The Golden Spiders (Crime Line)

The address of my second customer, on Gramercy Park, proved to be an old yellow brick apartment house with a uniformed doorman, a spacious lobby with fine old rugs, and an elevator with a bad attack of asthma. It finally got the chauffeur and me to the eighth floor, after the doorman had phoned up and passed me. When I pushed the button at the door of 8B it was opened by a female master sergeant dressed like a maid, who admitted me, took my hat, and directed me to an archway at the end of the hall.

It was a large high-ceilinged living room, more than fully furnished, the dominant colors of its drapes and upholstery and rugs being yellow, violet, light green, and maroon-at least that was the impression gained from a glance around. A touch of black was supplied by the dress of the woman who moved to meet me as I approached. The black was becoming to her, with her ash-blond hair gathered into a bun at the back, her clear blue eyes, and her pale carefully tended skin. She didn’t offer a hand, but her expression was not hostile.

“Mrs. Horan?” I inquired.

She nodded. “My husband will be furious at me for seeing you, but I was simply too curious. Of course I should be sure-you are the Archie Goodwin that works for Nero Wolfe?”

I got a card from my wallet and handed it to her, and she held it at an angle for better light. Then she widened her eyes at me. “But I don’t-’To discuss what Mrs. Fromm told Mr. Wolfe’? With me? Why with me?”

“Because you’re Mrs. Dennis Horan.”

“Yes, I am, of course.” Her tone implied that that angle hadn’t occurred to her. “My husband will be furious!”

I glanced over my shoulder. “Perhaps we might sit over by a window? This is rather private.”

“Certainly.” She turned and found a way among pieces of furniture, and I followed. She took a chair at the far end near a window, and I moved one over close enough to make it cozy.

“You know,” she said, “this is the most dreadful thing. The most dreadful. Laura Fromm was such a fine person.” She might have used the same tone and expression to tell me she liked the way I had my hair cut. She added, “Did you know her well?”

“No, I saw her only once, last Friday when she came to consult Mr. Wolfe.”

“He’s a detective, isn’t he?”

“That’s right.”

“Are you a detective too?”

“Yes, I work for Mr. Wolfe.”

“It’s simply fascinating. Of course there have been two men here asking questions-no, three-and Saturday more of them at the District Attorney’s office, but they’re really only policemen. You’re truly a detective. I would never have thought a detective would be so-would dress so well.” She made a pretty little gesture. “But here I am babbling along as usual, and you want to discuss something with me, don’t you?”

“That was the idea. What Mrs. Fromm said to Mr. Wolfe.”

“Then you’ll have to tell me what she said. I can’t discuss it until I know what it was. Can I?”

“No,” I conceded, “but I can’t tell you until I know how much you want to hear it.”

“Oh, I do want to hear it!”

“Good. I thought you would. You see, Mrs. Horan, I was in the room all the time Mrs. Fromm and Mr. Wolfe were talking, and I remember every word they said. That’s why I thought you would be extremely curious about it, so I’m not surprised that you are. The trouble is, I can’t afford to satisfy your curiosity as a gift. I should have explained, I’m not here representing Nero Wolfe, that’s why I said it’s rather private. I’m representing just myself. I’ll satisfy your curiosity if you’ll lend me five thousand dollars to be repaid the day it rains up instead of down.”

The only visible reaction was that the blue eyes widened a little. “That’s an amusing idea,” she said, “raining up instead of down. Would it be raining from the clouds up, or up from the ground to the clouds?”

“Either way would do.”

“I like it better up from the ground.” A pause. “What did you say about lending you some money? I beg your pardon, but my mind got onto the raining up.”

I was ready to admit she was too much for me, but I struggled on. I abandoned the rain. “If you’ll pay me five thousand dollars I’ll tell you what Mrs. Fromm told Mr. Wolfe. Cash in advance.”

Her eyes widened. “Was that what you said? I guess I didn’t understand.”

“I made it fancy by dragging in the rain. Sorry. It’s better that way, plain.”

She shook her pretty head. “It’s not better for me, Mr. Goodwin. It sounds absolutely crazy, unless- oh, I see! You mean she told him something awful about me! That doesn’t surprise me any, but what was it?”

“I didn’t say she said anything about you. I merely-”

“But of course she did! She would! What was it?”

“No.” I was emphatic. “Maybe I didn’t make it plain enough.” I stuck up a finger. “First you give me money.” Another finger. “Second, I give you facts. I’m offering to sell you something, that’s all.”

She nodded regretfully. “That’s the real trouble.”

“What is?”