And then he’d remembered.
Normally, Ianto Jones would wake up, swing his legs out of the bed, slope off for a pee and a shower and be out of the flat in twenty minutes. He’d have laid out his suit and shirt the night before, his lunch waiting in a Tupperware box in the fridge. It was order and a system, and he was proud of it.
But that was the old Ianto Jones. The new Ianto Jones sat in bed, wrapped in a duvet, listening to the radio babble away, staring out of the window. He didn’t even have much of a view, but he didn’t really know what else to do. He just watched the barren tops of three trees sway about in the wind like empty flagpoles.
Nearly an hour passed by. He went and stood in the shower, staring at the mirror as it steamed up and hid his new body from view. And he stood there feeling invisible and warm and hidden until he felt guilty about using that much hot water. And then he got out of the shower and dried quickly before the mirror cleared. Then he crawled back into the warmth of the duvet.
He heard the click of the door, and ignored it. He knew it was Jack standing there in his bedroom doorway, looking at him.
Neither of them spoke for a bit. Then Ianto managed, ‘I never gave you a key.’
‘And I never really needed one, but the gesture would have been nice.’
‘Ah well.’ Ianto heard Jack move across the room and felt him settle on the bed next to him.
‘Well, here am I,’ said Jack, ‘in the bedroom of a beautiful, naked Torchwood operative. Anything could happen.’
‘You realise the only word I heard was “beautiful”?’
‘I realise. I’m checking that you’re OK.’
‘What do you think?’
‘I dunno.’ Jack nodded. ‘You never even considered getting somewhere in Grangetown with a view?’
‘There are no views in Grangetown.’
‘Good point.’ Jack leaned in and wrapped a big arm around the duvet and Ianto, drawing them both in. Ianto let himself be folded up, marvelling at how much wet hair he had.
‘I miss you, you know,’ said Jack. Ianto laughed. ‘I miss me.’
‘But you’re still in there.’
‘Am I? It feels less and less like me. This body just gets more and more perfect. I can almost sense it – it hates me. I don’t belong inside it. I’m the wrong soul in the driving seat.’ He looked across at Jack.
‘If the real owner is somewhere out there in your body, she’s not shown up. Nothing.’
‘It’s at times like this,’ sighed Ianto, ‘we need Tosh.’
‘Oh yeah,’ said Jack.
‘Apart from the whole science bit, she had some great jackets.’
‘Oh yeah,’ said Jack. He stood up and reached out his hand. Ianto took it. ‘Come on, Miss Jones. Let’s put on some clothes and face the day.’
EMMA WEBSTER IS PLOTTING REVENGE
It was on Tuesday that Vile Kate finally noticed the change in Emma. It had taken her a day longer than everyone else.
Kate had been in one of Her Meetings. These went on for a long time, were supposedly very difficult, and she pretended she found them A Terrible Chore, while at the same time dropping simpering hints about how Vital she was to the organisation, and how close she was to all the powerful people. When Kate walked in, she was talking to Arwel, the new researcher. ‘Honestly, she put down her Blackberry and gave me a big hug and told me how nice this perfume was. Do you like it? It’s very similar to something Posh wears.’
And then Kate looked at Emma. And noticed her. New, slim, gorgeous, perfect Emma. And her mouth formed a lovely little ‘oh’ and a frown. And for a glorious instant she looked like a sex doll. Emma grinned. Kate snapped on a warm smile. ‘Oh, Emma lovely, look at you! It’s so nice to see you making an effort in the office!’ She turned around to her colleagues with a fond look that said ‘See, everyone, what she can do when she tries!’ and settled down to work.
To Emma’s horror, everyone nodded at that.
What?
Emma’s head flooded with a sudden, delicious view of Vile Kate, sat at her desk, weeping and clutching clumps of hair that had fallen out.
No.
Emma shut her eyes and felt dizzy. She breathed in deeply and then out. And felt the red mist gently float away.
No. I hate her. But I don’t really know her. I don’t want to… maybe later. Is there anything small you can do?
Really? Oh that’s brilliant.
Emma giggled, remembering all the little comments about struggling to bring up bebbies and maintain her figure.
Do it.
Emma smiled warmly and truly. A few minutes later some of the girls asked if she wanted to join them for lunch for the first time in ages. ‘You look really… confident,’ said one. And Emma beamed.
‘So how are you?’ asked Sharon. ‘We’re all dead impressed with your makeover. How are you feeling?’
Emma watched Kate walking over to the salad bar, laughing with one of the Divisional Sales Managers while ostentatiously picking out a few green leaves. ‘Perfect,’ she said.
IANTO TRIES BEIGE
Gwen walked along the wharf, trying to ignore how cold and wet it was. There are mornings when Cardiff Bay looks like Venice Beach, and there are mornings when it looks like Norway. Today was not one of the better ones, and sheets of rain lashed across the decking outside Torchwood. Gwen had already dropped her keys as she locked up the car and, added to that, a mild hangover refused to be ignored. Last night had been a late one, but she’d finally made it to Darren and Sian’s before Rhys drank all the wine. It was surprisingly fun, and the rat almost cute, even though she’d insisted Rhys wash his hands the moment they’d got home. Gawd, when had she drunk so much wine? She tried to clear her head. It felt like she hadn’t slept at all. The weekend seemed a long way away.
She let herself into the Tourist Information entrance to Torchwood and shivered. Despite living in Cardiff for years, Gwen had never bought an umbrella. It always struck her as giving in. Anyway, she hadn’t been allowed them on long nights on police duty, and it seemed silly to get her own when Rhys had a ridiculous golfing one with a daft corporate logo.
It was an odd day. Ianto was late for work. When he finally arrived, he seemed fine, bustling around, very much his old self. But every now and then, Gwen thought she caught a look of utter misery on his face. Plus, he was
