too lazy to lift the fork to his lips,” he said often. And 22
then he’d laugh in a wheezing manner and I’d wish that 23
he’d fall down the steps and die.
24
I hated everything about Brent. The fact that he talked 25
in a southern Negro dialect made me hate his kind of 26
blackness. I didn’t want to be associated with
had to prove yourself to me if you didn’t speak like an ed-R 28
3rd Pass Pages
ManInMyBasemnt_HCtext3P.qxd 10/24/03 8:16 PM Page 70
Walter Mosley
1
ucated person, a white person. When Ricky came back 2
from Brooklyn, I didn’t like him because I heard the whis-3
pering, muttering southern talk of Brent in his words.
4
Even then, in that room, fourteen years after Brent had 5
died, I was still angry at him.
6
“You stupid fuck,” I said to a memory. “Dumb shit 7
motherfucker. I’ll kill you.”
8
Sometimes I’d spend the whole day walking around the 9
house cursing Brent and all the mean things he said. At 10
odd moments his name would come to my lips with some 11
new curse to level at him. It was like he was still alive and 12
I was in my late teens, forced to care for him after bury-13
ing my own mother.
14
He was bedridden by that time. A nurse came in from 15
social services and Medicare, but I was still expected to 16
feed him and give him some of his drugs. I was never late 17
or forgetful because my mother made me promise before 18
she died that I would take care of him.
19
But that didn’t mean I had to talk. I walked into that 20
room with his tray, sullen and closemouthed. He tried to 21
be friendly, but I couldn’t bring myself to speak. I blamed 22
Brent for everything that ever befell me. My father’s death, 23
my mother’s, the feeling I had that I couldn’t tie my shoes 24
right — all of that I blamed Brent for. Even when he 25
looked pitiful and small, I hated him. The skin on his face 26
was brittle and creased. He resembled the center mask in 27 S
the set — a crack down the forehead to the lips.
28 R
3rd Pass Pages
ManInMyBasemnt_HCtext3P.qxd 10/24/03 8:16 PM Page 71
The Man in My Basement
At night in those last days, I would dream about Brent.
1
