he serviced her, she was going to spend the next ten or twelve hours in hell. She needed a male—him—inside of her, taking care of her—
Tohr lunged for the glass door, arm outstretched, hand ready to shove the transparent, fragile barrier aside.
He caught himself just as he opened the way.
What the fuck was he doing? What the
Another scream echoed down to him, and he sagged as a wave of sexual instinct nearly brought him to his knees. As his higher reasoning browned out again, his thought patterns ground to a halt as all he could think about was mounting Autumn and easing her torment.
But as the hormones ebbed, his brain started cranking over again.
“No,” he barked. “No, no fucking way.”
Pushing himself away from the door, he scrambled backward until he hit the desk and grabbed onto the thing in preparation for the next onslaught.
Images of Wellsie’s needing, the one when they had conceived their young, flickered through his mind, the onslaught as unrelenting and undeniable as his body’s urges. His Wellsie had been in such pain, crippling pain.…
He’d come home just before dawn, hungry, tired, thinking he was going to enjoy a good meal and some bad TV before they fell asleep against each other… but as soon as he’d entered through their garage, he’d had the same response he was fighting now: an overwhelming urge to mate.
There was only one thing that caused that kind of reaction.
Six months before that, Wellsie had made him swear, on the very basis of their sanctified mating, that when she went into her next needing, he would not drug her. Man, they’d had a fight over that. He hadn’t wanted to lose her to the birthing bed; like a lot of bonded males, he would have rather they remain childless for the rest of their long lives together than for him to be left with nothing.
He couldn’t remember now what he’d said to her then. No doubt he’d tried to calm her down, but it hadn’t worked.
What had he said to her? Fuck him, he didn’t know. But he could picture her face clear as day as she’d stared up at him.
Little had they known that he’d be the one left behind. That the young wouldn’t be why she died. That all the things they had fought over that night hadn’t been the right worries.
But life was like that. And as soon as he’d walked into their house, he’d wanted to call Havers, had even gone to the phone. But in the end, and as usual, he hadn’t been able to deny her.
And instead of bleeding after the needing had passed, she’d found herself pregnant.
The next scream was so loud, it was a wonder it didn’t shatter the glass door.
Jane burst into the office. “Tohr! Listen, I need your help—”
As his hands clawed into the desk’s edge to keep himself in place, he shook his head like a crazy man. “I’m not doing it. I’m not servicing her—no fucking way. I’m not doing it, I’m not doing it, I’m not doing it—”
Babbling, he was fucking babbling. He didn’t even hear his own words as he started to lift up the desk and slam it down over and over again, until something hard and heavy got knocked onto the floor.
Somewhere in the back of his mind, he dimly thought it was too fucking ironic that he was losing it in this room again.
He’d found out Wellsie was dead in here.
Jane held her hands up. “No, wait, I need your help—but not in that way—”
Another wave of instinct made him grit his teeth and have to bow his upper body as he cursed.
“She told me not to call you—”
Then why was he here? Oh, fucking hell, the urge— “Then why did you text me!”
“She won’t take any drugs.”
Tohr shook his head—only this time it was in an attempt to improve his hearing. “What?”
“She’s refusing the drugs. I can’t get her to consent, and I didn’t know who else to call. I can’t reach Xhex —and no one else is close to her. She’s suffering—”
“Drug her anyway—”
“She’s stronger than I am. I can’t even get her back on the bed without her lashing out. But that’s not the point—ethically, I can’t treat someone who doesn’t let me. I won’t do that. Maybe you can talk to her?”
At that point, Tohr’s eyes got with the program and actually focused on the female. Her white coat was torn, one lapel hanging loosely like a flap of white skin. Clearly she’d been roughed up.
Tohr thought of Wellsie in her needing. When he’d gotten down to their room, it had looked like the place had been ransacked. The bedside table and everything on it knocked over and broken. The clock radio on the floor. The pillows off the mattress, the sheets split.
He’d found his female on the far side, on the carpet, in a ball of agony. She’d been naked, but flushed and sweating even though it had been cold.
He’d never forget the way she had looked up at him and, through her tears, begged him for what he could give her.
Tohr had mounted her fully clothed.
“Tohr…?
“Have you quarantined the other males?” he mumbled.
“Yes. I even had to send Manny away. He was…”
“Yeah.” The guy was probably calling Payne in from the field. Either that or spending a lot of meaningful time with his left hand: Once a male got exposed, he was perma-hard for some time, even if he left the vicinity.
“I also told Ehlena—and she said she’s got to stay away. I guess sometimes one female’s cycle can affect the others? And nobody wants to be pregnant around here.”
Tohr put his hands on his hips and bowed his head, pulling his shit together. He told himself he was not some animal to take Autumn on whatever bed she was lying on. He was not.…
Shit, how much was he willing to trust that resolution? And what the hell was she thinking? Why the fuck wasn’t she taking the drugs?
Maybe this was a ploy. To get him to service her.
Could she be that calculating?
The next scream was heart-wrenching—and pissed him off. In its wake, he told himself to turn around to the supply cabinet and put the thing to good use—except he couldn’t leave Doc Jane. Sure enough, she’d make another attempt to help Autumn and get shanked again.
He looked over at the healer. “Let’s go down together—and I don’t care if she consents or not. You’re going to put her out of that misery even if I have to pin her to the fucking floor.”
Tohr took a couple of bracing breaths, jacked up his leathers.
Jane was talking to him, no doubt spouting all kinds of ethical-this and ethical-that, but he wasn’t hearing it.
That walk down the corridor took forever: With each step, his body’s needs tightened up, transforming him into a bomb of instinct. By the time he got to the door of the recovery room she was in, he was bent over, clutching himself at the groin even in front of Doc Jane. His cock was pounding, his hips straining—
He opened the door. “Fuuuuck…”
His bones nearly snapped in two as half of him went to lunge forward and the other half had to hold himself back by the steel jamb.
Autumn was on the bed, on her stomach, one knee up to her chest, her other leg extended out at a tortured