'So?'
'So it's the truth. That's all.'
Did he think I was a priest? I didn't care whether he was a nut or a crook or both or neither. I didn't want to hear his confession. He had had me brought here, presumably for a purpose, and now he was justifying himself to me.
No man has to justify himself to me. I have trouble enough justifying myself to myself.
'Matt, I got a problem.'
'You said they don't have anything on you.'
'This Portia Carr.She's saying I was shaking her down. I demanded a hundred a week or I was going to bust her.'
'But it's not true.'
'No, it's not.'
'So she can't prove it.'
'No. She can't prove shit.'
'Then what's the problem?'
'She also says I was fucking her.'
'Oh.'
'Yeah.I don't know if she can prove that part of it, but hell, it's the truth. It was no big deal, you know.
I was never a saint. Now it's all over the papers and there's this extortion bullshit, and all of a sudden I don't know whether I'm coming or going. My marriage is a little shaky to begin with, and all my wife needs is stories for her friends and family to read about how I'm shacking up with this Englishcunt .
You married, Matt?'
'I used to be.'
'Divorced?Any kids?'
'Two boys.'
'I got two girls and a boy.' He sipped his drink, ducked ash from his cigarette. 'I don't know, maybe you like being divorced. I don't want any part of it. And the extortion charge, that's breaking my balls.
I'm scared to leave this fucking apartment.'
'Whose place is it? I always thoughtFuhrmann lived in my neighborhood.'
'He's in the West Fifties. That your neighborhood?' I nodded.
'Well, this place is mine, Matt. I've had it a little over a year. I got the house out inForest Hills and I figured it'd be nice to have a place in town in case I needed one.'
'Who knows about this place?'
'Nobody.'He leaned over, stubbed out his cigarette. 'There's a story they tell about these politicians,'
he said. 'This one guy, the polls show he's in trouble, his opponent is wiping the floor with him. So his campaign manager says, 'Okay, what we'll do, we'll spread a story about him. We'll tell everybody he fucks pigs.' So the candidate asks if it's true, and the campaign manager says it's not. 'So we'll let him deny it,' he says. 'We'll let him deny it.' '
'I follow you.'
'Throw enough mud and some of it sticks. Some fucking cop is leaning on Portia, that's what's happening. He wants me to stop working withPrejanian and in return she'll drop the charges. That's what it's all about.'
'Do you know who's doing it?'
'No. But I can't break it off withAbner . And I want those charges dropped. They can't do anything to me in court, but that's not the point.
Even without going to court they'll have a departmental investigation.Except they won't be investigating a damn thing because they already know what conclusion they want to come up with. They'll suspend me immediately and they'll wind up kicking me out of the department.'
'I thought you resigned.'
He shook his head. 'Why would I resign, for Christ's sake? I got better than twelve years, close to thirteen. Why would I quit now? I took a leave of absence when I first decided to get in touch withPrejanian .
You can't be on active duty and play ball with the Special Prosecutor at the same time.
The department would have too many openings to shaft you. But I never even thought about resigning.
When this is over I expect to be back on the force.'
I looked at him. If he really meant that last sentence, then he was a whole lot stupider than he looked or acted. I didn't know his angle in helpingPrejanian , but I knew he was finished for life as far as the police department was concerned. He had turned himself into an untouchable and he would wear the caste mark as long as he lived. It didn't matter whether the investigation shook up the department or not. It didn't matter who was forced to put in for early retirement or who went to slam. None of that mattered. Every cop on the force, clean or dirty, straight or bent, would mark JeromeBroadfield lousy for the rest of his life.
And he had to know it. He'd been carrying a badge for over twelve years.
