dumbfounded to utter more than a sort of strangled gasp, which everyone seemed to associate, understandably, with the beef.
“Shale is not a wealthy land,” said the count after a short smile of relief, “but we can put our soldiers and this castle at your disposal. On behalf of the three lands I can offer you one thousand silver pieces and a quarter of whatever stolen property you recover if you can put a stop to the raids. We have soldiers enough to meet them in the field, but we need to know
The governor of Verneytha snapped his fingers and gestured brusquely to his military advisor, who placed a bag of coins on the table. The governor pushed it across to Mithos, holding him with his rat eyes. “And for a further two hundred silvers,” he said, very quietly, “you will bring a progress report to my palace in Harvest, two weeks from today.”
“If the count has no objection?. ” said Mithos coolly.
“No,” said Arlest, “though I expect you to keep us informed as a matter of course.”
The duke of Greycoast did mind. He rubbed a pink hand over his red face and wheezed noisily. “I see no reason to pay extra for what we will all learn together,” he said, eyeing Treylen frankly.
“It’s my money,” said Treylen. “My people’s money. My lands are a little more distant. I just want to be sure I am kept properly abreast of all developments.”
He said the last two words looking pointedly at Mithos. Raymon scowled but said nothing.
“Due to the widespread nature of the attacks,” said Mithos, in a businesslike manner, “we will be moving around all three regions. Though the keep is a worthy and secure base for our investigations, we cannot expect to operate solely from here. When we are in Greycoast we will pass on whatever we know. Likewise in Verneytha. If there are major developments, we will ensure that word reaches all of you.”
The duke of Greycoast relaxed slowly, apparently satisfied. Mithos gave him a reassuring smile and closed his hand around the bag of coins that Verneytha had given him. Treylen considered him closely, as if trying to decide whether to demand the return of the money. For whatever reason, he didn’t.
The count, hesitantly, added, “My men are at your service, but you would do well to operate without them until you have the enemy’s identity and whereabouts in your grasp. Frankly, I don’t wish to send them out to be attacked without good reason.”
“Are you suggesting,” said Treylen, “that there is anything to learn about their identity? That they are not simply bandits?”
“Bandits?” scoffed Duke Raymon. “This is an army. How many cavalry units must you lose before you see that this is a tactical war with a careful and deadly enemy?”
Treylen smiled humorlessly and, speaking softly and carefully, said, “Whoever they are, they come from south of the Verneytha border.”
“How dare you!” growled Greycoast, dragging his bulk up from his chair.
“If they are an army,” said Verneytha, still cool, “then they belong to somebody. They aren’t mine.”
“Gentlemen!” said Arlest, rising to his feet with a pained look. “This is not the way. My land is too crippled by poverty and hunger for me to waste time harboring suspicions about my neighbors. We must pool our resources, not squabble amongst ourselves.”
The two men fell silent, resentfully accepting the authority of their host.
“You may need each other more than you know,” said Mithos. “Troops of the Diamond Empire are massing in Stavis. Whether they have some involvement in your recent troubles or not, they may soon show themselves ready to capitalize on them. That weakness can only be increased by your mutual distrust. I hope you will excuse my being so candid.”
That last piece of diplomacy was instigated by a glance from Lisha.
“The Empire has always ignored us,” rumbled Duke Raymon thoughtfully during the ensuing pause. “Why should that change?”
“Perhaps they have noticed your iron foundries and silver mines,” said Edwyn Treylen with a hard-edged smile.
“Or your acres of crops and grazing land,” returned Raymon.
“Whatever the reason,” said the count, “we must bear the possibility in mind. Thank you, Mithos, for bringing it to our attention.”
Mithos nodded slightly and then said, “You have said nothing of assassination attempts indoors like the one we saw today.”
“It has not happened before,” said the count, heavily. “The army of Shale is the most significant force in the area, the military backbone of the three lands, and I am its leader. But why they should choose this moment to strike at me, I cannot guess.”
“The body of the assassin was not identified?”
“No,” said the count. “A cavalryman went missing on maneuvers two weeks ago. It seems to be his armor, though the red cloak and the axlike weapon are the hallmarks of the crimson raiders. The man who used them is completely unknown to us.”
“May we see the body, the cloak, and the weapons?” asked Mithos as he rose to leave. “Unless there is more to discuss?”
That was a joke. I had been sitting there in a kind of stupor, waiting for signs that this nightmare might show signs of improvement, but they apparently couldn’t wait to ride straight into whatever portion of Hell was reserved for the very, very stupid. But there was one more shortcut to self-destruction, and it was Duke Raymon who brought it up.
“While you are investigating, we also expect you to try to reduce the effectiveness of the attacks against us. In four days a major cargo of coal is to arrive by barge in the port of Seaholme in southern Greycoast. The cargo will be loaded onto ten wagons and taken north for the Hopetown market, where it is badly needed. It is both vulnerable and conspicuous. Some or all of you should be there to ensure its safety, though I will, of course, put a sizable force at your command.”
Mithos merely nodded, and the duke looked away, aware that he was asking a hell of a lot.
That was my limit. I finally spoke: “Are you sure there’s nothing else we can do for you? Heal the sick and raise the dead? Move the castle to the other side of the river? I mean, we’ve got a magic sword, so I suppose anything is possible. I’ll have to nip home for my fairy dust, but. ”
“I think,” said Treylen, “that our friend is being sarcastic.”
“That’s the first observation in the last half hour that has made any sense to me,” I remarked.
“Will. ” began Mithos.
“Ten wagons of coal!?” I exploded. “ ‘Vulnerable and conspicuous’ is right! This is a fool’s errand, and I’m not the fool you’re looking for. There are only six of us, or hadn’t you noticed? Six! What difference-?”
I was about to go on, and in detail, when I felt the unmistakable cold of a knife blade pressed hard against the flesh of my groin. Renthrette. Her right arm was resting casually on the table, but her left had slipped under it and pushed her dagger just hard enough to pierce my breeches.
I swallowed hard, shut up, and kept very still. No one else had seen anything and they seemed to be waiting for me to finish my tirade, but I had the sneaking feeling that she had been looking forward to castrating me in the name of party dignity for some time now. I said nothing till the eyes on mine and the fractional insistence of the dagger made me mew out a few words like a startled kitten.
“Well, er. on second thought, it sounds quite reasonable, really. No problem at all. We’ll get right on it.”
When we left them, the count and his wife were still exchanging glances of weariness and bewilderment, sensations that seemed to follow me about. Renthrette never even looked at me, and none of the others seemed to guess what had happened. I kept my mouth shut, having realized in that moment, when my genitals had been hanging in the balance, so to speak, that I was sitting next to a psychopath. Had I breathed a word of this to Orgos or the others, I was pretty bloody sure that if I woke up at all the next day, I’d be greeting the dawn in falsetto.
But the situation was clearly out of control, and while Renthrette could shut me up, she couldn’t change the clarity with which I saw this crimson-cloaked gateway to the underworld. If I was going to get home in one piece, I would have to come up with a new way of playing this adventurer thing, since poking holes in the script didn’t seem to be helping. But, when it comes to acting, I’m nothing if not versatile.
