were all smashed in.
“We’ve been attacked by martians,” I said.
By the time I turned around to look at her, she was gone, marching down the road in her high heels. I galloped after her.
“Jesus, don’t worry about the car,” I said.
She was walking fast, like she was on springs, looking straight ahead of her. I had a hell of a time keeping up.
“I couldn’t care less about that hunk of tin!” she said. “It isn’t that…”
“There’s no problem… We can’t have more than a couple of miles to go. It’ll do us good…”
“I’m thinking about Sonia,” she went on. “You remember Sonia…?”
“Yeah… you mean your girlfriend?”
“Yes, right. Don’t you think she’s lucky, my girlfriend? Don’t you think that SHE can afford to SMILE?”
“Shit, Betty, don’t start that again.”
“You see,” she went on. “Sonia and me were waitresses in the same place before I came here. We did the same job-polish the glasses, serve, sweep. At night we sat around together in our apartments and talked about what life would be like once we got out of there. Tonight I saw how she’s done since then. I think she’s found herself a nice little place in the sun…”
You could see the motel lights in the distance. We weren’t out of the woods yet, and the downward slope was getting slippery.
“You don’t agree?” she insisted.
I told myself, just keep walking, don’t pay attention to what she says-in a second she’ll forget all about it.
“Explain to me why I’m always in the same rut. Tell me what I do wrong that keeps me from climbing up the ladder a little…”
I stopped to light a cigarette and she waited for me. Her eyes went through me. I sort of shrugged, as if to say, “Search me.”
“We’ll never get a break if we stick around here,” she said.
I looked over her shoulder. She was breathing quickly.
“I don’t know…” I said.
“What do you mean you don’t know? What kind of answer is that?”
“Shit, it means I don’t know!”
To put an end to the scene, I took a few steps off the shoulder of the road and pissed. I turned my back to her. I thought I’d gotten her to button her lip. I made a little blue cloud of steam in the night, thinking that, sure, living with a woman always has its inconveniences, but in the end the scale always tips in favor of doing it. Let her bitch all she wants, I thought, it doesn’t really bother me. It’s a small price to pay for all the good things I get from her. I felt her boiling over behind me. I couldn’t remember how long it had been since I really had someone by my side. It had been a long time.
I zipped my pants up, feeling good. That`s how it is when you take up with a high-spirited girl-yon can’t avoid a few hot moments, no way around it. The alcohol made my blood warm. I pivoted around on one leg to face her.
“I don’t feel like discussing this anymore,” I said. “I’m not up to it. Be a pal…”
She looked at the black sky, sighing:
“But God, don’t you ever think that life is passing us by, right under our noses? Doesn’t that just get to you sometimes?”
“Listen: Ever since I’ve been with you I don’t feel like life is passing me by. I even feel like I have more than my share, if you really want to know…”
“Oh shit, I’m not talking about that! I mean let’s get out of this together! Somewhere opportunity is knocking at the door. We just have to find where…”
“Too simple. A mistake.”
“God, you’d think you’d found paradise here in this crummy desert. You must be half nuts.”
I had decided not to answer. I stepped toward her, but unfortunately got my foot stuck in a hole and fell flat on my face. I hurt my knee. It was obviously a detail that didn’t bother her. She kept at me about her rage to live in the fast lane while I was busy crawling behind her in the dust.
“Take Sonia. Look how she made out. Now she can really live! Imagine what we could do if we just got off our butts and…”
“Betty, for Christ sakes…!”
“I can’t understand why you don’t feel suffocated here. There’s nothing happening-nothing that’s
“Come here and help me, goddammit. Come…”
But I could see she wasn’t listening. She hadn’t budged an inch. She was totally locked into her fantasy by then-breath short and eyes shining.
“Don’t you ever see yourself taking off for the islands one of these mornings?” She added. “One of these days, just setting sail for paradise?”
“Let’s get home and go to bed,” I said.
She fixed her eyes on me:
“All we have to do is stir things up a little! All we have to do is
“And what do you hope to accomplish, exactly? What do you think is going to-”
“God, can you imagine what it’s like on the islands?”
The vision of it had set her brain on fire. She let out a little nervous giggle, then took off without me, juggling her sugar-plum daydreams while I barely managed to get up on my knees.
“SHIT…” I yelled after her. “YOU KNOW WHAT YOU CAN DO WITH YOUR ISLANDS!?”
3
For the next few days, we didn’t talk about it. We were over our heads in work. I’d never seen so much all at one time. A fucking cyclone hit us. So many things were torn up that after a while you gave up counting. Windows broken into a thousand pieces, all kinds of crap scattered in the alleys. Looking at a disaster this size, all we could do was shake our heads and stare at each other. George scratched his head and grimaced. Betty just sort of laughed.
I spent all my days running from one bungalow to another with my toolbox, a pencil behind my ear. Betty made the trip back and forth into town, getting me boxes of nails, cans of putty, lumber, and tanning lotion. I spent most of my time outside-up on a ladder or on someone’s roof. From morning till night the sky stayed limpid blue, rained out once and for all. I passed hours and hours in the sunlight, a handful of nails in my mouth, fixing all those little houses that were falling apart.
George was useless-it was even dangerous to work with him. He was always letting the hammer get away from him or sawing your hand off while you were holding the board. After working with him one morning, I asked him to just take care of the alleys-to stay away from my ladder or I’d clump my toolbox on his head.
Little by little the place started looking habitable again. I was lost in the ozone every night. It was especially tough to fix the TV antennas-bending the wire back while holding onto the cables at the same time. I didn’t want Betty climbing on the roofs, I didn’t want anything to happen to her. From time to time I’d see her head pop up on top of the ladder with a cool beer. The heat had me totally wasted-I saw lightning in her hair. I would lean over, roll my tongue in her mouth, and grab the bottle. It helped me make it to the end of the day. Then I would put my tools away and go eat, strolling under the caress of the sun till I reached the house and found her there, lying under the porch with my fan. She would always ask me the same questions:
“You doing okay? Not too tired?”
“So-so…”
