a gesture that caught me entirely off guard.
It made me feel like my mother. My mother, who would have scolded me without mercy at finding me in the sun without a parasol. I ground my teeth and sighed, keeping my eyes open only so that I would not trip as I was walking. Had I unwittingly entered a new stage in my life? Unwitting was perhaps not the correct word, as I’d known marriage would inevitably lead to it. But the reality—if reality it was—struck me hard. I was short of breath by the time I reached the gates of the palace and grateful for the glass of cold, tart cherry juice Roxelana offered me when I met her in a sitting room in the harem.
“I would be more comfortable if we discussed this somewhere private,” she said, glancing in the direction of the other women, gathered in small groups scattered around the large chamber, which, like the rest of Yıldız, was furnished in Western European mode. The concubines might have been debutantes chatting at a garden party in London. So much for the exotic.
“It’s important now that no one thinks we’re skulking off to talk alone,” I said. “We can’t aff ord to draw any attention to ourselves.”
“I understand, but it makes me nervous.”
“So you’ve opportunity for an excursion?” I asked.
“Tuesday. A group is going into the city to shop at the Grand Bazaar.”
Visions of opportunity flew through my head. The chaos of the bazaar would make it simpler than I could have hoped for Roxelana to vanish. “This is perfect. The bazaar—”
“I won’t be in the bazaar itself. We go to the sultan’s private section of the Nuruosmaniye Mosque, next to the bazaar. The merchants give their goods to the eunuchs, who in turn show them to us.”
“Will there be opportunity to escape from the building?” I asked.
“There must be,” she said. “But I’ve never before had occasion to consider it.”
“I shall go look this afternoon and come back to you tomorrow. Do not tell anyone of this—not even Jemal.”
“I promise.” Her eyes were dark, serious. “Is it true they’ve arrested the man who killed Ceyden?”
“Not yet,” I said. “A suspect is being apprehended, but he’d fled before the police came for him.”
“There—there are rumors it is an Englishman.”
“Yes, I’m afraid so.”
“Will they find him?”
“My husband’s looking for him, and Colin never fails. He’ll be found, don’t worry.”
“I’ve heard it said they seek the wrong man. Do you think—” She stopped, looked out the window, then back at me with a smile that could have charmed Alexander into handing Greece over to the Persians. “I’m excited about Tuesday,” she said, her voice louder now. “I’m told we shall see fabric more beautiful than any made in history. I want at least four new dresses.”
My reconnaissance at Nuruosmaniye was fruitful. I was able, by pressing the right amount of money into the right hands, to be admitted to the sultan’s lodge, pleading that an enthusiastic tourist not be denied the pleasure of seeing the space. A partition had been set up to shield the ladies of the harem, behind which, Roxelana had told me, they would be measured for their dresses. Wooden grilles covered the windows, and I had to determine whether they could be opened with ease. The caretaker who’d let me in was staying close to me, his eyes darting to the door every time he heard a noise, as if he feared Abdül Hamit would come in unannounced and find me violating his room.
I slipped into the ladies’ section and fell to my knees, hoping that if he thought I were praying, he would leave me in peace. He stood at the opening of the screen, watching me; perhaps my effort was not sincere enough. I closed my eyes, pressed my hands together, and murmured an “Our Father” under my breath. Even without looking, I could feel he was still there. I tried to summon the focused energy I’d felt in the Blue Mosque, not believing it would come, surprised when it did. All of my fears, my worries, were so close to my skin that it took almost nothing to coax them to surface. I remembered the sounds of my dear aunt’s dying cries, then imagined Ivy’s voice replacing hers, then mine. I pictured Colin standing over me, his face fading, and tears streamed down my cheeks.
I looked up, and as I met the caretaker’s eyes, he turned his back, blushing to his fingertips, then walked away from where I knelt and stood sentry in the main doorway to the building, his back to the interior. Fortunate and desired though this outcome was, I found that I could not readily cast away the emotions I’d summoned. Sinking farther down, dropping my head onto my clasped hands, I prayed as I had before, this time not undercutting my bargain: me for Ivy.
Finished—and shaking—I struggled to my feet and went to the windows, inspecting the grilles. They were held in place with latches, like shutters. Checking over my shoulder to ensure I was not being watched, I opened one. A simple task. Even the hinges, smooth-moving and silent, cooperated. Shooting another glance behind me, I tried to open the window. This took more effort, and I nearly lost my balance trying to push the sash, but eventually I managed. The drop to the ground was not terribly far and would set a person in a gallery that led from outside to the mosque.
I closed the window, but not fully, leaving enough room for me to slip my hand in and open it from outside. It was not the best plan, but I saw no other immediate way to escape the building. We would have to consider ways to improve upon it—distractions or something. I wished Colin were not gone. His suggestions would be invaluable, and he would be able to look at this space and see six safe but hidden routes to safety. Then I remembered that he would not approve of any of this in the least, and a sinking, twisting feeling in my stomach told me I would have to do this on my own and apologize after it was done.
After taking a careful study of the rest of the room, I thanked the caretaker, pressed another coin into his hand, and walked the perimeter of the building until I reached the part-open window. Margaret was tall enough that she’d be able to reach it without problem. I planned to give Roxelana a set of simple clothes and a veil that she could hide under her skirts, switching into them when she was supposed to be dressing after her measurements had been taken. She would wear traditional Turkish clothes to the mosque—garments that would not require assistance to put back on—and take them with her when she went, so that as the eunuchs searched for her, they would be looking for someone in the wrong outfit.
Once outside, she would have to make her way down the ramp that led to the building. The main risk she would take was being seen dropping from the window. The area outside was not crowded like the mosque’s main courtyard, but another diversion here would be helpful. If she could reach the Grand Bazaar without being noticed, she would have her freedom.
Cataloging ideas about how we could draw attention away from the building, I walked to meet Margaret, who was waiting for me outside the courtyard—we’d thought we’d make too much of an impression if we both went into the sultan’s lodge—and keeping her away meant she stood no chance of being recognized should I call on her to organize a distraction.
“Do we have a viable strategy?” she asked, leaning against a stone wall.
“The beginnings of one,” I said. “You will be instrumental in pulling it off.”
“I like that kind of plan.” We walked towards the Grand Bazaar, crossing through its entranceway and into the labyrinthine streets of stalls. “How will you get her out of the city?”
“I’ll hire a coach—closed—to meet us. We’ll figure out the best place. First, though, let’s decide where she should sit and wait for things to calm down.” Within minutes, we’d found a stall that sold baklava and tea. The chairs and tables set up in front were filled with both men and women, so it seemed as appropriate as any other spot. “I’ll wait for her here.”
“Veiled, of course,” Margaret said.
“I shall consider it. There’s nothing wrong with having a bit of fun in all this, is there?”
I went to Yıldız after finishing our work at the bazaar. Perestu had sent a note asking to see me. She was waiting in an elegant sitting room and was, for someone who had requested a meeting, surprisingly silent. Her quiet stillness teemed with elegance; even the way she breathed was full of grace, and I could not help staring at her.
“Your careful study of me unnerves me,” she said.
“Forgive me,” I said. “You are unlike any woman I’ve met before.”
She let out a long breath. “You are kind not to press me for the reason I wanted you to come today. I
