years despite the honesty owed a water brother. «Mmm, thirtyish, give or take a year.»
Mrs. Paiwonski chortled. «That's one bonus of the True Faith, my dears! Jill hon, I'm crowding fifty.»
«You don't look it!»
«That's what Happiness does, dearie. After my first kid, I let my figure go to pot — they invented the word “broad” just for me. My belly looked like six months gone. My busts hung down — and I've never had 'em lifted. You can see for yourself — sure, a good surgeon doesn't leave a scar … but on me it would show, dear; it would chop holes in two pictures.
«Then I seen the light! Nope, not exercise, not diet — I eat like a pig. Happiness, dear. Perfect Happiness in the Lord through the help of Blessed Foster.»
«It's amazing,» said Jill. Aunt Patty certainly had not dieted nor exercised during the time she had known her, and Jill knew what was excised in breast-lifting; those tatoos had never known a knife.
Mike assumed that Pat had learned to think her body as she wished it, whether she attributed it to Foster or not. He was teaching this control to Jill, but she would have to perfect her knowledge of Martian before it could be perfect. No hurry, waiting would do it. Pat went on:
«I wanted you to see what Faith can do. But the real change is inside. Happiness. The good Lord knows I'm not gifted with tongues but I'll try to tell you. First you've got to realize that all other so-called churches are traps of the Devil. Our dear Jesus preached the True Faith, so Foster said and I truly believe. But in the Dark Ages his words were twisted and changed until Jesus wouldn't recognize 'em. So Foster was sent to proclaim a New Revelation and make it clear again.»
Patricia Paiwonski pointed her finger and suddenly was a priestess clothed in holy dignity and mystic symbols. «God wants us to be Happy. He filled the world with things to make us Happy. Would God let grape juice turn to wine if He didn't want us to drink and be joyful? He could let it stay grape juice … or turn it into vinegar that nobody could get a giggle out of. Ain't that
She paused. «Fill 'er up again, honey; preaching is thirsty work — not much ginger ale; that's good rye. And that ain't all. If God didn't want women to be looked at, He would have made 'em ugly — that's reasonable, isn't it? God isn't a cheat; He set up the game Himself — He wouldn't rig it so that the marks can't win, like a flat joint wheel in a town with a fix on. He wouldn't send anybody to Hell for losing in a crooked game.
«All right! God wants us to be Happy and He told us how: “Love one another”! Love a snake if the poor thing needs love. Love thy neighbor … and the back of your hand only to Satan's corruptors who want to lead you away from the appointed path and down into the pit. And by “love” He didn't mean namby pamby old-maid love that's scared to look up from a hymn book for fear of seeing a temptation of the flesh. If God hated flesh,
«Of course that don't mean to peddle it any more than a bottle of rye means I gotta get fighting drunk and clobber a cop. You can't sell love and you can't buy Happiness, no price tags on either… and if you think there is, the way to Hell lies open. But if you give with an open heart and receive what God has an unlimited supply of, the Devil can't touch you. Money?» She looked at Jill. «Hon, would you do that water-sharing thing with somebody, say for a million dollars? Make it ten million, tax free.»
«Of course not.» («
(«
«You see, dearie? I knew love was in that water. You're seekers, very near the light. But since you two, from the love that is in you, did “share water and grow closer”, as Michael says, I can tell you things I couldn't ordinarily tell a seeker — »
The Reverend Foster, self-ordained-or ordained by God, depending on authority cited — had an instinct for the pulse of his times stronger than that of a skilled carnie sizing up a mark. The culture known as «America» had a split personality throughout its history. Its laws were puritanical; its covert behavior tended to be Rabelaisian; its major religions were Apollonian; its revivals were almost Dionysian. In the twentieth century (Terran Christian Era) nowhere on Earth was sex so vigorously suppressed — and nowhere was there such deep interest in it.
Foster had in common with every great religious leader of that planet two traits: he had an extremely magnetic personality, and sexually he did not fall near the human norm. On Earth great religious leaders were always either celibate or the antithesis. Foster was not celibate.
Nor were his wives and priestesses — the clincher for rebirth under the New Revelation included a ritual uniquely suited for growing closer.
In Terran history, many cults had used the same technique — but not on a major scale in America before Foster's time. Foster was run out of town more than once before he perfected a method that permitted him to expand his capric cult. He borrowed from Freemasonry, Catholicism, the Communist Party, and Madison Avenue just as he borrowed from earlier scriptures in composing his New Revelation. He sugar-coated it all as a return to primitive Christianity. He set up an outer church which anybody could attend. Then there was a middle church, which to outward appearance was «The Church of the New Revelation,» the happy saved, who paid tithes, enjoyed all benefits of the church's ever-widening business tie-ins, and whooped it up in an endless carnival of Happiness, Happiness, Happiness! Their sins were forgiven-and very little was sinful as long as they supported their church, dealt honestly with fellow Fosterites, condemned sinners, and stayed Happy. The New Revelation did not specifically encourage lechery, but it got quite mystical in discussing sexual conduct.
The middle church supplied shock troops. Foster borrowed a trick from early-twentieth-century Wobblies; if a community tried to suppress a Fosterite movement, Fosterites converged on that town until neither jails nor cops could handle them-cops had ribs kicked in and jails were smashed.
If a prosecutor was rash enough to push an indictment, it was impossible to make it stick. Foster (after learning under fire) saw to it that prosecutions were persecution under the letter of the law; no conviction of a Fosterite
Inside the overt church was the Inner Church — a hard core of fully dedicated who made up the priesthood, the lay leaders, all keepers of keys and makers of policy. They were «reborn,» beyond sin, certain of heaven, and sole celebrants of the inner mysteries.
Foster selected these with great care, personally until the operation got too big. He looked for men like himself and for women like his priestess-wives — dynamic, utterly convinced, stubborn, and free (or able to be freed, once guilt and insecurity were purged) of jealousy in its most human meaning — and all of them potential satyrs and nymphs, as the secret church was that Dionysian cult that America had lacked and for which there was enormous potential market.
He was most cautious — if candidates were married, it had to be both spouses. Unmarried candidates had to be sexually attractive and aggressive — and he impressed on his priests that males must equal or exceed in number the females. Nowhere was it recorded that Foster studied earlier, similar cults in America — but he knew or sensed that most such had foundered because possessive concupiscence of their priests led to jealousy. Foster never made this error; not once did he keep a woman to himself, not even those he married.
Nor was he too eager in expanding his core group; the middle church offered plenty to slake the milder needs of the masses. If a revival produced two couples capable of «Heavenly Marriage» Foster was content. If it produced none, he let the seeds grow and sent in a salted priest and priestess to nurture them.
So far as possible, he tested candidate couples himself, with a priestess. Since such a couple was already «saved» insofar as the middle church was concerned, he ran little risk — none with the woman and he always sized up the man before letting his priestess go ahead.
