Unfortunately, it seemed that Lucius had somehow sensed this proviso in his brother’s promise and, one night shortly before he left, Lex had woken up at about three o’clock in the morning to the sight of a huge fire flickering through his bedroom window. His first thought was that the fire-breathing rabbit he’d inadvertently let off the enchanter’s ship was now back. He leapt out of bed, dragged on some trousers and was still doing them up as he ran out into the house, screaming for Lucius and Zachary.
‘Wake up! Wake up! It’s back! The fire-breathing rabbit is back; the barn’s on fire!’
He ran out of the house with Zachary moments behind him only to find that Lucius was already there. And it was not the barn that was on fire. It was a big bonfire of twenty or thirty enchanter’s hats, now blackened, shrivelled and ruined.
Lex stared at the bonfire in silent, speechless horror for a long moment, vaguely aware of Zachary stomping into the house, back to his bed. Then he turned to stare at his twin who stood there with his arms folded and a grimly determined expression on his face.
‘What have you done?’ Lex croaked. ‘What have you done, you idiot?’
‘I knew it!’ Lucius replied, actually having the audacity to look hurt. ‘I knew you hadn’t meant what you said when you made that promise! That’s why I knew I had to get rid of the hats.’
‘You… you…’ For once in his life, Lex could hardly find the words to express himself. It wasn’t just that one of the most rare and powerful magical advantages he had was now lost, it was the fact that Lucius had taken it upon himself to go into Lex’s ship and destroy Lex’s things.
‘Those hats saved your life!’ he fumed, pointing at the smoking, blazing bonfire. ‘When you were sent down to the Lands Beneath, do you think in a million years that I would ever have been able to get you out if I hadn’t had one of those to get me there in the first place?’
‘You got yourself there but Lady Luck got us out,’ Lucius said, raising his chin stubbornly. ‘If you’d used that hat a second time you’d have killed yourself. I know you, Lex. Your definition of an emergency would have been losing a round. You wouldn’t have kept the hats just for matters of life or death. You’re more likely to kill yourself with those hats than you are to save yourself. That’s why I’m getting rid of them. Hate me if you like; I don’t care. You’re the only family I’ve got left and it’s bad enough that you’re playing in another one of those awful Games at all. I’m helping you.’
Lex looked at his brother, firelight flickering over a face that was identical to his own despite the fact that the person behind it was so different. How could Lucius not understand? How could he not appreciate how important it was to win? How could the thought of losing to someone else not make him feel positively panic-stricken?
Lex was strongly tempted, in that moment, to hit his brother for the first time in his life. But he clenched his fists and resisted the urge, contenting himself instead with snarling in a vicious tone, ‘Next time you “help me” I promise you’ll regret it! I won’t forget this, Lucius! Never!’
And, exercising an impressive amount of self-control, Lex turned on his heel and stalked back into the house without slapping Lucius, or shoving him, or scratching his eyes out, or anything.
So there were no longer any enchanted hats in the wardrobe on the ship. Lex nurtured some faint hope that one might turn up elsewhere at some point, for there were plenty of rooms he had not gone into yet and you never knew what might suddenly appear on this ship. But for now at least, he had a total lack of magic hats. He did, however, have a lot of different disguises in the wardrobe. He’d purchased them before he left because, as any thief or con man knows, disguises are very important. Not to mention ridiculously fun.
Lex picked out the Trent Lexington costume? a character first created when he’d been a relative newbie at robbing and scamming, and was practising pickpocketing in the Gaming stadiums. He’d realised that people were much less likely to suspect you were a petty thief if you looked like a posh twit. The costume therefore consisted of a daft-looking frock coat (with tails and everything), fine black trousers, a white shirt and cravat, a top hat, a pair of gloves and? most importantly of all? a stick with a shiny gold knob at the end. Oh, and a monocle. Lex had added the monocle only recently because he thought it might help with disguising his face if anyone were to think that he looked familiar. For starters, it magnified his right eye in rather a startling way whilst at the same time forcing him to squint with his left. Lex was extremely pleased with the effect because, as well as disguising his face, it also helped give him the sort of pained, constipated expression that one rather expected to see on a spoilt young nobleman.
Lex was just admiring his reflection in the mirror when Jesse wandered into the room and visibly jumped at the sight of him. Then he realised it was only Lex and a smile crept over the cowboy’s face as he crossed his arms in front of his chest and leaned against the doorframe. ‘And just where are you going in that get-up?’ he asked, eyebrow raised.
‘Just to have a little mingle in the teashop,’ Lex replied with a shrug. ‘You can stay here on the boat.’ Jesse looked like showing signs of protest but Lex cut him off before he could do so: ‘I’ll bring you back a scone. There’s no need for you to come; you’d stick out like a sore thumb and I want to blend in.’
Jesse shrugged. ‘All righty. Guess I’ll just hang out here with the griffins then.’
‘Yes.’ Lex nodded. ‘I’ll see you later.’
He walked out of the room and downstairs. He’d been a little worried that getting off the ship without being seen might pose a problem but it seemed it would not be too difficult because the toffs had all gone back to their tea after the ship had docked and they’d realised that it wasn’t going to be doing anything exciting for the time being. If there’s one thing you can absolutely rely upon remaining the same, it’s the love rich people have for their crumpets and scones.
Just to be on the safe side, anyway, Lex opened the door on the side of the ship that faced away from the teashop. From there he was able to jump on to the tourist boat docked alongside and walk off its gangplank on to the harbour. If anyone saw him alighting from the boat they would merely think he was a young lord who had been taking a nap and no one had bothered to wake him up when they arrived. He plastered a miffed expression onto his face and then stalked on to the veranda, immediately adapting his Trent Lexington walk and mannerisms, head held so loftily high that he was practically viewing the scene through his nostrils. It had taken him a fair amount of practice to walk like that without losing his hat, for it had a tendency to topple off his head when he stuck his nose in the air, but he had mastered the knack eventually.
‘Ai simply can’t believe that you didn’t wake me up, Mama!’ Lex exclaimed in a loud, snotty voice to no one in particular as he walked through the veranda, thus creating the distinct impression that he was part of some unfortunate family there. Then he opened the door into the tearoom, walked in and said loudly to the room in general, ‘Ai say! Are you still serving elevenses or aren’t you?’
‘We are, sir-’ the server began but Lex cut him off.
‘Well, what does a fellow have to do to get some crumpets around heyah? Do you think this is acceptable?’
‘If you’d just place your order with me, sir, I will gladly-’
‘Oh, very well, very well,’ Lex said irritably, as if placing his order was a great inconvenience to him. ‘Ai want a pot of tea. And ai want crumpets.’
‘Butter or jam with the crumpets, sir?’
Lex turned his head, looked directly at the server? who was not much older than he was? and affected an expression of utter horror. ‘Do people really eat jam with crumpets nowadays?’ he asked as if it was the most disgusting thing he’d ever heard of. ‘My heavens, you’ll be asking me if I want ham with crumpets next, I shouldn’t wonder. Butter, boy! I want butter, naturally.’
‘I’m very sorry, sir,’ the server replied, completely unaffected by Lex’s tantrum, thus proving that he must have worked at the Sea Volcanoes teashop a while now and so was accustomed to rudeness. ‘Would you like milk with your tea, sir?’
‘Yaas, naturally.’
‘I’ll bring it right out to you as soon as it’s ready.’
‘Very well.’
Lex turned and walked back to the door, managing to collide with someone who was coming through it from the other side. It was a woman with a silly hat and an expression that indicated she’d just been drinking cups of vinegar outside rather than tea. She also looked rather like she might have been crying in the not-too-distant past.
‘Watch where you’re going, young man, really!’ she said huffily.
‘Ai’m very sorry, madam,’ Lex apologised in his best sulky voice. As he walked out to the veranda he could
