... No, not a leper—BEPPO. B for bdellium, E for eiderdown, P for psychology, P for pneumonia, O for a muse of fire that would ascend the brightest heaven of ... I beg your pardon? . . . You were called up and told I was in trouble? . . . Someone's been pulling your leg, Claud. I'm at peace with the world. . . . Whassat? . . . Why, sure. I was just going to bed, but I guess I can stay up a few minutes longer. Will you be bringing your own gum? . . . Right-ho. . . .'
He listened for a moment longer; and then he hung up the receiver and turned to Pat.
'Claud's coming right along,' he said gleefully, and the laughter was lifting in his voice. 'We're not to try to get away, because he'll have an armed guard at every sea and air port in the British Isles ten minutes after he gets here and finds we've done a bunk. Which will be tremendous fun for all concerned. . . . And now, get through to Beppo as fast as you can spin the dial, old sweetheart, while I sprint upstairs and change my shirt—for there's going to be a great day!'
Chapter X
Chief Inspector Claud Eustace Teal fixed his pudgy hands in the belt of his overcoat, and levelled his unfriendly gaze on the superbly elegant young man who lounged against the table in front of him.
'So that message I had was a fake, was it?' he snarled.
'It must have been, Claud.' Teal nodded fatly.
'Perhaps it was,' he said. 'But I went to the address it gave me—and what do you think I found?'
'The Shah of Persia playing ludo,' hazarded Simon Templar intelligently; and the detective glowered.
'In the cellar I found a nigger tied up with the whip that had beaten half the hide off his back. Outside, there was a white man with a fractured skull—he's gone to hospital as well. In a room upstairs there was another man laid out with a broken jaw, and a fourth man in the same room—dead.'
The Saint raised his eyebrows.
'But, my dear old sturgeon!' he protested reasonably; 'what on earth do you think I am? A sort of human earthquake?'
'Both the nigger and the man with the broken jaw,' Teal continued stonily, 'gave me a description of the man responsible, and it fits you like a glove. The man with the broken jaw also added the description of the woman who couldn't be distinguished apart from Miss Holm.'
'Then we obviously have doubles, Claud.'
'He also heard the woman say: 'Where is the Saint?' '
Simon frowned.
'That's certainly odd,' he admitted. 'Where did you say this was?'
'You know darned well where it was! And I'll tell you some more. Just as I got there in the police car, a man and a woman dashed out of the house and got away. And who do you suppose they looked like?'
'The same doubles, obviously,' said the Saint with great brilliance.
'And just one block away from that house we found a blue saloon Hirondel, which the two people I saw would have got away in if they'd had time to reach it. The number of it was ZX1257. Is that the number of your car?'
The Saint sat up.
'Claud, you're a blessing in disguise! That certainly is my car—and I was thinking I'd lost her! Pinched outside May Fair only yesterday afternoon, she was, in broad daylight. I was meaning to ring up Vine Street before, but what with one thing and another ——'
Teal drew a deep breath—and then he exploded.
'Now would you like to know what I think of your defence?' he blurted out, in a boiling gust of righteous wrath. And he went on without waiting for encouragement. 'I think it's the most weak-kneed tangle of moonshine I've ever had to listen to in my life. I think it's so drivelling that if any jury will listen to it for ten minutes. I'll walk right out of the court and have myself certified, I've got two men who'll swear to you on their dying oaths, and another one to put beside them if he recovers, and I know what I saw myself and what the men who were with me saw; and I think everything you've got to say is so maudlin that I'm going to take you straight back to Scotland Yard with me and have it put in writing before we lock you up. I think I've landed you at last, Mr. Saint, and after what you said to me this morning I'm damned glad I've done it.'
The Saint took out his cigarette-case and flopped off the table into an armchair, sprawling one long leg comfortably over the arm.
