were on the floor -where he had left them the night before, the belt buckled around the four wheel-drive gearshift.
'You okay?' the man asked, thrusting out his hand. 'I'm Stan Wilder.'
Joe shook it and said he was just fine. Joe guessed that Stan Wilder was in his late sixties and new to the area. His accent was Northeastern and his words came fast. He had perfect big teeth that he flashed as he talked. The faded blonde-gray mustache and beard that surrounded the man's mouth looked dull and washed out in comparison with his gleaming teeth.
'I was walking out to get the newspaper,' Stan Wilder nodded toward the red plastic Saddlestring Roundup box mounted on a Post at the end of his driveway 'when the hair on the back of my neck stood straight up. Then I looked over there'--Wilder pointed toward a new row of spindly aspen trees--'and saw the mountain lion stalking me. I'm not ashamed to say that I was about as scared as you were just a minute ago!' He clapped Joe on the back.
Joe stepped far enough away so that Stan Wilder couldn't do that again.
'How long ago did you see the mountain lion?' Joe asked. He chose not to reciprocate Stan Wilder's banter.
'Must have been about seven this morning.'
'Did you see him run off?'
Wilder laughed, throwing his head back showing his teeth again. Joe guessed that he must have been in sales and marketing before he retired and moved west to Elkhorn Ranches.
'Nope, but he saw me run right back into the house! That's when I got my weapon out and called you.'
'You didn't take any shots at him, did you?'
Somehow, Joe knew he had. Stan Wilder's face betrayed the answer. 'He was on my property, Warden,' Wilder explained. 'I popped a couple of caps. But I didn't hit him.'
Joe nodded. 'You ought to reconsider the next time you want to fire your pistol out here. The highway is just over the hill and there are construction workers framing a house in the next draw You could hit one of them and you could also hit one of Jim Finotta's cows. They graze fairly close to here.'
Stan Wilder snorted and rolled his eyes heavenward.
Joe walked over and checked the ground around the aspen trees. Because the trees had been planted just a few days before, the earth around them was still soft. A four-inch-long cat track was obvious and fresh near one of the trees.
'Big cat,' Joe said.
'Damn right,' Wilder agreed. 'I need him removed.'
Joe turned and sighed. 'Removed?'
'Damn right. I don't mind the antelope and the deer. I see them all the time. I paid for antelope and deer and access to the trout streams.
Finotta told me that elk sometimes come down this far and I'd like to see a few of them. That'd be added value.
'But I didn't pay for this,' he swept his hand toward his new house, 'to have mountain lions stalking me.'
Joe said it was unlikely that the lion was stalking him. He told Stan Wilder that he had never heard of a mountain lion actually stalking and attacking a full-grown man.
'What about those babies in Los Angeles?' Wilder asked aggressively 'Didn't a mountain lion come down from the mountains and kill some babies?'
Joe said he thought he remembered something about that story but the predator was a coyote and the circumstances were questionable.
'Well, I remember it being a mountain lion,' Stan Wilder said gruffly
'Look, Mr. Wilder, mountain lion sightings are rare. There's no doubt you saw one, but he didn't do any harm. Up until a year ago this was probably his range. These cats cover about two hundred miles. He was likely as surprised to see a big house and a lawn here as you were to see him. I know I was surprised to see this place out here.'
Stan Wilder told Joe that he had just heard a perfect load of bureaucratic bullshit.
'If he comes back can I shoot him?' Stan Wilder asked. 'I mean legally?'
Joe grudgingly said that yes, if the cat was actually close enough to do real harm, he could shoot him.
'But I would advise against it,' Joe cautioned.
'Whose side are you on here, Mr. Game Warden? The cougar's or mine?'
Joe didn't answer that question.
'That mountain lion better watch his step,' Stan Wilder cautioned, nodding his head toward the handgun in the garage. 'If you catch my drift.'
'Like I said, there are cars on the highway workers at other lots, and cows all around.'
Wilder snorted again.
'You should be aware, Mr. Wilder, that some of these cows have been known to explode,' Joe said soberly That got Wilder's attention.
'What in the hell are you talking about?' Wilder asked, trying to gauge Joe's demeanor to see if he was being made fun of.
