He nodded manically, feeding off my enthusiasm. 'The most simplistic way to conjure is to seek the power surrounding you, reach out to it and summon whilst channeling the energy. Watch me.'
A pinball of light appeared overhead, bloating to become a small ball of fire. It was the coolest thing I'd ever seen, cooler than seeing purple in the dark or bouncing over walls. Suddenly it was there, like it always had been my whole life. Like falling out a window as a child and not having a scratch on you. Like dropping a full cup of water and it landing right-side-up without spilling a drop. Like making a hole in the Wall without tripping the klaxon. My whole life the strange things that happened around me had been attributed to freaky good luck since I couldn't be a witch. None of it was under my voluntary control, and never did I really gain anything. But now it all lined up in perfect order. The power was in my reach and mine for the taking.
Something pulsed close by, a mini sun of colour and heat that seemed to be nowhere and everywhere. Instinctively I drew from its warmth. It was like turning the faucet of an unexpectedly high-pressured tap. The flow of energy flooded into me, and spilled over the lip of who I was. To save myself drowning or burning up I changed the feeling into a thing. Fire. A ball of flame exploded into existence, hurtling toward us. I watched the self made instrument of my rapidly advancing death in awe.
An urgent sound muttered from Conall cut over the oncoming hiss, and just before impact, the fireball imploded. It left nothing but a ringing in my ears, white spots across my vision and enough heat to singe a few strands of my hair.
Conall's ball of fire hovered mockingly above.
'That was not as good as I thought it'd be,' I said faintly.
Conall's pupils were huge with shock and his pointed ears twitched. His face was stark white. He released the white-knuckled hold on my upper arms and eased himself away. He'd thrown himself at me and lurched into an odd crouch when the fireball was coming our way, ready to drag me out the way if needed.
'Why do you perceive a giant ball of death coming toward you as a good thing?'
I ignored him. 'You call the energy to you then you make it into what you want in your head?'
'In a basic way, yes.' His voice returned to normal and the repressed panic in his eyes ebbed away. 'You must give yourself time to focus on what you want to achieve.' The looked leveled my way was laced with warning. 'The greater the focus the more effective the spell. It comes packing a punch.'
'More of a punch than the fire ball?'
'Yes,' he said wary. 'We will leave further conjuring to another time. Agreed?'
I gave a thumb up. 'Anything else I should know?'
'Our bodies are conductors. We can control as much energy as our body can withstand to channel, never more.'
'I can't get better?'
'You can become proficient so spells are more effective and you can access as much energy as possible but in terms of measurable power, no.'
'How do you know when you're at the limit?'
'Trial and error.' His voice had gone flat and the warning his eyes told me in no uncertain terms should he catch me being silly I'd be in major trouble.
'I'll be careful,' I promised.
The breeze, lightly scented with lavender and periwinkle, caressed my heated skin. I was distracted by a random thought. I plucked at my sleeve behind my back, and decided to just throw it out there.
'Conall, you're a boy.' I burrowed the toe of my boot into the undergrowth. 'Am I nice looking? For a fairy, I mean.'
'You are beautiful.'
'You have to say that because Breandan will hurt you if you upset me.'
'No,' he said softly. 'I admit I take his wishes into consideration when I speak to you, but my thoughts and opinions remain my own.' His eyes roamed my face.
'You have never seen yourself without glamour. And I have.'
I searched his face. I had never been slightly curious about my past. I figured if my family had been willing to give me up they weren't worth my time. My necklace was my only connection to them, and it was the only connection I needed. At least, that was how I felt up until that morning. Learning I was a demon had changed a few things. Maybe I needed to re think the whole 'my family suck and I hate them' thing.
'You have?'
'When you were a baby.'
It took a while for me to be able to speak. 'You knew me?' I asked. 'I mean, you know me?'
His face had clouded, voice lowered. 'Yes.'
'I get the feeling you don't want to talk about it.'
'Yes.'
'Okay then,' I said slowly. It would do no good to push him. Besides, I was in no hurry to find out, and I was not sure if I was ready to hear what he might say. 'Another time then. So, this glamour thing, I need to focus on nothing but stripping it away, right?'
'The spell was broken the first time you tapped into your nature. I'm sure of this. Breandan told me what happened this morning.' The uncomfortable moment had passed, and his lips curved. 'I have never heard of a fairy fainting before.'
I gaped at him in horror. 'He did not tell you that. I did not faint. I did not!'
'Of course.' His voice was serious, but the smile was still there. 'Remove your glamour.'
I just loved how he said it like I already knew how. No pressure or anything. Taking a deep breath I cleared my mind. Emptying my head of the confusion over Devlin took moments and was easy. Clearing out thoughts of Breandan was hard. Memories of his hands on my body, lips on my skin were electrifying. The eyes that turned me inside out, and the smiles that dazzled took considerably longer to purge. Confusingly, the thoughts of my vampire-boy were also hard to shake. Tomas's face kept popping into view every time I managed to get the thoughts of Breandan under some kind of control.
Achieving oneness I relaxed into a trance, and for time unknown I simply, was. As my consciousness floated I noticed a pulsing deep within me. I strained to touch it. Each time I thought I had a hold it slipped through my fingers. I tried again, and again, and began to feel sad; the pulsing glow looked beautiful and special. I had drawn from the Source easy enough before, why was it causing me trouble now? I reached and wished it in my palm, pleading meekly. Nothing. Oh for gods sake! The glow zapped into me and overflowed from my body to spill my aura into the air. A feeling of bliss trilled inside me as layers of the lie tore one by one. My true self clawed its way out.
A drowning woman breaching the surface, gasping for air, my nature broke free of containment and ran riot through my body in a frenzied burst.
My first urge was to run to a presence far to the north. A siren song my entire being hummed with wanting. So strong was the call, I teetered on my toes and forcibly pulled myself back to straight. I became conscious to the why the presence felt familiar. Breandan. Unable to make it go away, I ignored the need and focused on everything else.
I moved, and my skin stung as if a layer had been stripped with a knife. There was a heavy pressure at the bottom of my spine, and something soft thumped hard at my back, pressing against my top. A larger, burning pain gripped my shoulders in a vice until my back arched. Stifled, my back was stifled. Stomach muscles clenching my whole body quivered under the pain centering between my shoulder blades. The fabric of my top gave way and I surged forward at the force of the thrust from behind me. The pain in my shoulders was gone, but the awareness of more was overwhelming. Craning my head to look round my body followed until I was doing a crazy spin.
'Wings,' I choked as the golden tips extended to flutter into my line of sight. I blinked at my own voice, a resonating sound of chinking crystals. That was me talking?
Conall was beside me, holding me up. 'Pull yourself together,' he said.
I held onto the sound of his voice, held on to his stern command. If he had molly-cuddled me, I'd have curled into a ball and cried. His matter of fact outlook kept me grounded. I tried to block out everything but that close to me. My body responded immediately and every sensation collapsed on itself.
'Oh,' I gasped and took another steadying breath.
Conall took out a knife, grabbed my shoulder and with a swift jerk cut a hole in my jeans. Slipping his
