anger to fuel them. He’d hit her inner struggle dead center, and she had no clue how to rally.
“You’re lying. Tell me how long you stood there, watching.”
“Right. Baby, we have to get this settled before we go undercover, or else the tension will endanger our mission.”
She stared at him. “That’s all this is about? Our assignment?”
“Of course not. It’s about us and the fact that I gave up too soon.” He shook his head. “This isn’t the ideal place to talk things over. Let’s wait until we get to your house.”
“You’re the one who brought it up — and besides, I’m not sure there’s anything of ‘us’ left to discuss.”
A black brow rose. “You blew that theory the second I woke up to find you at my bedside, and reinforced it when you refused to allow another agent to work undercover with me.”
Wasn’t much she could say to refute him, so she gave him that round. And she noticed that except to pay for their Chinese take-out, he didn’t let go of her hand the entire half-hour drive to her house.
Beautiful son of a bitch.
From the start of the meeting in Michael’s office and on every point since, Blaze had expected more resistance from Emma. More fight. Not that she hadn’t put up some, but he’d seen the woman at her glorious, raging best, and he didn’t know what to make of her now. This softer, more thoughtful Emma was new to him.
And, he had to admit, very welcome. She’d never be a pushover — and he definitely didn’t want her to be — but he could tell she was wrestling with her moral compass. Questioning her choices, past and present. The old Emma had marched down the straight and narrow path, looking neither left nor right, and had missed a ton of fantastic scenery on her trek.
The new Emma was beginning to wonder what she’d overlooked along the way.
Could it be that he hadn’t totally ruined things between them? He’d give anything to salvage what they’d had, build on their fledgling love, make it stronger than before. Able to withstand the tests to come. And there would be plenty of those.
He turned into her driveway and couldn’t help but smile at the flowers next to the house and lining the sidewalk. Their colorful heads bobbed in precise little rows, like soldiers ready to do battle. He envisioned Emma as their general, whipping them into perfect formation, making certain their tiny uniforms were matching, spit and polished.
“What the heck are you smiling about now?”
“Just admiring your flowers,” he said innocently, which earned him a narrow-eyed look of suspicion.
“What’s wrong with my flowers?”
“Nothing! Can’t a man compliment a lady on her garden?” Killing the engine, he grabbed the file they needed and opened his door.
“Well, sure, if you’d said it like you meant it. Never mind.” She rolled her eyes and got out of the car with the take-out bag, shutting the door behind her.
He fell into step with her, gesturing to the flower beds as they stepped onto her front porch. “Have you ever thought about throwing out some wildflower seeds? By this time next year they’d be gorgeous, spreading all over the pl—”
“I knew it! We’re not even inside yet and you’re already planning how to improve my life, just like you always do!” Fishing her keys from her purse, she stabbed the correct one into the lock and let them inside.
“That’s not fair,” he called after her, glancing around her tidy living room. Tidy, hell. The garden outside was a great indicator of the interior — everything in its place and so clean a man could eat off the floor. Nothing had changed.
“Sure, sure. Today it’s my blossoms, tomorrow my boobs. You’ll want me to get enhanced or something. In that, if nothing else, you are entirely predictable, Blaze Kelly.” She plunked her purse, the food, and the keys onto the table and faced him, hands on her lush hips.
“You’ve got me all wrong, sweetness.” His gaze traveled upward, over the curve at her waist to the full breasts pushing at her blouse. And on to her striking face composed of a high forehead and model cheekbones, set off by huge blue eyes. Completing the picture was the short, soft blond hair sticking out in tufts and framing that wonderful face with a wispy fringe. A style that might look way butch on anyone else, but on Emma simply complemented her strong, fine features. Very feminine.
“I don’t think so.”
He stalked closer, invading her space. “I happen to cherish every single thing about you, including your breasts. Always have. So what if I like my garden to grow a little… wild?”
She stood her ground. “Nothing, except you want to change me. Fix me as though I’m broken when nothing could be further from the truth.”
“No. I want to broaden your experiences, put you in touch with a sensuality you never knew you possessed. That’s different.”
“I’m not sensual?” she challenged.
“I didn’t say you weren’t. On the contrary, we’re good together, always have been. And you have all this untapped passion bubbling under that beautiful surface, so potent that it makes me crazy wanting to be the one to unleash it. Give me the chance, Emma. You won’t be sorry.”
And yeah, he was close to begging. Because he wasn’t bullshit-ting her in the least. She was his idea of the ultimate woman: smart, confident, alluring.
“I guess I don’t have a choice, do I? I mean with our assignment looming and all.”
Her words deflated him some, but he pushed down his disappointment and gave her a cocky grin all the same. “I’ll take that for a start because you
He was standing so close to her that he felt her heat radiating right through his clothing to his skin. The warmth drew him in and he reached for her, smoothed a finger along her jaw, traced her lips. Her eyes darkened; whether in lust or in wariness, he couldn’t tell. But she didn’t move away, and he took that as a positive sign.
“I don’t understand why you did it,” she whispered. “Was I so easy to forget?”
He didn’t have to ask what she meant — her quiet pain spoke volumes, wrenched his heart. He took her face in his hands, brushed at a tear that escaped to roll down one creamy cheek, cursing himself all over again. Was there any possible answer that wouldn’t land him in deeper hot water? “No, sweetheart. I was in agony over losing you, and I took refuge in what I know best — being a Dom. Exerting control. It’s what makes sense to me — it’s who I am.”
“Sounds like a line of bull.”
He shook his head. “No. It’s my lifestyle.”
“So you’ve said.”
“I’d never use sex as punishment, or to make anyone else feel bad, especially you. How do I explain?” He sighed. “Sex is natural, baby. There’s nothing shameful about two or more consenting adults taking pleasure in each other’s bodies. I’m not sorry you saw what you did… I’m only sorry about the circumstances surrounding it. Given the chance, I’d bring you into every scene as my sub. My partner, and not because of some damned job. You’d never be on the outside again.”
Her eyes widened, her expression so vulnerable it shook him to his toes. “What if… what if I’d come inside that night? Joined the three of you instead of running away.”
He could’ve shouted in joy, and barely restrained himself from doing so. This was exactly the path he’d hoped she’d eventually wander. Gently, he brushed a kiss across her lips. “You would’ve been welcomed with open arms,” he said quietly. “I would’ve taken great pride in introducing you as mine, in showing you a world steeped in passion and mutual pleasure. A world in which jealousy has no part, and sharing is perfectly acceptable.”
