'Well, I'm not sure about the underfootmen,' he conceded. 'They might have hobbled off to heal on their own somewhere. But there are feathers all over my apartment, if you don't believe I've heroically slain that dastardly pillow.'
He smiled back at her, then shook his head.
'Seriously. How do people manage these things?'
'Oh, Darcel, you poor man. We don't have time for deportment lessons. Let me see … oh, dear.
Hmmmm … All right, when you walk, you have to keep your left arm sort of clamped, like this.'
She touched his wrist to move his arm into position, and a pleasant tingle seemed to radiate from her fingers. One which both of them resolutely ignored … for the moment.
'There. You keep this arm cocked, and that contains the capelets … unless the wind gets up, at least.'
She smiled and reached up to twitch the multiple layers of silk into order. 'Then this piece goes like so, over this shoulder.' She adjusted the richly embroidered sword sling over his left shoulder. 'That helps with the capelets, too, and lets you tuck the sword hilt under this chain and keep it out of the way. You'll just have to pay attention to where the end of the scabbard is behind you, I'm afraid.'
'Lovely. I'll probably rap an empress or a duke or president across the knees. Better yet, I'll get it tangled between their ankles and send them sprawling. That should be an impressive start to this new political career of mine!'
She spluttered with laughter again, then shook her head.
'I'm sorry, Darcel. I don't mean to laugh at you. I mean, I do, but-' She shook her head again. 'It's just that most of the courtiers positively preen on occasions like this. They can't wait to get into fancy costume and show it off. And Earl Ilforth makes preening in his finery a permanent pastime. That's why it's so refreshing to find someone who actually hates court dress as much as I do.'
His eyes widened.
'Why in the multiverse would you hate wearing a gown that makes you look like a goddess?' he demanded, and her entire face flamed at his simple sincerity. Then she surprised him with a tart rejoinder.
'Because it weighs about sixty pounds, the corset is made of steel, these stiletto-heeled shoes pinch my feet and make my calves scream, and the trailing skirts and these ridiculous, yard-long sleeves tend to snag on things- like other people's swords, three thousand year-old statuary, and the occasional rosebush.'
'Oh.' It was his turn to laugh. 'Oh, dear. How are we going to get through the day in these things?'
'By gritting our teeth, smiling, and thinking very hard about long, hot baths and witch hazel for the chafed spots and bruises.'
'Bruises?'
'You don't want to know,' she assured him. 'I did mention that the corset is made out of steel, didn't I?'
She gave him a bright smile. 'Still, at least we both have the comfort of someone to commiserate with now. And, speaking of 'now,' we really must get moving. The marshal's reserved a place of honor for you.'
She hadn't been joking about his position in the parade, he discovered when they arrived at the designated float. The bunting-draped vehicle, drawn by a beautifully matched pair of gray Shikowr geldings, was smaller than many of the others … but it was also sandwiched between those of the Portal Authority's first director and the imperial family.
And, unlike First Director Limana or the Emperor's family, he had his float all to himself.
He turned towards Alazon and opened his mouth, but she spoke before he could.
'First,' she said firmly, 'it's far too late for us to be changing the order of the parade now. You're stuck with this one. Second, it was First Director Limana's suggestion that you be assigned your own float, and I think his instincts were right. And third, His Majesty wants your political career properly launched. In other words, there's no way out, so you might as well just climb up there, smile, and pretend you like it.'
He almost argued anyway. Fortunately, his own sense of the ridiculous came to his rescue before he completed the process of making a fool out of himself, and he bent his head in submission.
'Yes, ma'am,' he said meekly.
'Good. Now, get!'
She made shooing motions with both hands, and after making certain he had the rapier throttled into at least temporary submission, he started obediently up the short, steep ladder.
He managed to make it to the top without killing himself or any innocent passersby, and settled himself into the surprisingly comfortable seat. For all intents and purposes, the thing Alazon had insisted upon calling a 'float,' was simply an unusually impractical and unstable carriage. Despite her assurances that even the two-wheeled floats like his 'almost never fall over,' Kinlafia felt more than a little insecure as he surveyed the world from his high perch. The fact that the float came equipped with a seat belt didn't exactly inspire him with confidence, either, although he felt profoundly grateful for its presence as he strapped himself securely in.
Once he was reasonably confident that he wasn't about to plunge to his doom, he drew a deep breath and looked around him at the assembling spectacle.
Since the still officially independent Kingdom of Othmaliz was this afternoon's host, the Othmalizi Army's marching band formed the parade's vanguard. A troop of the Seneschal's Own Dragoons followed, and was followed in turn by a company of Imperial Ternathian Marines, then a company of Uromathian infantry, one of Farnalian cavalry, and on and on.
The 'floats' were interspersed among the marching and mounted formations, and the imperial family's was actually rather near the end of the entire procession. In fact, despite the ruler-straightness of Emperor Daerha Boulevard, the official parade route, Kinlafia (whose vision really was as good as he'd told Alazon it was) found it almost impossible to make out details of the leading formations simply because of the sheer distance involved.
The floats also varied widely in size. Kinlafia's was one of the smallest; the imperial family's was undoubtedly the largest. Where his had only two wheels and was towed by a single pair of Shikowrs, the Emperor's float was a six-wheeled, articulated wagon towed by an entire six-horse team of tall, black Chinthai. The massive draft animals, descended from ancient heavy cavalry mounts, were taller at the shoulder than Kinlafia, and their flowing manes and tails had been elaborately braided and threaded with silken streamers in the green and gold of the House of Calirath.
Zindel chan Calirath himself sat on a throne which rose considerably higher than Kinlafia's, although the broader vehicle at its base promised greater stability. At least, Kinlafia certainly hoped it did. The thought of watching the future Emperor of Sharona plunge to his doom from a parade float left a little something to be desired from a public relations viewpoint.
Empress Varena sat beside him, on an equally elevated throne, and all three of their daughters were grouped around them on thrones of their own. It was fairly obvious from where Kinlafia sat that young Anbessa wasn't exactly enthralled, but it was equally obvious that her mother had 'reasoned' with her to good effect. Razial, on the other hand, seemed excited, eager for the spectacle to begin.
And then there was Andrin. Kinlafia gazed at her for several seconds, trying to gauge her emotions from the set of her shoulders, the angle of her head. He couldn't. And yet, he could.
He grimaced and shook his own head. Was he really interpreting her emotions correctly? Or did he just think he was? How much of what he thought she was feeling was real, and how much was simply an echo of that devastating moment in which he had shared the Emperor's Glimpse?
No one could claim that your life's been exactly boring for the last two or three months, Darcel, he told himself. But the last thirty-six hours have to have established a new all-time record, even for you. A
private audience with the Emperor, Alazon, an invitation to a quiet little supper with the entire imperial family, and then Her Imperial Highness Grand Princess Andrin.
It didn't seem possible. Still, at least it had all come at him so quickly he hadn't really had time to come to grips with it. That was good, because he rather suspected that when he finally did have the opportunity to sit down and think about it, it was going to scare the holy living hell out of him. It was one thing to think about running for office, about the probably mundane career of a mere Parliamentary Representative. It was quite another to discover that he-Darcel Kinlafia, from a sleepy little university town in the pampas of New Farnal-had a fate which was somehow bound up with that of the heirsecondary to the Winged Crown of Ternathia … and now of all Sharona.
Somehow, he didn't think his life was ever going to be 'boring' again.
