Truth about Mr. Darcy

Elizabeth averted her eyes, unsure of what she should relate—certainly not their lovemaking from the previous night. “I… it was more, yes. To be honest, much more.” She dared a glance at Jane. “Are you terribly shocked?”

“No, not terribly, I suppose. I always suspected with your liveliness and your passion for life, you might be inclined to act far more impetuously than I ever could, Lizzy. Oh dear! Please, forgive me. I certainly did not mean to imply such a thing!”

Elizabeth only laughed. “Jane, please. You have said nothing at all that has caused me any offense. You are correct, though. I have never been, with regard to many matters, as conventional and reserved as our parents could have wished, nor so concerned with following the dictates of proper propriety as you undoubtedly are, especially where Mr. Darcy is concerned. As a matter of fact, my behavior, if you were aware of the half of it, would certainly shock you. Yet, still, I cannot bring myself to repent any of it. In fact, I would happily repeat it many times over. There. That, I am sure, must certainly succeed in shocking you.”

“Oh, Lizzy, it is not what I think nor what anyone else thinks that truly matters, but what you believe. Surely, if Mr. Darcy does not object to receiving your affections, then what business is it of the rest of the world? So dear as you are to me, you must know I would never judge you in such a manner. We are, both of us, very different in our own ways, yet in some ways we are similar.”

Elizabeth was surprised. “Jane, do you mean to tell me you have allowed Mr. Bingley to take liberties with you?” she teased.

Jane looked down and examined her lap. “Not so many, Lizzy. We have held hands, and I have allowed him to kiss me. On several occasions in particular, his kisses were very… expressive. If Mr. Darcy’s kisses are half so pleasant as Charles’s kisses are, then I can certainly comprehend how it could easily lead to greater acts of intimacy between the two of you.”

After such a bold declaration, Jane could not help blushing profusely, now more than eager to change the subject. “Enough. Now I will help you to dress, or you shall miss breakfast as well as supper.” As she assisted Elizabeth with her toilette, however, she fixed her with a sly look. “I am sure Mr. Darcy is quite anxious to see you, Lizzy. I do believe he would have come himself to inquire after you this morning if it had not been at all improper.”

Elizabeth only smiled as Jane fastened the buttons on her gown.

*   *   *

Darcy slipped his arms around Elizabeth’s waist and pulled her into a sitting room just outside the breakfast parlor. “Forgive my boldness, Miss Bennet,” he whispered as he kissed her neck, “but it has been my observation that Caroline Bingley has never managed to look half so fetching while wearing this gown.”

“Well then, sir, I shall take that as a compliment, although I cannot say I am at all comfortable wearing it in company.” Indeed, her decolletage was extremely revealing.

He looked at her then with some degree of concern. “Are you…uncomfortable in any other way, Elizabeth? Last night… was I too rough with you, my love?”

Elizabeth gazed into his troubled eyes. She gave him a small, reassuring smile and shook her head, her curls bobbing. “Not at all, Fitzwilliam. I feel only some minor soreness from all the… exercise we engaged in last night. Aside from that, and being a little tired, I am fine; as for being too rough with me, I can assure you, sir, that was not the case, far from it. You were all that was gentle and considerate.”

Darcy sighed. “I am thankful to hear it.” He then looked away and, in a worried voice, said, “Are you… that is to say… do you at all…” He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly before finally saying, “Elizabeth, my love, do you now regret that we have anticipated our vows? Does it trouble you that you will no longer come to my bed as an innocent on our wedding night?” His agitation was extreme.

Elizabeth reached out and, caressing his jaw, said, “Indeed, I have no regrets. I love you, Fitzwilliam, and I cannot but treasure this new-found intimacy between us just as I treasure you—with my whole heart. The only regret I have is that you may, very soon after we are married, in fact, find me shirking my duties as the mistress of Pemberley in favor of the far more pleasurable duties I now know I will have when I am your wife.”

“Elizabeth,” he whispered, his eyes flaring as his gaze drifted from her lips to settle upon her ample bosom.

Seeing as they were in a public room, however, Elizabeth felt it best to keep their physical interaction somewhat more chaste. In an attempt to divert his present musings, she laughed quietly and said, “May I dare to hope, sir, that there will be very little chance of my appearing in a gown such as this one once I become the mistress of your great estate? I doubt very much you would wish for your wife to appear in society wearing such a garish creation!” Her teasing, however, had precisely the opposite effect.

Pressing her body more firmly against his, Darcy muttered, “Certainly not. However, I should have imagined you to be filled with nothing but gratitude today for having been spared the necessity of donning one of those dreadful orange horrors Miss Bingley seems to favor. Heaven knows she must have dozens at her disposal… though, I must confess, you would, no doubt, lend even the most unappealing garment in her wardrobe an air of complete allurement.” With a rakish look, he lowered his head to allow his lips to graze the enticing swell of her breasts as his thumbs caressed her nipples through the fabric.

“Fitzwilliam, not here!” She pushed him away with an arch smile. Caroline Bingley’s disdainful voice could be heard with relative ease as she abused one of the servants over the sparse selection of fruit on the sideboard.

“If not here, then where?” he whispered. “Elizabeth, take pity on me. You cannot expect me to conduct myself as a gentleman when you appear to such… advantage in this insidious dress.” His lips claimed hers with a ferocity that caught her off guard while his hands roamed along her curves in the most intoxicating manner. When Darcy finally released her, he rested his forehead against hers and said, “Truly, I have no idea how I will ever survive this engagement after making love to you last night. I fear I will never be able to sleep again without you in my arms.”

“Mmm… nor I,” she murmured as she stroked his cheek. “When I awoke this morning, I was disappointed to find you gone, though I know I should not have been surprised. I realize the risk we took and how dangerous it would have been to be found together in such a compromising situation.”

“It is perhaps more dangerous than we have considered. It has occurred to me there could be consequences from last night, Elizabeth, and perhaps from tonight, as well, should this storm continue as it does.” He gave her a deep, penetrating look that caused her eyes to widen and her breath to quicken.

“I have been thinking that, perhaps, I should ride to London as soon as the weather clears to procure a special license, that is, if it is acceptable to you. I feel it would be for the best if we were to marry as soon as possible… for obvious reasons, though I cannot say I am anticipating the conversation I shall be forced to have with your father on this subject.”

A blush heated Elizabeth’s cheeks, and she looked away. “No, I would imagine not. He will not be pleased.”

“And I cannot say I would blame him. I would not be inclined to look favorably upon any man who came to me to suggest such a thing in Georgiana’s case.” Darcy could not stop himself from exploring the low neckline of her gown with the tips of his fingers.

Elizabeth made a fair attempt to ignore him as she felt herself moved to confess certain concerns that had been preying upon her conscience. “What about my cousin? Our marrying so soon after becoming engaged will, no doubt, be seen as nothing short of scandalous, and it can only serve to help him carry his point with your aunt, as well, not to mention any gossips who may happen to hear the tales of our prior indiscretions.” She found it difficult to conceal her bitter resentment toward the clergyman and his officious interference.

“And then there is the question of your sister. She will come out soon, and I would not wish to have society judge her unfairly based upon our sins any more than my own dear sisters. It pains me to think I may have brought such an injury upon her—I, whom she has never before so much as seen. Nor do I wish for the first report of me to reach her ears to be of my wanton behavior with her beloved brother. Whatever will she think of me, Fitzwilliam?”

“You underestimate Georgiana, Elizabeth; and me, for that matter. Do you imagine that I have never written of you to my sister, nor enumerated your merits and charms in nearly every letter I have addressed to her since my first entering Hertfordshire? Do you believe her ignorant of my initial struggles and my utter elation upon your