that.
'What does he want?' he said ruminatively. 'He wants money and beautiful women and the good things of this world. You and I probably want exactly the same, but Godfrey wants them the easy way. For him, that means a kind of animal force. Rob a drugstore cash register. Push a competitor down a flight of cement steps. Make love to innocent women so they'll do what you want. What you need. He goes bulling his way through life, all shoulders and elbows. And God help you if you get in his way. He has a short fuse — did you know that? A really violent temper. He learned to keep it under control, but I once saw what he did to a kid in scrimmage. This kid had made Godfrey look bad on a pass play. The next time we had a pileup, I saw Godfrey go after him. It was just naked violence; that's the only way I can describe it. Really vicious stuff. That kid was lucky to come out alive.'
I was silent, thinking of Solomon Kipper and Professor Yale Stonehouse. They hadn't come out of the pileup.
'What does he want?' Jesse Karp repeated reflectively.
'I'll tell you something odd. When Godfrey and I were kids, almost everyone collected baseball cards. You know — those pictures of players you got in a package of bubblegum. Godfrey never collected them. You know what he saved? He showed me his collection once. Models and movie stars. Yachts and mansions. Jewellery and antiques.
Paintings and sculpture. He wanted to own it all.'
'The American dream?' I asked.
' W e l l. . ' he said, 'maybe. But skewed. Gone bad. He wanted it all right now.'
'Why did he go into the ministry?' I asked.
He lifted his eyes to stare at me. 'Why do you think?'
'To avoid the draft?'
'That's my guess,' Jesse Karp said, shrugging. 'I could be wrong.'
'Was Knurr ever married?'
'Not to my knowledge,' he said too quickly.
'I understand there is a Reverend Stokes who helped him?'
'That's right. The Reverend Ludwig Stokes. He's retired now.'
'Goldie Knurr hinted that he's fuddled, that he drinks too much.'
'He's an old, old man,' Jesse Karp said stonily. 'He's entitled.'
'Could you tell me where I might find him?'
'The last I heard he was living in a white frame house two doors south of St Paul's on Versailles.'
He glanced obviously at his wristwatch and I rose immediately to my feet. I thanked him for his kind cooperation. He helped me on with my coat and walked me to the door.
'I'll let you know how it all comes out,' I told him.
'Don't bother,' he said coldly. 'I really don't want to know.'
I was saddened by the bitterness in his voice. It had all happened so many years ago, but he still carried the scars.
He had been duped and made a fool of. He had thought he had a friend who liked him for what he was. The friend had turned out to be just another white exploiter. I wondered how that discovery had changed Jesse Karp's life.
At the doorway, I thought of something else and turned to him.
'Do you remember a girl Knurr dated, probably in high school — a short, lovely girl with long blonde hair? She had a heavy metal brace on one leg. Maybe polio.'
He stared at me, through me, his high brow rippling.
'Yes,' he said slowly, 'I do remember. She limped badly.
Very slender.'
'Fragile looking,' I said. 'Wistful.'
'Yes, I remember. But I can't recall her name. Wait a minute.'
He went back to the glass-enclosed bookcase set against the far wall. He opened one of the shelf doors, searched, withdrew a volume bound in maroon. Plastic stamped to look like leather.
'Our yearbook,' he said, smiling shyly. 'The year Godfrey and I graduated. I still keep it.'
I liked him very much then.
I stood at his side as he balanced the wide volume atop the mess at his desk and flipped through the pages rapidly.
He found the section with small, individual photographs of graduating seniors, head-and-shoulder shots. Then Jesse Karp turned the pages slowly, a broad forefinger running down the columns of pictures, names, school biographies.
'Here I am,' he said laughing. 'God, what a beast!'
I leaned to look: Jesse Karp, not a beast, but an earnest, 390
self-conscious kid in a stiff white collar and a tie in a horrendous pattern. Most of the other boys were wearing suit jackets, but Karp wasn't. I didn't remark on it.
'Not so bad,' I said, looking at the features not yet pulled with age. 'You look like it was the most solemn moment of your life.'
'It was,' he said, staring down at the book. 'I was the first of my family to be graduated from high school. It was something. And here's Godfrey.'
Directly below Karp's photograph was that of Knurr, wearing a sharply patterned sport jacket. He was smiling at the camera, his chin lifted. Handsome, strong, arrogant. A Golden Boy. He had written an inscription in the yearbook directly below Karp's biography: 'To Jesse, my very best friend ever. Godfrey Knurr.' I guessed he had written that same sentiment in many McKinley High yearbooks.
Each student had a pithy motto or prediction printed in italic type below his biography. Jesse Karp's said: A slow but sure winner.
Godfrey Knurr's was: We'll be hearing of him for many years to come.
The Principal continued flipping through the pages of stamp-sized portraits. Finally his finger stopped.
'This one?' he said, looking at me.
I glanced down. It was the same girl I had seen in Goldie Knurr's photo album. The same pale gold beauty, the same soft vulnerability.
'Yes,' I said, reading her name. 'Sylvia Wiesenfeld. Do you know anything about her?'
He closed the yearbook with his two hands, slapping the volume with what I thought was unusual vehemence. He went back to the bookcase to restore the book to its place and close the glass door.
'Why are you asking about her?' he demanded, his back to me. I thought something new had come into his voice: a note of hostility.
'Just curious,' I said. 'She's so beautiful.'
'Her father owned a drugstore,' he said grudgingly.
'He's dead now — the father. I don't know what happened to her.'
'Was this the drugstore where Godfrey Knurr worked after school?'
'Yes,' he said shortly.
He insisted on personally accompanying me through the outer offices, down the hallways and staircases to the front entrance of McKinley High School. I didn't know if he was being polite or wanted to make certain I didn't loiter about the premises.
I thanked him again for his kindness and he sent me on my way. He didn't exactly push me out of the door, but he made certain I exited. I didn't think he regretted what he had told me about Godfrey Knurr. I thought he was ashamed and angry at what he had revealed about himself.
I had set the old wounds throbbing.
On the sidewalk, I turned and looked back at the high school, a pile of red brick so ugly it was impressive. I had brief and sententious thoughts of the thousands — maybe millions! — of young students who had walked those gloomy corridors, sat at those worn desks, who had laughed, wept, frolicked, and discovered despair.
I found the white frame house two doors south of St Paul's on Versailles Street. Perhaps it had once been white, but now it was a powdery grey, lashed by rain and wind, scoured by the sun. It looked at the world with blind eyes: uncurtained windows with torn green shades drawn at various levels. The cast-iron fence was rusted, the tiny
