A New Kind of War

unit was its mixture of extreme eccentricity and positively regimental smartness – even little Hewitt was marching stiff and straight ahead of him now, as though on a parade-ground – and that, with an RASC old sweat, was a commentary on Mr Levin’s standards which aroused admiration and incredulity equally.

‘ ’Ere we are!‘ Hewitt presented Captain Audley’s vehicle without a hint of apology. ’It don’t look much.

But it’s what they call in the motor trade “a nice little runner”.‘

What struck Fred first was the question of how Captain Audley ever fitted himself into such a small car; although, to be fair, the fact that it was parked in long summer grass which almost came up to its windows, and between two monstrous ten-tonners which dummy4

diminished it further, belittled it cruelly.

‘It’s what Jerry called “The People’s Car”.’ Driver Hewitt patted the little car’s sloping bonnet through the grass. ‘Before the war Hitler promised ’em they’d all

‘ave one like this – an’ took their money. But uv course

‘e didn’t divvy up – ’e just took their money an‘

scarpered wiv it. An’ what you’ve probably seen is the army version, what they called a “kooblewaggon”, wiv no top to it – ‘ He looked up at Fred ’ – like, it was their Jeep, wot the Yanks give us – ‘ He returned to the car, patting its sloping roof affectionately ’ – but this is the real thing, like a proper car. An‘ Major M’Crocodile sez this is one uv the very first wot they built, the Jerries did – ’ Pat-pat ‘ – wiv a lovely little air-cooled engine in the back, ’orizontally-opposed, what starts up a treat, no matter ‘ow ’ot or ‘ow cold it is ... A little bloody marvel, is what this is ... If you can get inside it, that is: we ’ave to take a shoe-‘orn to get Mister David in it, if there’s anyone in the back there –

wiv ’is knees up under ‘is chin. But ’e likes it, all the same, ‘e does.’

Fred bent down to look inside. ‘He does – ?’

‘But we ain’t takin’ anyone in the back,‘ Driver Hewitt reassured him quickly. That’s Mister David’s – Captain Audley’s – kit in there. An’ yours too – all cleaned an‘

pressed by Trooper Lucy last night, while you were busy –don’t you worry, sir!’ Now he looked Fred up dummy4

and down critically. ‘An’ if we get time, along the road, we can maybe change you up before – ‘ He blinked, the wizened features contorting suddenly ’ –

before we gets to the Schwartzenburg for dinner, like, tonight . . .‘ He looked away, up and down the lines, along which the men who had greeted them earlier were now mounting up, high above them ’– ‘cause we’ve got a long drive ahead uv us, round about... if they ’aven’t repaired that bridge what’s fallen down, by the viaduct at Munchen-what’s-it, on the river there

– ?‘ He came back to Fred. ’If you’d get in then –

right?‘ He opened the car door, pulling it against the tall grass.

There was a curious odour inside the tiny vehicle, like nothing he could put an origin to, which made him sniff interrogatively as he searched for its source.

‘You don’t want to worry about that smell.’ Driver Hewitt got in much more easily behind the wheel.

‘That was from last night, when Otto was making ’is deliveries in it ... I think ‘e may ’ave ‘ad something that was startin’ to go orf a bit, maybe.‘ Hewitt sniffed himself. ’But, then a lot of ‘is meat, it ain’t right until it’s been ’ung a few days – like pheasants an‘ rabbits, an’ such: they ‘ave to be goin’ orf before they’re just right – here we go!‘

The engine whirred somewhere behind them, and fired immediately against the roar of the lorries’ engines, dummy4

and the blue clouds ahead of them.

‘There! What did I say – ?’ Hewitt squirmed in his seat. ‘You little beauty, you!’ He turned to Fred. ‘Got enough room, then – ?’

It was all too much: too much after yesterday, too much after yesterday evening . . . and far, far too much after last night – and even too much after what had been left of last night, running into this morning . . .

which was also too much. ‘Yes.’ Somebody banged on the roof, half an inch from his head. Driver Hewitt shouted unintelligibly in answer, and Fred glimpsed a figure passing on up the line beyond them.

‘Aarrgh!’ Driver Hewitt turned to him again. ‘Good to be movin’ again – that’s what I like! An ‘specially now!’

‘Why especially now!’ The little man’s relief invited the question.

‘We bin up to somethink dodgey – dontcha know?’

Hewitt’s hand rotated the gear-lever in anticipation.

‘Dontcha know – ?’

What Fred knew was that Driver Hewitt knew a lot more than he did, even now. And what he didn’t know he was well-placed to guess at. But he needed leading on, all the same. ‘We’re still in the American Zone, are we?’

‘Too bloody right!’ The lorry ahead shuddered for a dummy4

moment, and then lurched forward. ‘Come on, you bugger – come on!’

That confrmed his suspicions. ‘You’ve been down here before, have you?’

‘Too bloody right!’ Driver Hewitt advanced the little car in the wake of the lorry. ‘We’ve bin all over – up an’ down, in an‘ out – we’ve bin there! Arsk no questions –an’ I’ll tell you no lies . . . that’s where we bin – ‘ A half-grown bush sprang up behind the lorry, and Hewitt swung the wheel to avoid it. ’But now