were dating each other, but then when I was sixteen… I found out I was pregnant.' She saw Beth's head snap around to stare at her, but carefully kept her eyes on the road. 'Tommy Lee and I were scared at first, but after talking it over we decided there was nothing to be scared about. After all, we were in love, and by the time
the baby was born we'd be seventeen and there'd be just a little of our senior year left in high school, and somehow he'd manage to finish, and so would I. So we decided to get married.
'But when we told our parents the news we found that they had other ideas.' Rachel drew a deep breath, but kept carefully unemotional in her recital. 'They talked it over and decided that the best thing to do would be to send me away to have the baby, and so I ended up in Michigan.'
Rachel didn't need to turn her head to know she had captivated Beth's full attention now. She added quietly, 'But they wouldn't tell your daddy where I was.
'Things were much different then, and when the baby was born I had little to say about it. The decision had been made by all four parents that she would be given up for adoption, and she was.
'But I did have a say about one thing. They let me name her, and I quite naturally chose the name your daddy and I had dreamed about for a girl… I named her Beth.'
There was a sharp indrawn breath, but Rachel trained her eyes straight forward and resisted turning to Beth as she continued with her story.
'The decision about giving up the baby 423 caused a tremendous backlash of guilt and remorse. Our parents could never quite face each other again, and it's been years and years since they've talked to each other. And Tommy Lee… he blamed his mama and daddy, and though he's been married to several women, he could never seem to find happiness with any of them. I had a… a good marriage, but my husband and I could never have any children, and that complicated matters between myself and my parents, though it wasn't their fault-they had no way of knowing how things would turn out at the time they made the decision about the adoption.
'Well, it's been a muddle for years. Your daddy and I avoided each other as much as possible until… well, until my husband died. It had been twenty-four years, but when we saw each other again…' Rachel spread her hands and let them fall back to the steering wheel, giving a short helpless smile. 'It might have been easier for all concerned if we hadn't gotten together again, but what we felt for each other was too strong. We could no more have fought it than…' She chanced a peak at Beth and found her sober, listening attentively. 'Well, love is a strange
thing. It always seems to have its own way.'
They approached the turn onto Tommy Lee's property, and Rachel added plaintively, 'It can hurt a lot. But it can heal, too.'
The car came to a halt in the curved drive before the cedar house with its glossy black doors. When the engine stilled, it left an immense silence between the two passengers. The November wind tilted the tips of the trees, and beyond the house the lake was gone again, drained away until spring dictated its return. The oaks now bore rusty leaves, and the hickories had gone to husk. Autumn… with Thanksgiving imminent. If things went right there could be so very, very much to be thankful for.
Rachel looked across at Beth to find her staring at her thumbnails, which were locked together. Beth blinked hard, then looked out her window. When she spoke, her voice was barely above a whisper. 'This was the house you planned, wasn't it?'
Softly Rachel answered, 'Yes, Beth, it was.'
'And he named me Beth, too.'
Rachel wisely remained silent.
'Did you ever see her again-that other 425 Beth?'
'No, but it doesn't matter anymore.'
'Except that she's my half sister.' She turned tear-filled eyes to Rachel, adding, 'And they're my grandparents.'
'I know,' Rachel replied sadly. 'And I'm working on that. I believe, in time, everything will come out right. Your daddy is as stubborn as all the rest of them in his own way. But he's promised to do his best to set things right before our wedding.' Rachel could see she had given Beth a lot to digest in such a brief time. 'Your daddy and I thought you were old enough to know, but he asked me to tell you because… well, he was a little self-conscious about parts of it.' Rachel touched Beth's shoulder. 'Oh, Beth, dear, please try to understand him. He's been through so much pain and he loves you so very, very much.'
The huge, brimming tears spilled onto Beth's cheeks as she tried valiantly not to cry.
'I don't want to take him away from you, don't you see? I want to share him with you, just as he wants to share you with me. You're not the same
Beth we lost, and I would never substitute you for her in my mind, but… but doesn't it seem prophetic that you both have the same name… as if you were given to us as our last chance to have a daughter to love?' Beth's lower lip trembled and she clamped it between her teeth while Rachel appealed tenderly, 'And I would very much like the chance to get to love you, Beth.'
In a sweeping motion Beth threw herself into Rachel's arms. 'Oh, Rachel, I'm… so-so sorry,' she sobbed. 'I didn't know.'
Rachel felt tears sting her own nose and eyes. 'Of course you didn't.'
'More-my mother used to… to say terrible things about how Daddy couldn't forget his `precious teenage lover,` and I that-took her side. I hated you because I thought if it will-wasn't for you… well, you know.'
Beth retreated from Rachel's arms, hung her head, and self-consciously wiped her eyes.
'Yes, I know. You've been very mixed up about where I would fit into your affections, but please believe me-I would never try to take your mother's place. She'll always be your true mother.' Rachel reached up to tip Beth's chin and meet
her tear-filled gaze. 'But you and I 427 could be friends, couldn't we?' Beth swallowed, and her lips quivered as Rachel went on in a softly appealing voice. 'Your daddy made a lot of mistakes along the way, Beth, but all he was really trying to do was be happy. It hurt him terribly to lose his children. He felt guilty and inadequate as a father and as a husband. But now you've brought him the chance to try again.'
Beth swallowed hard and admitted, 'I was such a br-brat.'
Rachel laughed shakily and touched the silky bangs that had gotten messed. 'I wish I could disagree with you, but I'm afraid you had me thinking the same thing for a while.'
'Do you think he'll ever forgive me?'
Rachel smiled and hugged Beth hard, then leaned back to look into her eyes. 'Believe me, there'll be nothing to forgive if you'll only give us your blessing for our wedding Saturday.'
'I'll do more than that. Maybe-was But suddenly she stopped.
Rachel ducked her head as if to peer up into Beth's downturned face. 'Maybe…?was she encouraged.
Beth looked up hopefully. 'Well, I was thinking, maybe I could be your maid of honor, or whatever you call it.'
'My attendant?' Rachel returned, surprised. 'You'd really want to?'
Again Beth shrugged sheepishly. 'I think you deserve it after the hard time I've given you.' Then she dropped her eyes self-consciously. 'You never even told him what I did in your store, did you?'
'What good would it have done? That was something between you and me, and I wanted to try to work it out without having him worry about it.'
Beth looked up, and suddenly a light seemed to brighten her eyes. 'Wait here!' she ordered, and jumped out of the car, then slammed the door and ran toward the house. Puzzled, Rachel did as ordered.
When Beth returned, she stuffed the silver bangle bracelet into Rachel's hands. 'Here. Put it back in the showcase where it belongs.'
'Oh, Beth, it's only worth-was
'No! Take it back and sell it!' Then in a more subdued tone she added, 'I've never been able to make myself wear the dumb thing anyway.'
Rachel tucked the bracelet into her 429 purse. 'Okay, back to the store it goes. And in the future, if you want to argue about your father, what do you say we do it honorably, straight to each other's faces?'
'Argue? But-but…'
'You don't think we're going to live together in one house, three adults-was Rachel considered Beth before amending, 'Well… almost three adults, and never disagree, do you? Your daddy and I have a lot to learn about being
