opportunity of existence ever vouchsafed to Tess by an unsympathetic
First Cause--her all; her every and only chance. How then should he
look upon her as of less consequence than himself; as a pretty trifle
to caress and grow weary of; and not deal in the greatest seriousness
with the affection which he knew that he had awakened in her--so
fervid and so impressionable as she was under her reserve--in order
that it might not agonize and wreck her?
To encounter her daily in the accustomed manner would be to develop
what had begun. Living in such close relations, to meet meant to
fall into endearment; flesh and blood could not resist it; and,
having arrived at no conclusion as to the issue of such a tendency,
he decided to hold aloof for the present from occupations in which
they would be mutually engaged. As yet the harm done was small.
But it was not easy to carry out the resolution never to approach
her. He was driven towards her by every heave of his pulse.
He thought he would go and see his friends. It might be possible
to sound them upon this. In less than five months his term here
would have ended, and after a few additional months spent upon other
farms he would be fully equipped in agricultural knowledge and in
a position to start on his own account. Would not a farmer want a
wife, and should a farmer's wife be a drawing-room wax-figure, or a
woman who understood farming? Notwithstanding the pleasing answer
returned to him by the silence, he resolved to go his journey.
One morning when they sat down to breakfast at Talbothays Dairy some
maid observed that she had not seen anything of Mr Clare that day.
'O no,' said Dairyman Crick. 'Mr Clare has gone hwome to Emminster
to spend a few days wi' his kinsfolk.'
For four impassioned ones around that table the sunshine of the
morning went out at a stroke, and the birds muffled their song.
But neither girl by word or gesture revealed her blankness. 'He's
getting on towards the end of his time wi' me,' added the dairyman,
with a phlegm which unconsciously was brutal; 'and so I suppose he
is beginning to see about his plans elsewhere.'
'How much longer is he to bide here?' asked Izz Huett, the only
one of the gloom-stricken bevy who could trust her voice with the
question.
The others waited for the dairyman's answer as if their lives hung
upon it; Retty, with parted lips, gazing on the tablecloth, Marian
with heat added to her redness, Tess throbbing and looking out at
the meads.
'Well, I can't mind the exact day without looking at my
memorandum-book,' replied Crick, with the same intolerable unconcern.
'And even that may be altered a bit. He'll bide to get a little
practice in the calving out at the straw-yard, for certain. He'll
hang on till the end of the year I should say.'
Four months or so of torturing ecstasy in his society--of 'pleasure
girdled about with pain'. After that the blackness of unutterable
night.
At this moment of the morning Angel Clare was riding along a narrow
