she gently rubbed Marlyn's back, calming her again. It was muffled from her face being in Kelly's shoulder, but I heard it clearly when Marlyn finally told her 'I am ashamed because I am jealous of Marilyn. She will know the pleasure of a man's touch and affection, and I won't. I have never been with a man, and I have never known the pleasures that the others told me they have had with each other, and with Dan. So I am jealous of Marilyn, my only family, because she will know these things, and I will not.'
Kelly turned her head to look at me as she continued to rub Marlyn's back. I didn't want to speak and disturb the bond Marlyn and Kelly had; so I mimed looking around for someone, gestured toward Marlyn, and raised my eyebrows in question. Kelly understood my actions: who was Marlyn looking/waiting for?
Going along with my silence, Kelly asked Marlyn 'Is it Dan that you want?'
Again, I could easily hear Marlyn's response: 'Yes.'
Kelly looked surprised, and asked 'Why don't you just tell him, then?'
'Because I am afraid.'
'Afraid of what?' Kelly asked.
'That he will say no. Or that I will not know what to do, and make him unhappy. Or that you or the others will be upset with me because he is yours. That I will be too afraid, and not be able to feel pleasure.'
All of the reasons she gave Kelly were things that Kelly knew how to deal with.
'Marlyn, I know Dan. If you wanted to make love with him, he would be happy to do that – as much or as little as you wanted. Don't you remember what all of us told you about him? That he refused us only until he was sure that we knew what we were asking? The only reason he did that was because all of us were so young. I know that if you were to ask him, he would be happy to do that for you, without question.'
Marlyn said something that I didn't quite catch, but Kelly apparently did when she said 'Yes, I am sure. I think Dan knows that you are a virgin. But even if he doesn't, all you have to do is tell him, and he will help you to learn what to do. The first time any of us were with him, we didn't know, either – but he taught us. Patiently and gently.'
Kelly then told her 'As for the rest of us, I think that you are forgetting something: we already share him with each other. And he is able to make all of us happy. He gives all of us more love than we know what to do with – and he still has plenty to give to other people. He is already giving you and Marilyn his love, and he still has enough for me and Jan and all the others. Do you really think that if he gave you even more of his love, it would hurt any of us? When we already love you and Marilyn so much?'
Another garbled comment from Marlyn, and Kelly responded by saying 'No, I don't think you have to be afraid. You know how kind and gentle he is.
You know how patient and understanding he is. You trust him not to hurt Marilyn; why would you think that you have to be afraid of him? Think again about what all of us have told you: he brought every single one of us pleasure – more pleasure than we thought was possible. All of us were nervous to be with him; but we trusted him, and he showed us that we were right to do that. I have been with Dan for over six years, and he has never, ever failed to bring me pleasure when we were together. If anything, sometimes he makes me TOO happy!'
Kelly finished by telling her 'Marlyn, there is nothing for you to be afraid about. If you have the courage to tell him what you want, he will do everything he can to show you what you have been wanting. And he will do it with the support of all of us, because we love him and we love you.'
I saw Marlyn's head start to come up, and quickly turned away, pretending that I hadn't heard a thing because I was too busy counting air molecules. I turned back to look at them only when I heard Marlyn's tentative 'Dan?'
When she looked at me, she must have seen the care and concern on my face, because she suddenly seemed to draw strength from inside. Her voice was strong and clear when she asked 'Dan, would you make love with me?'
'Marlyn, if that is what you want, then I would be happy to.' I answered, as sincerely as I could.
Though pleased, she was still a bit hesitant when she told me 'I have never been with a man before. I am a virgin, and I don't know anything about making love.'
I opened my arms to her, and with Kelly's encouragement, she came over to sit on my lap. I put my arms around her, chastely, before telling her 'You know the important part, already.'
She looked at me doubtfully, and I went on to tell her 'The important part about making love with someone is to love them first. When you have that, then the rest is easy.'
Hearing that, she visibly relaxed in my arms as she started smiling.
My eyes locked on hers, I told her 'Marlyn, this is your time. What we do, and how we do it, is up to you. You told me that you want us to make love. When the time comes, that is what we will do – IF you still want it then. If you change your mind, or don't want us to do that for any reason, then we won't. It is your choice, not mine. I had a vasectomy long before I met Kelly, so you don't have to worry that I will make you pregnant. We can use our bedroom, which has a larger bed, or yours – whichever you would prefer. If it would make you more comfortable, Kelly can stay with us; or if you want it to be just you and me, then she will not bother us. If you want it to be just us, then she can be with us later, if you want her to. This is your time, and it is you that decides for us.'
She could see, and hear, my sincerity as I told her those things; I could see as she relaxed even more, and got some of her confidence back.
She looked at Kelly shyly before telling us 'I would like it to be just me and Dan, first. But you have been so kind, Kelly, that I want to be with you, too – and find out what a woman's love is like.' she added, shyly.
Kelly just smiled, and told her 'That's fine, Marlyn. I understand. You and Dan have fun; when you want me, I'll be right here.'
Kelly's casual acceptance of her decision and obvious willingness for us to be together, boosted Marlyn's confidence even more; assuring her that she really was the decision maker on the matter.
Marlyn turned back to me, and I simply told her 'Whenever you are ready.'
To my surprise, she reached down to take my hand and press my palm against her breast over the dress she was wearing. She then looked into my eyes before saying 'I am ready now.'
I nodded my head in acceptance of her decision, and she stood up next to the couch. I stood up next to her, and took her hand. When I didn't move after several seconds, she realized that I was waiting for her. I could almost see it as the rest of her confidence fell into place before she led the two of us down the hall.
With only the briefest pause, she led us into 'her' bedroom. Neither Kelly nor I had been in it since her arrival; I was surprised to see how neat and organized she kept it.
After both of us were inside, she released my hand to close the door behind us; I could see as she debated whether or not to lock it – before choosing not to. I knew that Kelly would never know if it was locked, or not; it simply wouldn't occur to her to do anything where she would find out.
When Marlyn was back in front of me again, both of us just stood there for several moments, looking at each other – she, to see if I was going to be aggressive in any way; me, to let her know that I wasn't.
She finally spoke again, telling me 'I… I don't know what to do next.'
'Would you let me kiss you?' I asked.
She gave me a happy nod, and let me take her hand to lead her over to her bed (I figured the one with the stuffed animals was*probably*
Marilyn's). Marlyn seemed a bit apprehensive, at first; but I simply sat on the bed, and opened my arms in invitation for her to sit on my lap; she barely hesitated before doing so.
I looked at her for a couple of moments, and she gave me a shy smile in return. I carefully put my hands on her face, cupping it softly, and then guided her face to mine. I saw her eyes close, and kept mine open only long enough to make sure we didn't bump noses.
Our first kiss was soft, and gentle – and chaste. When it ended, she pulled back from me slightly, looking into my eyes to see what was there – and apparently found only the love and concern I felt for her, because she didn't hesitate to move toward me for another kiss. Our second kiss was as chaste as the first – but appreciably more emotional. When we parted lips again, I could see the tears in her eyes; but I could also see the happiness on her face, and knew that they were tears of joy.
Her face was still cupped in my hands, and I used my thumbs to brush away her tears as I smiled at her.
She quickly got control of herself, and when I'd brushed away the last of her tears, I slowly and deliberately put my arms around her waist – holding her loosely enough that she would know I wouldn't hurt her, but still tight enough that she would know they were there – and why.
