Myth Alliances

We want to hear from him why he thinks we're…'

'Brainwashers,' the officer supplied.

'Right. Thanks… Brainwashers.'

The judge nodded, his color restored. 'A reasonable request. It so happens that he is also enjoying our hospitality. We'll be happy to let you see him.' He turned to the bailiff. 'Go get the other prisoner.'

Vergetta waited. It was sure to be some kind of misunderstanding. What's more, it would be straightened out easily enough once she had a chance to wring this other person's neck.

In a moment, the bailiff had returned, his face as pale as the judge's had been a moment before.

'The prisoner! He's gone!'

SIXTEEN

'Give 'em the old razzle-dazzle!'

— B. FLYNN

Loud clattering on the other side of the door made me jump in my eternal circuit around the cell. This time I was going to knock the guards unconscious and run for it. Very quietly, I lifted the now empty washing pitcher out of the bowl and tiptoed over to flatten myself against the wall next to the door. Slowly it opened and pushed inward. I raised the pitcher.

'There you are, handsome!'

Tananda threw herself into the cell and mashed me against the wall, pressing her lips into mine. 'Mmmph! You must really have missed me, Tiger. Is that for me?'

She plucked the pitcher now hanging unsteadily over our heads from my nerveless fingers.

'Forgive the delay,' Zol smiled, entering in Tananda's whirlwind wake with Bunny.

Behind them trailed a huge Scammie guard, his eyes fixed dreamily on Tananda. His breastplate was slightly twisted to one side, and his tunic was rucked up inside it. I also noted that his hair under his helmet was mussed.

'Things have been a little unsettled in the city. We had a little trouble entering this building. I am very impressed by the magik-dampening field! It certainly did not originate in this dimension, but it serves them well. Such a thing ought to be put into use in the Bazaar at Deva. It would cut down on some of the misunderstandings that occur there every day.'

I smiled at him, mentally noting that if anyone in the future should happen to want to import the same kind of magik-dispeller in use on Scamaroni, I would campaign against it with every ounce of my influence. I'd been taken plenty of times in my day, and though I didn't enjoy it, I'd never change the way the Deveels operated their most impressive establishment. If you weren't savvy enough to shop in the Bazaar, you shouldn't shop in the Bazaar. Taking the challenge out of it was approaching the problem from the wrong angle.

'I'm glad to see you! How did you get in to see me?'

'Oh,' Tananda twinkled, with a grin at the guard, 'I have my ways.'

'I bet you do,' I agreed, a trifle embarrassed, as she and Bunny exchanged sisterly winks.

Only one of Tananda's talents was being a successful Assassin. Another came from a Trollop's natural proclivities, and all I can say is that circumstances have always seemed to prevent me from finding out about them myself. I was grateful they'd managed to get in to see me, but troubled that she had had to do something like that to accomplish it.

'We are ostensibly your legal counsel,' Zol told me, 'but Mistress Tananda has managed to convince our escort to allow us privacy.'

'I'm sorry if you had to… do anything to rescue me,' I stammered, attempting to censor my thought in mid- speech. I think I blushed. Tananda laughed and put her hand on my arm.

'Don't be. It was fun. You won't believe what they can do with those noses.'

'I don't want to know!' I yelped. I glanced past them into the empty hall. 'Where's Gleep?'

'Back on Wuh with Wensley,' Bunny replied. 'He's taken quite a fancy to the Wuhses. They've gotten over being afraid of him, I think. They pet him whenever he asks, they feed him treats, and they never scold him, even when he damages their houses.'

'I'll bet he likes that,' I groaned, wondering if they were undoing years of obedience training with their indulgence. 'I have to get out of here.'

'You bet, Tiger,' Tananda agreed. She turned to the guard. 'Now, give me the key.'

Slowly, the big hand rose and deposited a huge iron key in her hand. She patted him on the cheek.

'Good! Now, go away and count to a thousand, and don't look! I'll come back and find you again later. All right?'

'All right,' the ravished-looking Scammie echoed.

He rotated slowly around and ambled toward the cell door. On the threshold he paused and looked longingly at Tananda. She shook her head and twiddled her fingers at him with a rueful smile. He let out a disappointed sigh, and shuffled off into the hallway.

'How can I get out of here?' I asked. I explained my problem with the judge. 'You can't convince every guard to go count to a thousand.'

'Can't I?' Tananda challenged me.

'No need,' the little gray man interjected. 'Scammies believe anything they are told, so all we have to do is convince them that the person leaving the building is not you.'

'It'd be better if you didn't look like you,' Bunny added, looking me thoughtfully up and down.

'The whole place is magik-proofed,' I informed them. 'They use a lot of magik in this dimension, and it's the only way they can avoid having jailbreaks. No disguise spell will work.'

'No problem,' she stated. She excused herself. In a few minutes she was back with an armload of rags. 'Put these on,' she said, holding out a shapeless skirt and blouse.

'Those are the cleaning lady's clothes,' I observed.

'Good idea,' Tananda grinned at Bunny. 'No one ever notices the staff.'

I was concerned. 'She'll tell someone about the exchange.'

'She's retiring,' Bunny reassured me. 'I gave her enough gold to buy a cottage. She's already on her way out of town. She threw in the bucket and mop for free.'

As my distinguished counsel, Zol was permitted to depart from the building without trouble. The little gray man led Bunny and Tananda out of the prison and down to the street, where they waited at the far end of the bridge for me. All I had to do was potter my way along until I was past the magik barrier, go invisible, and leave this dimension forever—or until the memory of the riot faded away.

I fancied myself a pretty good actor. Once swathed in the cleaner's sorry rags, I bent my spine so all anyone could see was the top of my head scarf, and shoved the pail on its creaking wheels along the hallway with hands wrapped in strips of cloth so the color of my skin wasn't visible. My progress was slow, but I couldn't hurry. I had only been along this hallway once since my incarceration, but it wasn't hard to guess which way was out.

A Scammie with a court badge on his tunic passed me, whistling through his nose as he tossed a big key in the air and caught it. He was heading for my cell door! I continued my amble, picking up the pace as much as I dared. He passed me on the way back, shouting for the guards. My disappearance had been discovered. I ducked my face farther down into my blouse. I had to be careful. Moments later, a small troop hustled past, swords drawn, to investigate my empty cell. They started searching the immediate area, coming up with Tananda's 'friend,' whom they pulled out of the corner where he was hiding.

'Eight hundred ninety-six, eight hundred ninety-seven…'

'Where is he?' the others shouted.

The Scammie looked abashed.

'I dunno,' he muttered.