'Do we know her?'
'Nope. She lived in New Hope. But she's moved. She moved to South Carolina.
That's another reason I stopped playing. My cello teacher moved, and I didn't feel like finding a new cello teacher. So I gave the cello back to her. It was originally hers, anyway.' Sometimes I was really impressed with my ability to come up with this shit. Once I got going, it just rolled out of me. I could compose a whole parallel universe for myself in a matter of seconds. I glanced down at my watch. 'Look at the time! I'm late.'
I snatched a couple cookies off the plate on the kitchen table and ran through the house to the car. I jumped in the SUV and roared away. Next stop was Valerie. I didn't have any real reason to visit Valerie. It was just that I was her sister and her maid of honor and Val wasn't entirely together these days. I thought it wouldn't hurt to check on her once in a while until she made it through the wedding.
The first thing I noticed when I got to her house was the absence of Kloughn's car. Not surprising since this was a workday. Sort of surprising that he was able to get himself up and out on the road with a raging hangover.
'What?' Val yelled when she opened the door to me.
'I just stopped by to say hello.'
'Oh. Sorry I yelled at you. I'm having a problem with volume control. It turns out when you're starving to death you do a lot of yelling.'
'Where's Albert? I thought he'd still be in bed with a hangover.'
'He decided he was better off at the office. He couldn't stand the galloping and whinnying. You might want to see how he's doing. He left in his pajamas.'
'You know, Val, not everyone's cut out to have a big wedding. Maybe you should reconsider the eloping option.'
'I wish I'd never started this wedding thing,' Val wailed. 'What was I thinking?'
'It's not too late to bail.'
'It is. And I'm too chicken. Everybody's made all these plans!'
'Yeah, but it's your wedding. It shouldn't be some horrible stressful thing. It should be something you enjoy.' Not to mention, if Valerie eloped I wouldn't have to wear the hideous eggplant getup.
I left Valerie and drove to Kloughn's office. There was a CLOSED sign on his door and when I looked in the window I could see Kloughn was stretched out on the floor in his pajamas with a wet towel over his face. I didn't want to make him get up, so I tiptoed away and headed down Route 1 to the personal products plant. I parked in a visitor slot, ran in, and got a job application from the personnel office. I had no illusions of getting an office job here.
I had no references and few skills. I'd be lucky if I could get a job on the line. I'd bring the application back tomorrow and wait for a phone call for an interview.
I slid to a stop in front of Giovichinni's Market and didn't bother to call to check on Macaronis. I figured I had bigger problems than Macaronis. I was being stalked by a homicidal maniac. Spiro was officially over the edge.
I ran through the store gathering together some basic foods. Bread, cheese, Tastykakes, peanut butter, cereal, milk, Tastykakes, eggs, frozen pizza, Tastykakes, orange juice, apples, lunch meat, and Tastykakes. I checked out and muscled my way through the door with bags in my arms.
Ranger was leaning against the SUV, waiting for me. He pushed off, took the bags, and put them in the car. 'Looks like you're playing house,' he said.
'More like nurse. Morelli needs some help.'
'Is that your job application on the front seat?' Yep.
'Personal products plant?'
'It's halfway to New Brunswick. I'm hoping they won't have heard about me. That's Grandmas line, but it's true.'
'Babe,' Ranger said. He was smiling, but there was a quality to his voice that told me it wasn't actually funny. We both knew that my life wasn't going in the carefree direction I'd hoped for.
NINE
'I HAVE AN office position open,' Ranger said. 'Are you interested in working for Rangeman?'
'Oh great. A pity position.'
'If I gave you a pity position it wouldn't be in the office.'
This got a burst of laughter out of me because I knew he was taking a zing at my sex life with Morelli. For the most part, Ranger had a consistent personality.
He wasn't a guy who wasted a lot of unnecessary energy and effort. He moved and he spoke with an efficient ease that was more animal than human. And he didn't telegraph his emotions. Unless Ranger had his tongue in my mouth it was usually impossible to tell what he was thinking. But every now and then, Ranger would step out of the box, and like a little treat that was doled out on special occasions, Ranger would make an entirely outrageous sexual statement.
At least it would be outrageous coming from an ordinary guy . . . from Ranger it seemed on the mark.
'I didn't think you hired women,' I said to him. 'The only woman you have working for you is your housekeeper.'
'I hire people who have the skills I need. Right now I could use someone in the building who can do phone work and paperwork. You'd be an easy hire. You already know the drill. Nine to five, five days a week. You can discuss salary with my business manager. You should consider it. The garage is secure.
