The doctor nodded absently. “Of course, and feel free to relieve your nature into the bushes yonder. All plants here metabolize urine well. If your nature is a bit more on the solid side, well, that is beneficial for the flora too, but please keep it downwind.”
“Father!” BoBo cried plaintively.
Dr. Monsa chuckled. “Oh, and by the way, the amarilla plants, the ones with the broad, soft leaves,” he said as he pointed to a nearby plant that fit his description, “they make excellent toiletry.”
“Father!” BoBo cried again. “Really inappropriate for the table! You lecture us on etiquette?”
The doctor smiled mischievously at his daughter.
“Try leading by example,” she instructed.
D_Light smiled to himself as he walked away. Only an old immortal like the doctor would talk about cleaning oneself with toiletry since everyone nowadays used his or her familiar to do it. Smorgeous’s tongue was not just cosmetic; it possessed the appropriate enzymes to process human waste. Familiars had waste of their own, but they excreted it only where appropriate, and it smelled like cinnamon.
As he left the clearing, D_Light overheard the doctor saying, “Sara’s behavior is an extreme example of poor etiquette. Etiquette. It’s quite simple, really-make your guests feel comfortable. Etiquette is a lost art, I fear, something more in vogue when I was young.”
D_Light was not happy with this at all. He felt as though he were in some disquieting Alice in Wonderland inspired spank game, starring Dr. Monsa as the Mad Hatter. At D_Light’s instruction, Smorgeous watched behind D_Light’s back. That crazed concubine was out here, and he had noticed her slip the fork she had used to stab the product into her blouse before leaving the table.
It was only a minute before he found Lily walking slowly on a trail ahead. He had to run to catch up. As he approached, she looked back with a tear-streaked face. She tensed up as he came near. She was obviously upset, but there was anger in her eyes as well. D_Light wasn’t sure what to say, but he spoke anyway. “So you were designed to be a sex toy for sadistic assholes-so what? Who doesn’t have a little baggage?” D_Light was far from sure that dark humor was what she wanted right now, but it was the first thing that popped into his head.
Lily shook her head and smiled halfheartedly. To D_Light’s surprise, she walked quickly over and embraced him. Her face was warm and wet against his cheek. Soul, she smells good, he thought. He wanted to care for her. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly. He moved his hands up through her hair and gently stroked the back of her neck and head. She was trembling. Despite her toned body, she was soft in his grip. “Help me,” she whispered with a fierce undertone as though she was issuing a command rather than pleading. She then lifted her head back and looked at him with sad, soulful eyes. “I miss my sisters. I don’t have anyone.”
“Your sisters? You mean the-” D_Light was going to say “other campers,” but instead he said, “The others on the reserve?”
She nodded slowly and then said between sobs, “I had Todget, and he was good, and we were…we were doing okay, even happy sometimes, but I left them. We left them all behind.”
D_Light was not exactly sure what she was saying, but he felt the need to comfort her. “I’ll work on this. You know,” D_Light said as he cupped her soft face in his hands and gazed back into her shimmering eyes, “Djoser and Lyra are powerful players. I’ll talk to them and maybe they can help. Maybe they can help you when this is all over.”
She shook her head and sniffed. “I doubt that they will help me. Did you see how they looked at me back there?”
“What do you mean? Lyra was livid! She was-”
“Yes, she was angry that I was made, but that doesn’t mean she wants to help me,” Lily said. “I’m not talking about her anyway, I’m talking about the other one.”
“Djoser? He was just surprised. I mean, we all were. He’s gotta appreciate what you’ve done for the team, how you helped us escape.”
“I just feel wrong. I wish I could be one of you, but that’s impossible. I…” She broke off and sobbed. “I should go. I should go, I think.”
“You can’t keep running.”
Lily smiled sadly. “I was created to run.”
D_Light hugged her tightly and pressed his lips up against her ear to whisper, “Don’t look now, but there’s a squirrel spying on us.”
“Oh Stag, it’s one of those robots,” she whispered. “How embarrassing, to be blubbering and having that silly thing watching me.” Despite her apparent alarm, she laughed. D_Light was glad to hear it.
“I should get back,” he said. “Get back to the dinner. Don’t go running off, though. Can I find you later?”
Lily answered with an ambiguous shrug. As D_Light walked away, he kept looking over his shoulder. He half expected her to run off at any moment, but she just stood there meeting the stare of the squirrel that sat on its haunches on a thick branch of a polka-dot-patterned tree.
Although it had been an excuse to find Lily, D_Light actually did have to urinate, and on his way back he found a secluded thicket into which he could relieve himself. As he stared down at his stream, he half wondered why he bothered with the girl-why, for instance, he felt the need to comfort her when she cried, which was turning out to be a common occurrence. She was no relation of his. She was not even in the Game. And now he learns that she is not even human! But these thoughts were washed out of his mind as her scent, voice, face, and body swept back into his memory. He took a deep breath and let out a low, soft groan.
Master, your bio-chemi signature and thought patterns most closely resemble patterns shown during past early stages of courtship. Examples available upon request.
Yes, Smorgeous could always be counted on to point out the obvious. D_Light knew he had a thing for the girl, or for the product, as it turned out. Smorgeous, upon confirming his suspicion, suggested alternatives to what the computer termed “unproductive dwelling,” including testosterone inhibitors, or since his master currently enjoyed privacy in the hedge, a collection of erotic material.
D_Light refused both options, the former because he did not want his testosterone meddled with, and the latter because he did not have time for that; he needed to get back to the dinner.
CHAPTER 28
“You need not worry about your teammate,” the doctor announced to D_Light as he strolled back to the dinner table. D_Light raised his eyebrows to feign ignorance, but then he realized the charade was pointless. Certainly the squirrel had reported back all the mushy details of D_Light and Lily’s heart-to-heart talk. This suspicion was confirmed by the expressions on the faces of the dinner guests.
“Yeah, it’s a shame about her,” D_Light said as he slid out his chair to sit down. “She is rather clever and has proven valuable in our little game.”
“Yes, your game,” muttered Dr. Monsa. “Your teammates have filled me in on it and hence your purpose in seeing me.” The doctor leaned over the table and looked at D_Light intently. “You are quite right about Lily though. Campers are unique and designed to the highest specifications, and thus it is no surprise to me that she has proven valuable to you. I was quite excited to hear that a camper was on her way to see me, so I have given this whole demon issue some thought.”
Dr. Monsa popped an unusual pink fruit into his mouth and continued, juice dripping down his misshapen chin. “As you know, I have all kinds of exotic products here. Granted, most were born here rather than importing themselves, but nevertheless, she can stay here for a while. Since the inner sanctum is a research zone, I have permits for ‘off purpose’ products, and your camper would not be the only one. However, for the permit to apply, I would need to use her in some research capacity.”
D_Light, despite himself, must have looked startled because the doctor quickly added, “Nothing harmful. Oh, nothing that would hurt it, er, her, in any way, of course.”
BoBo rapped her small knuckles on the table. “Father, assign her as a research assistant to me!”
Curious_Scourge scowled back at her sister. “Why you?”
D_Light raised his hand as though in class and said, “Pardon me, sir, but she is part of our game.”
BoBo, ignoring D_Light’s objection, blinked her eyes innocently at her father and said, “She will be my
