people in and out who didn’t really want to be there.
“Be careful,” Shan cautioned me. “There’s probably some bad shit stored up.”
“Yeah, I already thought of that. I’ll focus on keeping the evil memories out.” Gods knew, I had enough of my own.
In a little while, a nurse came in with a bunch of supplies on a tray, vials for blood, and needles, I hoped for pain relief. Fortunately, that was the first thing she did. The shot stung a little, but nothing compared to the agony in my thigh. It was like the hellhound was still chewing on me. I knew that was psychological—if there had been anything magickal about the bite, Booke’s statuette neutralized it. The medicine worked fast, which meant it was the good stuff. By the time Nurse Judy drew my blood, I didn’t even care. Of course, Butch got worried when she stole my life fluids and growled at her. That prompted a whole lot of drama and an angry diatribe about how I should know better than to bring that filthy animal into a hospital room. Shannon apologized on my behalf, as I thought the woman’s face was funny when she yelled and I couldn’t stop giggling.
Shannon finished with, “I’m really sorry. I didn’t think. I’ll take the dog home. I was just worried about my girl. You get that, right?”
The nurse softened. “I understand. And he’s a little guy. He didn’t run around in here, did he?”
“No,” I managed.
Soon after, Shan left with a promise to return as soon as she could, leaving me alone with beeping monitors and my fear.
Dude, This Is Huge
Over the next few days, my life dwindled to what other people were doing to me. I ate when someone told me, slept, woke for various tests, and then went back to sleep. I barely remembered the corrective surgery where they sutured the tears in my thigh, but I sure felt the stitches. Visitors came and went, though they couldn’t bring Butch, much to my dismay. But the nurse was canny after that first time; she insisted on checking purses thereafter.
It was the third day after my arrival at the ER when Dr. Rosales came into the room. I was itching to be released, but from the look on her face she had news for me. Hopefully it wasn’t something dire, like I’d never again walk without a limp. She’d mentioned PT, of course, but not permanent disability. Still, I clicked the mute button on the remote and let her determine her approach.
“From our prior discussion, I’m positive you don’t know . . . but I wanted to be the one to tell you.”
“What?”
“You’re approximately six weeks pregnant. Congratulations.”
I stared, unable to process this newest crisis. Me? A mother? Good gods. Though I managed well enough with Cami, any time I spent with her was influenced by the awareness it would end. My own kid wouldn’t be like that at all, no giving the baby back when it started driving me crazy. Maybe I should’ve been excited, ecstatic even, that part of Chance would live on through me, but cold terror coiled in my stomach instead.
Somehow I managed not to babble the usual denials and incoherent questions, but I think my silence alarmed her. The doctor studied me. “This was an unplanned pregnancy, I take it? I can’t make any recommendations, of course, but just remember that you have a number of options.”
“I know,” I whispered.
But no matter how scared I might be, that wasn’t an option. I ached, thinking about the life Chance and I had created. Gods, I hoped I hadn’t hurt it with all the crazy shit I’d done in the last six weeks. The poison magick spell I’d set off,
“Is the peanut okay? I mean, I’ve had pain meds and there was anesthetic . . .”
“Yes, all your treatments are known to be safe for expectant mothers. No worries on that front, though you do need to take better care of yourself. Rest more, drink plenty of fluids, eat well, take prenatal vitamins, and see your regular practitioner for regular checks.”
“Yes, I will.”
A horrifying thought occurred to me. Not long ago, I’d been in La Rosa Negra with Booke—I searched my brain frantically—but I’d refused alcohol that day because I was driving.
My panic must’ve shown because Dr. Rosales asked, “What’s wrong?”
“I had a few cocktails. Before I knew. Will it hurt the baby? I’m not normally a big drinker—”
“How many is a few?”
“One . . . and part of a second.” I told her what was in the Agave Kiss. Hopefully, I hadn’t hurt the peanut.
“That’s not heavy or binge drinking. Alcohol can lead to fetal cell death, but thousands of women have a few drinks before they realize they’re pregnant. Just . . . take care of yourself from this point. Your body will do its best to protect your child. It’s your job to make it easy.”
“I’m on the wagon from this point on,” I promised. “I just . . . I had no idea.”
She laughed. “You’d be surprised how often I hear that, sometimes from women who come in with severe abdominal pain and have no clue they’re about to deliver.”
“Really? I think the barfing might’ve clued me in eventually. The nausea hit hard for a few days, then it tapered off. Now it’s mostly triggered by certain smells. Is that normal?”
Dr. Rosales answered, “To be honest, every woman and every pregnancy is different. I’ve treated women who were so sick, the whole time, that they were malnourished by the time they delivered. And I’ve admitted those who never had a moment of discomfort.”
“I think I’m jealous. Do you have kids?”
She shook her head. “Too busy.”
We shared a smile. Then I said, “Not that I’m ungrateful, but when will you spring me?”
Her smile widened, telling me she had good news. “That’s why I’m here. I’ve already signed your paperwork, so if you want to call a friend to come get you, you’re ready for discharge.”
“Thanks. I appreciate everything you’ve done.”
With a few words in parting, the doctor went on her way. I crawled out of the hospital bed and rang Shannon’s cell. “I’m out of here. Can you pick me up?”
“I’d be mad if you
She didn’t have a job at the moment, as she had been gone a while, and retail managers didn’t waver when employees stopped coming in. People quit mall jobs just like that all the time; it was a simple matter to replace a clerk. If Shan had a vehicle of her own to drive, it would be easier. I resolved to do something about that, but it couldn’t be my top priority. Once everything else was squared away, I’d help her out.
After hanging up, I got dressed, which took me ten minutes. I was tired and shaky by the time I got my skirt on, and I was grateful someone had thought to bring me one with an elastic waist and flowing lines. The T-shirt wasn’t elegant, but it covered me. At this point, I only cared about the latter, not the former. I shoved my feet into some sandals and waited for Shan, all my other possessions in a plastic bag beside me.
It was half past the hour when Shannon arrived and another fifteen minutes to find an orderly to wheel me down. This was for insurance reasons, but honestly, I wasn’t sure if I had the fortitude to make it to the car on my own anyway. Things felt like they were such a mess, important matters unresolved, and I was in no condition to fix them—now more than ever.
When Shannon had to repeat herself for the fourth time, as she drove me to Chuch and Eva’s place, she finally asked, “What is
“Not anymore. But there’s something major on my mind.”
“Chance,” she guessed.
“For once, no.”
“Kel?”