Shay grabbed a towel and held it against her stomach, covering herself. “I’m sorry. I just…”
“What? You just regretted it? You realized it was me in your bed and not Jamie?”
Shay gaped at him. “What does Jamie have to do with this?”
Cody reached over and shut off the shower. “Well, someone got between us in there. You almost married the guy. If it wasn’t him, who was it?”
“It had nothing to do with Jamie.”
His gaze was hard. “I don’t believe you.”
Her frustration, hurt, and anger spewed out like a volcano. “It wasn’t Jamie. It was the baby,” she yelled.
He looked like she’d slapped him. “Baby?” His gaze dropped to her stomach. He sat on the edge of the bathtub. “You’re pregnant?”
What had she done? God, what had she done?
He rubbed his hands through his hair, shook his head, and she waited for the questions. They weren’t what she expected.
“It doesn’t matter, Shay. Even if it’s Jamie’s, it’s still part of you.” He held his hand over his heart, his beautiful, strong fingers trembling only slightly. “I love you. I can love it too.”
Shay stared at Cody, her eyes filling with tears again. “I’m not pregnant, but I was, nine years ago.”
Chapter 11
“Nine…” Cody’s expression went through several levels of shock. “A baby,” he whispered. “We made a baby? You and me?”
“Yes.”
Raw emotion swept over his face. “But where is it?”
“Something went wrong. It was born too early.”
“Why didn’t you tell—
“I didn’t mention the baby, I just said I needed you to come.”
“And you thought I didn’t care?” His voice strangled with hurt. “I would have done anything for you.”
“I’m sorry. I should have known, but after everything that happened, after I wouldn’t talk to you, I figured you were mad at me, or that you’d just moved on. I should have kept calling.”
“A baby? We made a baby.” Cody rubbed his hands over his face, his eyes lost.
Shay could still see the stark walls of the emergency room and the blood running down her legs, pooling on the white floor, so much blood for something so tiny and frail. The nurses rushing her to the delivery room as her uterus contracted, expelling the life it held before it could take its first breath. “I was five months pregnant. Five months and twenty-two days. No one knew, not even Renee, until I went to the hospital.” Shay’s voice dropped to a whisper and then cracked. “It was a boy. He’s buried in Lake Placid, in a small graveyard close to where I lived. That’s where I was the day you came to the apartment. I was burying him. Renee was sick and couldn’t come.” Shay had named him Alexander. She would tell Cody that later.
“You buried him alone? Oh God, Shay.” He dropped to his knees in front of her and pulled her close, his head pressed to her hair. A tear fell on her forehead and rolled down her cheek. They sat in the bathroom, her on the toilet, him kneeling before her, not speaking, just touching, grieving for a life they created and lost. She had carried her secret for so long it stripped her bare to finally share her grief, to acknowledge her son, Cody’s son, after having to hide him from everyone. Hiding his existence had been almost as hard as carrying him inside her, feeling the little kicks and hiccups, and then having to bury him in the cold ground.
After the tears, she and Cody stood under the shower, holding each other as the water washed away the worst of their grief. As Cody wrapped her in a towel and dried her hair, they exchanged soft touches born of solace, not lust.
“Did you see that?” Shay asked as they stepped out of the bathroom.
“See what?” Cody asked.
“Something moved past the window.”
Cody tensed, listening. “There’s someone on the porch,” he whispered. He quietly pulled on his jeans, grabbed the gun and his dagger. He handed her the gun. “Take this. Lock the door after I leave, and hide under the bed.”
“Hide?”
“If anyone comes in, shoot for the heart.” He held the dagger and pushed a button. There was a click as the blade extended into a sword.
Her pulse pounded. “Let me come with you,” she said, quickly dressing.
“No. It’s too dangerous.”
“What if someone’s out there, and this is exactly what he wants, for you to leave me alone?” She knew Cody was a skilled killer. At one time, that would have made her shiver. Now she found it comforting. She watched him struggle with his thoughts. “Please.” She’d rather face a dragon with Cody at her side than wait alone for shadows to attack.
He sniffed the air. “No.” His voice sounded like steel. “Don’t leave this cabin. No matter what.” Cody walked to the door, came back, cupped her head, and kissed her. “Don’t leave,” he said again, and then he was gone. She locked the door behind him and watched from the window as he melted into the night. Where did he go? Her eyes scanned the dark, trying to make out his form. At first she thought the shadows were clouds drifting over the moon, then she saw the shape of them, like men, but they didn’t move like men. They glided. They were following Cody.
