Another shrug.
“Don’t give me another one of them shrugs,” he said. “That birdbrain ex-wife of mine is a kidnapper. And you better tell me if you know anything.”
I had him wondering about the extent of my knowledge. Probably not smart, but definitely satisfying.
“I’ve changed my mind about wanting a drink,” I said to Lula and Kloughn.
“Okay by me,” Lula said. “I don’t like the atmosphere in this bar anyway.”
Soder took another look at Kloughn. “Hey, I remember you. You’re the jerk-off lawyer who represented Evelyn.”
Kloughn beamed. “You remember me? I didn’t think anyone would remember. Boy, how about that.”
“Evelyn got control of the kid because of you,” Soder said. “You made a big issue about this bar. You put my kid with a drugged-up moron, you incompetent fuck.”
“She didn’t look drugged-up to me,” Kloughn said. “Maybe a little… distracted.”
“How about if I distract my foot up your ass,” Soder said, making for the end of the long oak bar.
Lula shoved her hand into her big leather shoulder bag. “I got Mace in here, somewhere. I got a gun.”
I turned Kloughn around and pushed him toward the door. “
“Run for the car!”
Lula still had her head down, rummaging in her bag. “I
“Forget the gun!” I said to Lula. “Let’s just get out of here.”
“The hell,” Lula said. “This guy deserves to get shot. And I’d do it if I could just find my gun.”
Soder rounded the bar and charged after Kloughn. I stepped in front of Soder, and he gave me a two-handed shove.
“Hey, you can’t shove her like that,” Lula said. And she smacked Soder in the back of his head with her bag. He whirled around, and she hit him again, this time catching him in the face, knocking him back a couple feet.
“What?” Soder said, dazed and blinking, swaying slightly.
Two goons started at us from the other end of the bar, and half the room had guns drawn.
“Uh-oh,” Lula said. “Guess I left my gun in my other handbag.”
I grabbed Lula by the sleeve and gave her a yank toward the door, and we both took off running. I beeped the car open with my remote, we all jumped in, and I zoomed away.
“Soon as I find my gun, I’ve got a mind to go back there and pop a cap up his ass,” Lula said.
In all the time I’ve known Lula, I’ve never known her to pop a cap up anyone’s ass. Unjustified bravado was high on our list of bounty hunter talents.
“I need a day off,” I said. “I especially need a day without Bender.”
**********************
ONE OF THE good things about hamsters is that you can tell them anything. Hamsters are nonjudgmental as long as you feed them.
“I have no life,” I said to Rex. “How did it come to this? I used to be such an interesting person. I used to be fun. And now look at me. It’s two o’clock on a Sunday afternoon, and I’ve watched
I glanced over at the answering machine. Maybe it was broken. I lifted the phone receiver and got a dial tone. I pushed the message button and the voice told me I had no messages. Stupid invention.
