'I do feel that way, ' she cried out.
'All you're doing is striking first.'
'And what does that mean? ' 'You're so certain I'll leave you, you're
taking action first and leaving me. Isn't that right? ' He wouldn't
give her time to answer, but plunged ahead. 'Well, I've got news for
you, baby. That isn't going to happen. I'm not going anywhere, and
neither are you. I meant what I said. It's forever, Jessie, and I
seem to recall you gave me the same promise.' She didn't believe she
could be any more miserable than she was at this very moment. Memory
served her well, and she knew that even the most fervent promises were
empty. He loved her now, yes, but in time he would change his mind.
'I don't want you to stay with me because of what happened. I asked
you for one single night, and you gave me that.'
'Are you going to thank me now? ' His tone suggested she not comply.
'It's time to go.
' 'You're trying my patience, ' he whispered.
He didn't say another word to her for almost an hour. He kept looking
back over his shoulder to make sure she was all right, and she noticed
that his expression grew more hostile with each glance.
She knew she had hurt him, but it was for the best to end it now. She
told herself she was simply protecting herself and her son, because if
she opened her heart to him, she would be giving him the power to
destroy her. She couldn't take that chance. Yet, thinking about life
without him made her miserable, and she didn't know what to do to stop
the ache. She hated being afraid, and loving Cole terrified her
because it meant she would have to trust him.
Why, oh, why, hadn't she considered all the ramifications before she
attacked the man? Because, she wanted to know what it felt like to be
loved. Dear God, what had she done?
'Jessie, we did it all wrong.' She stared at his back, her heart
already shattering, while she waited for him to tell her he had finally
come to his senses.
He didn't turn around as he explained, but took the lead down the last
slope that led into the town where they would catch the train.
'We had our wedding night before our wedding. We just did it
backwards, that's all. If there's time, we'll fix that when we get to
town.'
