I’m friend.
“I know you are, Owen, you’re my best friend. That’s not what I meant.”
Only friend.
“You are my only friend. I mean, were my only friend. I mean-you know what I mean. Don’t get jealous on me. What the hell? I’m telling you about the beautiful woman who likes me. I’m middle-aged now, and I didn’t exactly have women swarming me when I was young and virile. Just chill.”
Owen turned away from him and sat down on the beanbag.
“Oh, what, you’re going to pout now? You’re going to give me crap because I suddenly have a human friend? You need to grow up, Owen.”
Without looking back, Owen waved for him to leave.
“No, I’m not going anywhere. Which, I would like to emphasize, is my whole point. Did I abandon you when I was with Melissa? Did I?”
No response.
“No, I didn’t. And you know what, she was insatiable. There were lots of times when I came out here to spend time with you when I could’ve been getting laid like a porn star! Did you see me getting jealous when you ditched me for two years to be with your other monster buddies? Two years! If you’re so goddamn jealous of me having a relationship with my own species, why don’t you go visit them, huh?”
Toby’s shoulders fell. “Aw, shit, Owen, I’m sorry. There’s no excuse for that. It was just mean.”
He stepped toward Owen, who didn’t look back, but let out a menacing growl.
“Don’t do that, Owen. I’m serious.”
The growling got louder. Owen looked back at Toby, teeth bared.
“I’m going to leave while you get yourself sorted out,” Toby said, “but if you think that I haven’t made sacrifices for our friendship, huge ones, then you can fuck off and die.”
He stormed out of the shack. What a horrible, ungrateful friend. Owen should be happy for him, thrilled for him, not all pissy. How dare he show his teeth like that? Toby wanted to walk back in there and kick them out, like he had Brutus’s. Watch Owen spit fangs out onto the floor. He wouldn’t be so inclined to throw a jealous fit after that, would he?
Toby really shouldn’t have made the comment about visiting the other monsters. That was an awful thing to say. Cruel.
But, still, he wasn’t going to beat himself up over it. Owen was the one being unreasonable. Owen was the selfish one who didn’t want to see his friend happy if it meant getting in a few minutes less playtime.
Screw him.
Screw that stupid, selfish, murdering monster.
Toby didn’t need him. What value did he bring to Toby’s life? Some growling and some fucking hand signals? Wow, how could he ever live without that? He might not get to hear Owen’s one-word vocabulary anymore. “Toby.” What a loss.
Toby got madder and madder as he walked away from the shack-the shack that Toby had done most of the work on, thank you very much. It wasn’t an architectural marvel, but it was a shitload better than the filthy cave he was lurking in for two decades, and if Owen didn’t appreciate his efforts, then Toby would just leave him out in the woods to rot. He could sit there and tear apart his beanbag some more and grow old and die and decay right into the wood.
And screw walking away. He was going to march back there and tell that asshole that he was on his own from now on. If he wanted to be a great big jealous baby, he could find himself another best friend, somebody with absolutely no life who had nothing better to do all day long than sit in a shack with an animal.
He went back and pushed open the door. “You know what, Owen, I just want to say-”
Owen rushed toward him.
Then threw his arms around him and gave him a hug.
Toby was still pretty pissed, but he patted the monster’s back as they hugged. “It’s okay. It’s okay, buddy.”
Owen pulled away. I’m sorry, he signed.
“You should be.”
Owen looked so sad that Toby couldn’t help but feel his anger fade away. He tried to keep it-Owen deserved to have Toby furious at him-but he couldn’t.
“Everything’s going to be okay,” Toby assured him. “I’m not going to let a woman come between us. Nobody, no matter who it is, will ever come between us. We’re friends forever.”
Promise?
“Cross my heart. Hope to die. Stick a pitchfork in my eye.”
Stay?
“Of course. I’m not going anywhere, Owen.”
As he walked home, it occurred to him that he hadn’t even considered the idea that Owen might try to rip a big chunk out of his chest. They’d been friends for a long time, but…wow, that could have gone terribly wrong.
And Owen had gone on a rampage before.
Toby needed to remember what he was dealing with here: an animal. Maybe one that was closer to a human than any other creature on the planet, but still, an animal that liked the taste of human flesh.
Perhaps he needed to consider moving Owen back to the cave.
Nah. If anything, he wanted his friend to be closer, now that he’d have less free time to spend walking through the forest.
There was no magical moment.
Toby would’ve expected one. He and Sarah would be sitting on the couch, watching a movie. He’d reach into the popcorn bowl, she’d reach into the popcorn bowl, their buttery fingers would touch, there’d be a jolt of pure romantic electricity, and suddenly they’d be passionately kissing, spilling popcorn everywhere.
Or, after months of angst, Toby would confess all, tearfully explain that he loved her, that he couldn’t live without her, and that if she wasn’t ready that was okay, he’d wait for her. And she’d tearfully say that she was ready, that she’d been ready for a while now, and they’d kiss and cry together and then make love.
It wasn’t like that. For a few months, they just hung out like friends. Not dating-Sarah always paid her own way-and nothing more physical than pats on the arm and good-bye hugs.
And then they were holding hands while walking downtown, window-shopping. They didn’t mention it, didn’t acknowledge any kind of change this might mean in their relationship-it just felt natural to hold hands, and they did it without comment.
Then quick good-bye kisses.
Then quick hello kisses.
But it still felt like friends who just happened to be affectionate. No big deal.
She studied a lot, and during that time Toby hung out with Owen. Sarah and Toby shared secrets-she told him how she’d felt watching her husband die, and he’d told her about the freakish night when some sort of escaped animal slaughtered his girlfriend-but, of course, he could never tell her the whole truth.
More kisses.
Snuggling on the couch during a movie.
She told him that she wasn’t crying over Tom as much these days, but didn’t directly relate it to what may or may not have been a blossoming romance.
She asked him what he did in the woods, and he lied. He just walked through the trees, enjoying the fresh air and solitude, getting exercise, being one with nature.
He took her with him, several times. It was a big forest. Plenty of places to go. She pretended to have a good time, but he called her out on it, and she admitted that she was much more of an indoor person, or at least preferred the outdoors without so many bugs. They laughed and happily found other things to do besides hiking in the forest.
She comforted him every time he got a rejection, which meant that she did a lot of comforting. They joked about killing comic strip editors.
When she wanted to go to an all-weekend bluegrass music festival, they went together. They sang during the drive, as loudly as they could-they loved enduring each other’s vocals, as long as they didn’t torment innocent
