himself intact, if not unmarked. Each time I saw him I was struck anew by how young he still looked. He was twenty-six now, very much a man by every measure, with a few grey hairs at his temples already and a ruggedness to his features that comes from years of hot sun and cold wind, but when he smiled as he scooped up the dice
I could not help but see the child I had redeemed from slavery and adopted twenty years ago. He had always been a good-natured boy, affectionate, laughing, mischievous but even-tempered. It was hard to imagine him killing strangers for a living.
Meto became a soldier at the age of sixteen when he ran off to fight for Catilina. In the battle of Pistoria he gained the scar across his face that he was still so proud of I had thought — hoped — that would be the end of a youthful folly, but Meto still sought the thing he had found with Catilina. He found it again in Caesar. And Caesar, fortunately, had found Meto, discovering his talent for words and taking him into his private service as a sort of literary adjutant. (Caesar the politician was always busy writing and publishing the memoirs of Caesar the general, and commanded his own private troop of wordsmiths.) In recent years Meto had also found service as a translator, having shown an aptitude for learning the Gaulish dialects. In addition to these sedentary pursuits, he still saw plenty of battle and danger, often at the side of the great general himself. I could never stop worrying about him.
He had not yet seen us across the crowded tent. As he rattled the four dice in a cup, he narrowed his eyes and seemed to mutter an invocation — to a god, to a lover? Who were his gods these days? Who were his lovers? We never talked of such things any more. He gave the cup a final shake and let fly the dice.
A hush, the rattle of bones, then more laughter and curses. Meto himself was loudest of all, raising his arms triumphantly in the air as he laughingly announced, 'The Venus Throw! One of each number-the Venus Throw beats all! Pay up, pay up!' The long sleeves of his tunic slid down his upraised arms and I noticed a new scar, red and gnarled, which cut across the biceps of his left arm. It was ugly, but seemed to cause him no awkwardness or pain. He reached into his tunic for a little bag and opened it wide for the others to throw coins into.
Then he saw Eco and me.
I think I knew then how my own face must have looked, on those occasions when I had been separated from him by great distances, and had worried for him, not knowing if he was alive or dead, and then at last had seen him again, often by surprise when he appeared in Rome without announcement. It was the look of a man whose eyes discern in an instant what his heart has spent long hours desiring.
'Doesn't your commander object to your gambling?' I said.
'Not as long as we wager only with coins that have his image on them.' Meto laughed at his own joke. Roman coins do not bear the images of living men, only dead ones. Not even Caesar dared to mint a coin with his own portrait.
We had retired to a quieter place, a tiny room in the villa that was crammed with scrolls, parchments and maps. There was barely room for the three of us. This was the place where Meto did much of his work for Caesar, reading and emending his latest volume of memoirs. Deciding on a consistent spelling of Gaulish names was an ongoing crisis, I gathered.
I asked him how he knew that Eco and I had been missing.
'Diana sent a letter. It's a good thing you taught her to write, you see? Though her syntax is atrocious. You really should spend more time drilling her, Papa, or else hire a decent tutor. I could tell she was very upset. Her hand shook. Here, I'll show you.' He shuffled among a pile of documents and retrieved a slender, folded wooden tablet. I untied the ribbon that held it shut. The letters etched into the wax coating on the inner surface were indeed uncertain and wavering.
Brother,
We are in great worry and sadness here. Papa left on a journey of a few days and on the way back they were attacked and carried off him and Eco.
There is maybe cause for hope. There was a note give to the guard outside the door early this morning, by a man who hid his face. The note was addressed to Mother, but of course I had to read it for her. It says: 'Do not fear for Gordianus and his son. They have not been harmed. They will be returned to you in time.' But who knows who the note is from? Or whether to believe it? It makes me more worried than before, almost.
The city is not as wild as it was, but still dangerous, especially at night. Mother and me, and Menenia and Titus and Titania are all safe. We have plenty of the great man's guards to keep us safe. Don't worry for us. But I long for Papa and Eco to come home! Oh, Cybele, let them come back soon!
I will write again when that happens. Or Papa will write himself to you! Take care of yourself, my brother.
I closed the letter.
'My sister's grammar is poor, Papa, but not so atrocious that you should be moved to tears,' said Meto archly.
I cleared my throat. 'I can hardly stand to think of them, waiting for us, worrying — '
'I arrived in Ravenna only a couple of days ago, from up north. Diana's letter was waiting for me. You can imagine what a fright it gave me. I petitioned Caesar for leave at once, to head home to try to sort things out. I was planning to leave tomorrow. And now here you are! The gods seem to like our family, don't they?'
'It's because we have a family like none other,' said Eco, laughing. 'One of everything! Like the Venus Throw. I think we keep them amused.'
'Well, I'm glad they finally grew bored of watching you and me in that pit,' I said.
Meto frowned. 'In her letter, Diana mentions guards. 'We have plenty of the great man's guards to keep us safe.' What is that about? And where in Hades have you been all this time?'
So we told him the tale, or most of it, as briefly as we could. The sun was fading before we finished.
I opened Diana's letter and read it again, more calmly. Who had sent the note addressed to Bethesda, advising her not to worry? What a peculiar sort of kidnapping!
My wits still must have been dulled by our captivity, for it was only as I reread the letter a third time that an equally obvious question occurred to me. How had Diana known that Eco and I were attacked and abducted on our way home? 'On the way back they were attacked and carried off,' she wrote. Who had seen it happen, and who had told her about it?
Meto found accommodations for us in the villa, in a tiny room even smaller than his office. It reminded me uneasily of the pit. When it came time to sleep I tossed and turned for a while. When Eco began to snore, I realized that I was so sick of being cooped up with him that I might strangle him. So I gathered up a blanket and found Meto, who was still awake and talking with his tentmates. He found a spare cot for me and I pulled it outside, to a spot where I could fall asleep looking at the stars. I wanted to gaze at them for hours, and breathe in the clear, cold air, but I fell into a dreamless sleep almost at once.
The next morning, Meto took us to see Caesar.
A guard escorted us to a courtyard inside the villa. He and Meto seemed to know each other quite well. We sat on a bench to wait. A few moments later, Cicero and Tiro appeared, formally attired in togas and escorted by the same guard. 'I must warn you, he's very busy today,' said the guard to Cicero. 'But I'll do my best to make sure that you see him.'
Cicero and Tiro sat on the bench across from us. Cicero looked rather peeved, I thought.
'Did you not see Caesar yesterday?' I said.
'No. We arrived in the afternoon, of course, when he was at his busiest. You know how it is with these generals. Pompey is the same. Sometimes one has to wait days to see them. You'd think, since I'm here to smooth the way for his next campaign for consul, that he'd see me at once. But of course a man like Caesar has much important business. Every hour is taken.'
I nodded.
A few moments later the guard appeared. Cicero quickly stood and began straightening the folds of his toga. The guard ignored him and nodded to us. 'He'll see you now.'
As we walked past Cicero, I found it hard not to grin. The look on his face was priceless.
Meto had first introduced me to Gaius Julius Caesar some years ago. On subsequent occasions, I never expected him to remember me, but he always did. Caesar's mind was like a fisherman's net. No fact or face, once apprehended, ever slipped away from him.
His study was a spacious room with tall windows thrown open to admit the morning light. One wall was
