another, more populous sector afterward. Second, I can sign you on for shares to conn Valkyrie after the flap is over. However, that would involve sitting on a planet until this whole thing’s over, and the possibility that I might find and sign on another Astrogator in the meantime.
“Finally, I can sign you on for shares now, which means you’d conn Valkyrie from now on. While we’re in the Viceroy's service, you’d draw Lieutenant Commander's pay, and when it’s over, you’d revert to the usual shares.”
She’d listened carefully, and now she nodded soberly. Gods! She was spectacular looking. Now, she reached into the small bag she carried, and produced her logbook. “I think you’ll see my qualifications are excellent,” she said.
I ran through the entries. She was well qualified. After excelling in Astrogator training, she’d served on a laundry list of ship types. Last on the list was a Beta class freighter, the one she’d left on Gamma. The Captain’s evaluation entries were carefully neutral where they weren’t complimentary. The same seemed true of most of the entries throughout her ten-year career.
“Okay,” I said finally. “Now tell me what’s wrong with you.”
“What?” That had shaken her. “What do you mean?”
“I’ve seen and written enough of these evaluations to know when something is being very carefully not said. Is it that you’re Frejan?”
“No!” She exclaimed. Then, looking abashed. “I… I mean, you know about Freja?”
I shrugged. “I’ve been there. Once.”
She nodded uncomfortably. “And you didn’t enjoy your visit. Well, you are a bit pale… But, no, that wasn’t the problem. At least, I don’t think I’m color-conscious. It’s just… well…' finally the wall of reserve broke down. “If you must know, I get tired of fighting off captains and crewmembers who think they’re the universe’s gift to women. That’s why I had to leave my last ship ‘way out here. The Captain had about six hands, and thought that command of the ship gave him command of the crew!” It came out in a rush. Obviously, it had been building for a long time. “Honestly, Captain… uh… Commodore, if an Astrogator is what you’re looking for, I’m an excellent one. If you’re looking for a bedmate or someone to pass the time with, I’m not what you want.'
I nodded. Time for a change of subject. “So,” I asked, “What’s a nice Frejan girl like you doing in a place like this?”
She burst into laughter. “I told you… Oh, you mean, why would a Firster leave Freja to wander around the universe on freighters?” I nodded and she shrugged, creating serious distractions for me.
“Actually, it’s all I ever wanted to do. Sure, I could have sat around my family’s stead, and married some other Firster and had a bunch of Firster kids. But I wanted more. I wanted to see other worlds, other ways. Everybody told me I was crazy, but I studied and studied, and got into the Astrogator’s Academy.” She smiled wryly. “That was an experience! The first time I came into contact with the fact that almost everybody was a paleskin! It was… it was hard to deal with, at first. But I did it!” Her voice firmed up. “I did it,” she repeated grimly. “I made myself one of the best Astrogators in space. And if you’ll leave me alone, I’ll be that good aboard your ship!”
“I’m not too pale,” I said quietly. “Our Engineer, Hari Carlon, is paler than I am. Jax… well, you’ve met Jax. He’s not quite as pale as I am.”
“I’ve met… Oh! You must mean the puppy outside!” She grinned, but she was obviously trying to avoid the subject. I remained silent, and finally she sighed. “Captain, I won’t try to lie to you. You’ve been to Freja. You know how I’ve been raised to respond to pale skin. I find it… well, repulsive. That’s one reason I’ve had so much trouble. The idea of that pale, fish belly flesh touching mine…” she shuddered. “But I’ll say again, if you and the others will leave me alone, we can get along fine.”
I shook my head. “I don’t know, Mistress Fjolking. A four-person crew is too small to accommodate isolation, voluntary or not. Frankly, I’m not as concerned about others bothering you as I am about you bothering others.
“Yes, you’re a gorgeous, exotic woman. But I’m too old to be letching after someone who’s disgusted by me. Hari… well, Hari wouldn’t be interested unless you had an engine. As for Jax, I’m sure you could handle a case of puppy love; you’ve had to handle worse. But I won’t subject myself and my friends to a crewmember who regards them as inferior, or treats them that way.”
She frowned. “I don't…”
I interrupted her. “Yes, you do. I could see it in your attitude toward Jax when he showed you in. You’ve tried to control it with me, but it’s there. For instance, you’ve used the term “paleskin.” Most people who haven’t been to Freja wouldn't notice. However, I’m well aware that to Frejans it’s an insult; and I suspect you use it as a way to exploit their ignorance. Poor paleskins, too stupid to know when they're being insulted.” I shook my head. “If you’ve managed to hang onto those prejudices for ten years, there’s not much chance you’ll ever get rid of them.
“I need an Astrogator very badly, both for the counter-coup operation and as a crewmember afterward. But I don’t think I can use you. A crewmember that’s disgusted by her mates… well…” I shook my head.
The result of my refusal of her services startled me. Those magnificent shoulders drooped, the gorgeous head sagged. She sighed deeply, and I could tell she was fighting off tears.
After a long moment, she raised her head, and her eyes met mine. They were proud, those eyes. She’d been battered, as much by her own prejudices as by others’ lechery; but she was strong, and she wasn’t giving up. For the first time, something besides Ursulas Fjolking’s remarkable appearance impressed me.
“Captain,” she said quietly, “I need a berth as badly as you need an Astrogator. I’ve never thought of myself as being prejudiced, but maybe I just can’t see it. However, since you seem to think that I am, perhaps you’ll understand how hard it is for me to say this: Please, Captain! Please sign me on. You’re my only chance to get off the rim and back to civilization!”
I thought for a moment that she was going to break down, but then she straightened. “You’re a trader, Captain. I’ll offer you a deal. Sign me on for the duration of the emergency on salary. When it’s over, if you’re not satisfied, I’ll sign off with no argument. If you are satisfied, you sign me on permanently.”
I shook my head. “Mistress Fjolking, I do not doubt your abilities as an Astrogator; your log book shows you to be very good. It’s your ability to fit into a crew that I doubt.' The shoulders sagged minutely, but for the most part, she controlled her chagrin. I sighed.
I told myself I was an old softy and a fraud.
“All right, Mistress. Fjolking,” I began, “I’ll give you a single chance. I know that a woman as er… remarkable in appearance as you has to constantly fight off horny males; and I know that sometimes it isn’t easy. But I also know that anyone I sign onto a crew will take ‘no’ for an answer, or else.”
“But the fact that they pursue you is not a mark of inferiority. Rather, consider it a mark of excellent judgment. I will sign you on for the duration. For your part, I’ll expect you to try to fit into the crew, not isolate yourself. If you force yourself to deal with the others on a regular basis, I think you may find your prejudices hard to maintain.”
“During this military dustup, we’ll probably have up to several dozen extra crewmen aboard. I give you my word that I’ll protect you from them, if necessary. In exchange, you will force yourself to mingle with them, be friendly with them. I think you may find them worth knowing, despite their skin color.”
“If, after this coup thing is over, I’m satisfied with your relationships with the crew, I’ll sign you on permanently. If not, I’ll at least promise you a lift inward. Oh, by the way, the extra crew will be rimworlders. I’d watch those comments about getting back to civilization; you see, they consider the rim civilization.”
Her control broke, and tears coursed down those black velvet cheeks unheeded. It was all I could do to keep from taking her into my arms and wiping them off myself. She ignored them.
“Thank you, Captain,” she said with quiet dignity. “I’ll accept your offer. And I’ll do my best to become part of your crew. I hope you’ll be patient with me, and understand the difference between showing bias and fending off a pass.'
I grinned. We were beginning to understand each other. “I understand the difference, Mistress Fjolking. I’ve been fended off by experts.”
Her answering smile was both genuine and blindingly beautiful. “I doubt that, Captain!” I was glad to see her sense of humor resurfacing.
I called Jax back into the office, introduced them, and told him to escort Suli out to the shipyard and turn her over to Hari. Jax barely heard a word. His eyes never left Suli. He tripped over his own feet three times before he could usher her out of the office. On her way out, she glanced at me with one of those blinding smiles and winked. I
