Here's the thing about guns. I hate them. I don't even like them when they're not loaded. 'I'm in the middle of something,' I said. 'Maybe we could reschedule for some other time.' Like never.
'We're doing this now,' Ranger said. 'This is important. And I don't want to find your gun in your desk drawer when you leave. If you work for me, you carry a gun.'
'I don't have permission to carry concealed.'
Ranger shoved my chair with his foot and rolled me back from the computer.
'Then you carry exposed.'
'I can't do that. I'll feel like Annie Oakley.'
Ranger pulled me out of the chair. 'You'll figure it out. Get your gun. We have the range for an hour.'
I took the gun out of the desk drawer, shoved it into my sweatshirt pocket, and followed Ranger to the elevator. We exited into the garage and walked to the rear. Ranger unlocked the door to the range and switched the light on.
The room was windowless and appeared to stretch the length of the building. There were two lanes for shooters. Remote-controlled targets at the far end. Shelves and a thick bulletproof glass partition that separated the shooters
at the head of each lane.
'With a little effort you could turn this into a bowling alley,' I said to Ranger.
'This is more fun,' Ranger said. 'And I'm having a hard time seeing you in bowling shoes.'
'Its not fun. I don't like guns.'
'You don't have to like them, but if you work for me you have to feel comfortable with them and know how to use them and be safe.'
Ranger took two headsets and a box of ammo and put them on my shelf. 'We'll start with basics. You have a nine-millimeter Sig Sauer. It's a semiautomatic.'
Ranger removed the magazine, showed it to me, and shoved it back into the gun. 'Now you do it,' he said.
I removed the magazine and reloaded. I did it ten times. Ranger did a step-by-step demonstration on firing. He gave the gun back to me, and I went through the process ten times. I was nervous, and it felt stuffy in the narrow room, and I was starting to sweat. I put the gun on the shelf, and I took off Morelli's sweatshirt.
'Babe,' Ranger said. And he pulled his key fob out of his pocket and hit a button.
'What did you just do?' I asked him.
'I scrambled the security camera in this room. Hal will fall out of his seat upstairs if he sees you in this outfit.'
'You don't want to know the long story, but the short story is I wore it to annoy Morelli.'
'I'm in favor of anything that annoys Morelli,' Ranger said. He moved in close and looked down at me. 'This wouldn't be my first choice as a work uniform, but I like it.' He ran a finger across the slash of stomach not covered by clothing, and I felt heat rush into private places. He splayed his hand at my hip and turned his interest to my workout pants. 'I especially like these pants. What do you wear under them?'
And here's where I made my mistake. I was hot and flustered and a flip answer seemed in order. Problem was the answer that popped out of my mouth was a tad flirty.
'There are some things a man should find out for himself,' I said.
Ranger reached for the waistband on the spandex pants, and I shrieked and
jumped back.
'Babe,' Ranger said, smiling. I was amusing him, again.
I glanced at my watch. 'Actually, I need to leave the building for a while.'
'Looking for another job?'
'No. This is personal.'
Ranger pushed the button to unscramble the surveillance camera. 'Wear the sweatshirt when you're on deck in the control room.' 'Deal.'
A half hour later, I was idling across the street from Stiva's. The hearse and the flower cars were in place at the side entrance. Three black Town Cars lined up behind the flower cars. I sat and watched the casket come out.
Macaronis followed. The flower cars were already loaded. The cars slowly moved out and drove the short distance to the church. I saw no sign of Spiro. I followed at a distance and parked half a block from the church. I had a clear view of the parking lot and the front of the church. I settled back to wait. This would take a while. The Macaronis would want Mass. The parking lot was full and the surrounding streets were bumper-to-bumper cars.
The entire Burg had turned out.
An hour later, I was worrying about my cubicle sitting empty. I was getting paid to do computer searches, not hang out at funerals. And then just as I was thinking about leaving and returning to work, the doors to the church opened and people began to file out. I caught a glimpse of the casket being rolled out a side door to the waiting hearse. Engines caught up and down the street. Stiva's assistants were out, lining up cars, attaching flags to antennae.
I was intently watching the crowd at the church and jumped when Ranger rapped on my side window.
