certain power, a sustaining satisfaction, a daily stimulus, that led her on to daily effort, and in time to some success in circumstance or character, which was worth all the patience, hope, and labor of her life.
Fanny was just then in the mood to feel the beauty of this, for the sincerest emotion she had ever known was beginning to make her dissatisfied with herself, and the aimless life she led. 'Men must respect such girls as these,' she thought; 'yes, and love them too, for in spite of their independence, they are womanly. I wish I had a talent to live for, if it would do as much for me as it does for them. It is this sort of thing that is improving Polly, that makes her society interesting to Sydney, and herself so dear to every one.
Money can't buy these things for me, and I want them very much.'
As these thoughts were passing through her mind, Fanny was hearing all sorts of topics discussed with feminine enthusiasm and frankness. Art, morals, politics, society, books, religion, housekeeping, dress, and economy, for the minds and tongues roved from subject to subject with youthful rapidity, and seemed to get something from the dryest and the dullest.
'How does the new book come on?' asked Polly, sucking her orange in public with a composure which would have scandalized the good ladies of 'Cranford.'
'Better than it deserves. My children, beware of popularity; it is a delusion and a snare; it puffeth up the heart of man, and especially of woman; it blindeth the eyes to faults; it exalteth unduly the humble powers of the victim; it is apt to be capricious, and just as one gets to liking the taste of this intoxicating draught, it suddenly faileth, and one is left gasping, like a fish out of water,' and Kate emphasized her speech by spearing a sardine with a penknife, and eating it with a groan.
'It won't hurt you much, I guess; you have worked and waited so long, a large dose will do you good,' said Rebecca, giving her a generous spoonful of jam, as if eager to add as much sweetness as possible to a life that had not been an easy one.
'When are you and Becky going to dissolve partnership?' asked Polly, eager for news of all.
'Never! George knows he can't have one without the other, and has not suggested such a thing as parting us. There is always room in my house for Becky, and she lets me do as she would if she was in my place,' answered Bess, with a look which her friend answered by a smile.
'The lover won't separate this pair of friends, you see,' whispered Polly to Fan. 'Bess is to be married in the spring, and Becky is to live with her.'
'By the way, Polly, I 've got some tickets for you. People are always sending me such things, and as I don't care for them, I 'm glad to make them over to you young and giddy infants. There are passes for the statuary exhibition, Becky shall have those, here are the concert tickets for you, my musical girl; and that is for a course of lectures on literature, which I 'll keep for myself.'
As Kate dealt out the colored cards to the grateful girls, Fanny took a good look at her, wondering if the time would ever come when women could earn a little money and success, without paying such a heavy price for them; for Kate looked sick, tired, and too early old. Then her eye went to the unfinished statue, and she said, impulsively, 'I hope you 'll put that in marble, and show us what we ought to be.'
'I wish I could!' And an intense desire shone in Rebecca's face, as she saw her faulty work, and felt how fair her model was.
For a minute, the five young women sat silent looking up at the beautiful, strong figure before them, each longing to see it done, and each unconscious that she was helping, by her individual effort and experience, to bring the day when their noblest ideal of womanhood should be embodied in flesh and blood, not clay.
The city bells rung one, and Polly started up.
'I must go, for I promised a neighbor of mine a lesson at two.'
'I thought this was a holiday,' said Fanny.
'So it is, but this is a little labor of love, and does n't spoil the day at all. The child has talent, loves music, and needs help. I can't give her money, but I can teach her; so I do, and she is the most promising pupil I have. Help one another, is part of the religion of our sisterhood, Fan.'
'I must put you in a story, Polly. I want a heroine, and you will do,' said Kate.
'Me! why, there never was such a humdrum, unromantic thing as I am,' cried Polly, amazed.
'I 've booked you, nevertheless, so in you go; but you may add as much romance as you like, it 's time you did.'
'I 'm ready for it when it comes, but it can't be forced, you know,' and Polly blushed and smiled as if some little spice of that delightful thing had stolen into her life, for all its prosaic seeming.
Fanny was amused to see that the girls did not kiss at parting, but shook hands in a quiet, friendly fashion, looking at one another with eyes that said more than the most
'gushing' words.
'I like your friends very much, Polly. I was afraid I should find them mannish and rough, or sentimental and conceited. But they are simple, sensible creatures, full of talent, and all sorts of fine things. I admire and respect them, and want to go again, if I may.'
'Oh, Fan, I am so glad! I hoped you 'd like them, I knew they 'd do you good, and I 'll take you any time, for you stood the test better than I expected. Becky asked me to bring you again, and she seldom does that for fashionable young ladies, let me tell you.'
'I want to be ever so much better, and I think you and they might show me how,' said Fanny, with a traitorous tremble in her voice.
'We 'll show you the sunny side of poverty and work, and that is a useful lesson for any one, Miss Mills says,' answered Polly, hoping that Fan would learn how much the poor can teach the rich, and what helpful friends girls may be to one another.
14. Nipped In The Bud
ON the evening of Fan's visit, Polly sat down before her fire with a resolute and thoughtful aspect. She pulled her hair down, turned her skirt back, put her feet on the fender, and took Puttel into her lap, all of which arrangements signified that something very important had got to be thought over and settled. Polly did not soliloquize aloud, as heroines on the stage and in books have a way of doing, but the conversation she held with herself was very much like this: 'I 'm afraid there is something in it. I 've tried to think it 's nothing but vanity or imagination, yet I can't help seeing a difference, and feeling as if I ought not to pretend that I don't. I know it 's considered proper for girls to shut their eyes and let things come to a crisis no matter how much mischief is done.
