she couldn't do it. She would feel too much guilt tomorrow.
Why did she have to be so uptight about sex? Why couldn't she be more nonchalant about the whole thing? Her girlfriends, most of them anyway, didn't think it was a big deal to hook up with a different guy every Saturday night. But Jordan didn't do that, and neither did Kate. Jordan used to say that she had too much respect for her body to rent it out to any guy for a night. Kate felt the same way. There had to be an emotional investment, didn't there? No, no, then there would be strings, wouldn't there? And she didn't want that, either. Kate knew she could come up with at least a hundred other reasons why she was so skittish, but maybe what it really boiled down to was that she was terrified of being hurt.
And that admission tipped the scales. It was definitely safer to abstain.
Now that she had made the decision, all she had to do was implement it. She was going to have to stop kissing him first, of course, but oh Lord, that was proving a difficult challenge. Dylan was an amazing kisser. He could give lessons. He took his time, savoring what he was doing, as he lazily explored her mouth with his tongue.
She wasn't sure when she crossed the line from being smart and sending him on his way to unbuttoning his shirt and kissing nearly every inch of his neck and chest. He was warm and hard and sexy. Her fingers gently traced the ragged scar on his left shoulder. The bullet had gone clear through, tearing tendon and muscle and just barely missing an artery.
Dylan grabbed her hand and wouldn't let her stroke him. He kissed her again, long and hard, and then tried to end it.
'Kate, we aren't going to do this.'
He wasn't sure if she heard him. She was nibbling on his ear-lobe, driving him nuts. Then she shifted on his lap, and his jeans suddenly felt three sizes too small. It was damned painful. He grabbed hold of her hips to keep her from wiggling again. His voice was ragged when he said, 'If we're going to stop, now's the time.'
'Yes, of course.'
She didn't resist when he lifted her off his lap. She stood next to the sofa and looked away as she tried to catch her breath. Kissing had never caused such a reaction before, but then she'd never kissed Dylan.
He also stood. They were toe to toe but he towered over her. He stared at the top of her head while he waited for her to look at him. His shirt was hanging out and was wide open, but he didn't bother to button it. His priority now was to get the hell out of the apartment before he did something he knew she would regret.
He had no business starting this. Granted, he had had the hots for Kate since the moment he'd met her. The woman was built, all right. Still, wanting and doing were two different things. Dylan loved women, and flirting with Kate was always fun. She might give others the appearance of being a sophisticated woman, but he saw through that facade. When it came to men and sex, she wasn't all that experienced.
He threaded his fingers through his hair. He was throbbing with his need to touch her. To feel her naked body underneath him… to taste the liquid heat… to hear her moans of pleasure… to…
'I've got to go.'
'Then go.' She reached out and grabbed hold of his shirt-tails. 'Unless you want to stay.' She stared into his eyes as she slowly slid her arms around his waist. The feel of his warm skin made her want to do crazy things.
For one night only. Like the commercial… a once in a lifetime deal… take it or leave it.
'Kate, listen to me. You know I want you, but…' He gently pushed her arms down.
'I know,' she whispered. 'This is a bad idea.' She pulled back, but her eyes were still looking up into his.
His mouth settled on hers, his tongue slowly penetrated and then began to stroke hers until she trembled in his arms. He couldn't seem to get enough of her. He slowly eased her T-shirt up.
The second he touched the sides of her breasts he felt her shiver, and he knew then he was lost. He tore his mouth away from hers, kissed her neck, and then moved lower, all the while telling himself to pull away.
He listened to his own warning for a second but then stepped back, lifted her into his arms, and carried her to her bed. His mouth left hers long enough to pull her T-shirt over her head.
'This is crazy,' he whispered.
'Crazy for one night.'
She was nibbling on his earlobe as she tugged his shirt off. The contact of her breasts against his hairy chest made her shiver again. She helped him get out of his jeans.
Cradling her in his arms, he followed her down onto the bed. His hands caressed every inch of her body. She was just as passionate, as giving, and as frantic to please him. She rubbed against him, cuddled him between her thighs. He loved the feel of her soft body pressed so intimately against his own.
He left her long enough to see to their protection and when he was ready, he drew her into his arms and kissed her again, a hot, searing kiss that made her ache to have him inside her.
Her response stunned him. She became a wild woman in his arms, and the sexy sounds she made drove him crazy. All he wanted to do was lose himself in her.
Her legs moved restlessly against his. 'Don't make me wait any longer… please,' she whispered.
He tore his mouth away and buried his face in the crook of her neck, inhaling her wonderful feminine scent as he thrust deep. He growled low with such intense pleasure he thought he would die from it. He heard her cry out, realized he might have hurt her, and went completely still. He could feel her throbbing around him, squeezing him, and damn, if he didn't know better, he would have thought this was her first time. He lifted his head and looked into her eyes, saw passion and tears there, but before he could speak, she closed her eyes and arched up against him.
He could feel the urgency in her. 'Sweetheart, did I hurt you? Did I-'
Her nails gently scored his shoulder blades as she once again arched up against him.
The pleasure she gave him intensified. He slowly withdrew and then thrust inside her again. She increased the pace, demanding more and more of him until they were both mindless to the world around them. Only the two of them existed, and for that short time, there were no problems, no fears, no insecurities.
She reached a shuddering, heart-stopping orgasm before he did. She cried out and squeezed him, forcing his own climax.
Kate couldn't form a thought, couldn't make herself let go of him. She took deep breaths and tried without success to calm her racing heart.
'Ah, Kate,' he whispered. He collapsed on top of her, gri-maced when his left shoulder struck hers, and quickly eased the weight to his right side.
He could hear her ragged breathing and lifted up on one elbow. 'Are you okay?' He looked into her eyes and laughed. 'Damn, you're beautiful.'
Before she could respond he ran his thumb across her lips. 'Can you feel my heart? It's still trying to jump out of my chest.'
Her hand curled around his neck. She leaned up and kissed him, let go of him, and closed her eyes. 'You exhausted me.'
He kissed the bridge of her nose and rolled away from her. It took every ounce of energy he had to get out of bed, but he finally managed it.
Kate heard the bathroom door close behind him. She was still woozy from their lovemaking, but reality was trying to intrude. She rolled to her side, pulled the sheet up, and hugged the pillow to her. She could taste him on her lips. Don't think about it, she told herself. Keep your eyes closed and try to go to sleep.
She tensed when she heard the door open. Light spilled across the bed, but she didn't look behind her. If he thought she was asleep, he would probably just leave. Had he come to his senses, too? Lord, she hoped he didn't regret what had happened.
She heard him yawn, and she felt the mattress give as he got back into bed. She tried to roll over to face him, but he hauled her up against him and kissed the back of her neck.
'Are you asleep?'
His warm, sweet breath tickled her ear. 'Yes.' She gasped then, for he'd just covered her breast with his hand.
'You don't sound like you're asleep.'
She couldn't believe it, but she was actually embarrassed to look at him. 'What are you doing?' she whispered, clutching the pillow tighter as he began to caress her breasts.
