“No. I'm only good from one side, and it isn't this one.”
“For what you've just said, I ought to give you a child.”
She laughed, but quickly added. “Will you give it to me in the month?”
Since my temperament is about equally foreign to the spirits of sadism and Presbyterian morality, the two that seem to share the greater part of society about equally, what I am going to say is only the expression of a personal feeling and will probably offend everyone: I took as much pleasure in screwing Lili, who wished it with all her heart, as I would have felt displeasure and guilt in taking a young girl against her will. I might add that I have never yet been guilty of rape.
She played at fucking like most other little girls play at dolls, taking a certain instinctive satisfaction from it. And even though she had long done this, even though it was certainly no new thing for her, she was very proud to be able to tempt a man, to be able to do all at her age that her mother could do… But after a minute or so she said softly to me, “Change holes. You'll he able to go further.”
Quickly she jumped from the bed, ran to the toilet, lathered up some soap in order to open the passage and, returning to me, squatted down on top of my rod, her eyes always on mine. A couple of seconds prodding and squirming was all that she needed, and 'she entirely swallowed from the rear the pole she had barely been able to insert the head of from the front. And she took it all, right to the root! With her little buttocks on my testicles, she drew up her knees, and spread her thighs, so that she was squatting there like a little devil on a Saint Anthony. Then she spread the lips of her smooth red sex and began to beat herself off with her finger like a little girl in the privacy of a toilet.
I took her into my arms, but she was so small that even by lowering my head I could only reach her hair.
“You know, I'm really happy! When I think that you just slept with mama and that you can get a hard-on for me all by yourself… Even when my mother is go beautiful and I'm so ugly. I never get a chance to go with young men. Mother takes them all. I have to take the old ones. And you can drive it so far into my ass! So far! All the way to my heart!”
I don't think I have ever heard more tender or nicer words than those. But again, very few will understand my feeling. The moralist will blame me for having victimized a young girl in an act of sodomy, and the madmen will not be able to understand taking pleasure in a child without striking or whipping her so that she's crying and screaming like a pig having its throat cut.
Lili was motionless for a few moments and then turned softly on the pivot in her behind and laid on me on her back, her head down by my feet. And when I put one hand between her legs, her face took on an expression as if she were praying silently, until I suddenly took the initiative and said, “Your mouth now.”
“Ah!” she cried.
And then, as soon as I had said that… But should I tell this too? I really feel quite embarrassed, but I swore to tell everything, just as I lived it…
Lili withdrew the member from her behind, the game that had been working it for fifteen minutes, and put it in her mouth exactly as it was.
“Oh, you dirty little devil!” I cried, pulling it out.
“It's too late. I did it already.”
“How can you…”
“I like it like that.”
The sentence, “I like it like that,” didn't admit to a reply, and Lili took my penis again, pretending to want to bite it rather than have to give it up, and began to suck it, greedily, hungrily, in an orgy of delight.
Knowing well the reproaches and compliments that had been hers on other beds before, she had warned me that this last exercise was not what she did the best. However, I was becoming a little tired from the long state of excitement she had held me in and, holding the great opening of “her little ass, which she had turned over to my care with my right hand, I warned her to be ready.
If the comparison is not irreverent, I would like to say that a little girl who likes to suck men is like a child on her knees in front of the holy altar at her first communion. She seems to be awaiting some sacred nourishment 'from the bosom of an incomprehensible mystery, something the Cod of Love is going to give her.
But Lili had so touching an expression on her face that, it would have been cruel to have laughed. She raised her eyes to the heavens and stretched her tiny mouth as well as she could over the cock that seemed so enormous and out of proportion by comparison. And when she felt me suddenly ejaculate, she breathed little clucks and gurgles through her nose. I don't know why, that struck me as irresistibly comic. I finally had to hide my eyes behind my hand.
The whole thing lasted no more than a second. Lili wasn't one of those little girls who throw up everything they take in and leave more regret than remorse in the men who have perverted them.
She sucked badly, but she swallowed well.
IV
Four hours slid by, and I was dining in a little restaurant by myself, alone without women, trying to recover first of all my strength and most of all my spirits.
The first was easy, the latter not so.
And when I returned to my apartment around eleven o'clock I was still having a little difficulty understanding exactly what had happened.
I had just acquired for a neighbor a beautiful Italian woman who sold her daughters. That I should have taken one of them was nothing extraordinary. Students and girls of fourteen have been sleeping together since antiquity. That the mother, a woman used to sharing lovers with her daughters, should have rung at my door soon after was also perfectly normal. But why had she sent Lili to me? And why had she promised that the other would…
There was a knock. It was repeated… I went to open the door and a voice at once both soft and mild said, “It seems that it's my turn now.”
I was stunned. Teresa had warned me that Charlotte was the most beautiful of her three daughters, but I had never hoped or thought that she was that good. And I said it to her face.
“My God, but you're beautiful!”
“Please don't say that,” she said sadly. “It'«worthy of any woman.”
“Are you Charlotte?”
“Yes. Do you like me?”
“Do I like you!”
She interrupted me to say, with a sort of relief and lassitude, “That's good because I can only give myself like I am… I'm not going to play the coquette, and… and…”
“And we kiss?”
“As often as you want.”
I took her mouth passionately. The kiss that she gave was soft rather than tender, but there was a welcome in it. Only when I put my hand beneath her skirts did she say, “Let me undress.”
“I don't know if I have enough time.”
“You've got all night.”
And unhurriedly, with all the simplicity of a model taking off her clothes before a painter, she removed her black dress, her stockings, her slip, and, nude before me, sighed, “You can see that I'm just like all the rest.”
The only word to describe her is delicious. A little less dark-skinned than her mother, but with the same black hair, she had a wonderfully soft figure, and, in fact, everything about her was of a quiet softness: her look, her voice, her skin, her caress.
When she was on my bed and in my arms she murmured almost humbly into my ear, “I want to make you happy… Just ask me to do whatever you want, however you want it.”
This time, an overwhelming desire seized me to possess this girl in the most natural and normal of all ways, and I told her, in such a way, I thought, as not to leave any doubt as to my wishes, that I loved her and that I only
