked away her sheets and sat up. Her alarm clock read 2:43 a.m.
She and Beth had tied up the curtain on the window between their beds, but there wasn?t a breeze on this unusually warm night. The moon, nearly full, made a bright patch across Beth?s bed. Her sheets were on the floor, her face bathed in perspiration, but she slept soundly.
There is nothing harder than being around others and feeling isolated, Ivy thought. She dropped her feet over the side of the bed, debating whether to grab a beach towel and sit outside. Cht! Cht!
Ivy?s head jerked to the left. Something had struck the window — the glass above the screen.
She held still, staring at the window glass. Then, remembering Beth?s dream, Ivy turned to her. Beth?s eyes moved beneath her lids and her breath was quickshe was dreaming now.
