“I volunteered.” He looked very unhappy.
Rex Ravelle, who had finally recovered from his brief bout with Lysippe, growled, “You’d think those flats back on Earth would have known better than to send a man. Don’t they have any curves they could have given the assignment? You heard what she said. Just like Jerry told you. Go down there and you’ll wind up in some muscle bound mopsy’s harem and she’ll most likely get drunk every Saturday night and come home and beat the bejazus out of you.”
“Very funny, Mister Ravelle,” the captain said.
“You think I was kidding?” Rex muttered, rubbing the side of his swollen face.
Clete said, “What’s the matter with you boys, don’t you believe in marriage? I thought a boy didn’t really feel fulfilled until a warrior took him under her wing.”
Guy Thomas looked at her in agony.
“Easy, Clete,” Lysippe said compassionately. “You’ve embarrassed the poor fella.”
The major came in, Minythyia trailing behind looking resentful.
“All right,” the Amazon officer said. “This is the way it will be. From, your papers, Guy Thomas, you’re a single man well into marriageable age. By Paphlagonian law you are subject to be chosen by any citizen whose gynaeceum includes less than three husbands.”
“You mean I don’t have anything to say about it?”
“Of course you have something to say, Cutey,” Minythyia told him soothingly. “If some old drunken brawler chooses you and you don’t like her, you can always appeal to any other warrior of your choice to take you into her gynaeceum. That is, of course, if she has fewer than three husbands.” She added, smiling encouragingly at him. “I haven’t any at all. Can you kiss the way they do on the Tri-Di shows made on Earth, Cutey?”
“Shut up, Minythyia,” the major rapped. “I’ll explain this.”
“I won’t land!” Guy blurted. He shut his mouth stubbornly.
The Amazon officer sighed. “We’ve got it all figured out,” she said. “Obviously, if your job is going to be done, you’ve not only got to land in Themiscyra but travel about Paphlagonia. And the you’ve got to return to Avalon and Earth to complete the barter deal. We’re not any more interested in your being married by some semi-pervert sex bitch who likes off-beat men such as effeminate types from other planets, than you are.”
“Stop calling me effeminate! Why not just pass a rule that I’m unmarriageable?” Guy demanded desperately.
“I told you. On Amazonia, a law is a law and there are no exceptions. The Goddess Artimis would frown on any attempt to subvert her holy marriage laws. But this is what we’ll do. We’ll seclude you. Clete and Lysippe will guard you.”
“How about me?” Minythyia said.
“Shut up,” the major rapped. “I don’t trust you. I don’t think your patriotism would stand up under the provocation of being in constant proximity to a cute trick like Guy, here—no matter how badly Paphlagonia needs columbium.”
Minythyia’s face was petulant. “I’m just as human as the next warrior.”
Clete chuckled. “That’s prettty damn human, since I’m standing next to you. But I’ve got two men, and they’d probably scratch Guy’s eyes out if I brought him home. Besides, he’s too feminine for me. I like my men soft and willing.” She leered at the Earthling.
“Knock it, you two,” the major said. She looked back at Guy Thomas. “We’ll hide you and we’ll guard you. We’ll keep you away from predatory men-seekers to the extent we can. You want to take the chance?”
Guy Thomas swallowed.
Rex Ravelle chuckled idiotically. The captain glowered at him.
Guy choked out, “I’ve got to. It’s my big chance.”
“All right,” the major snapped decisively. “Remember, stay away from warriors. Stick to the company of the men we’ll quarter you with. Don’t ever go out unless Lysippe and Clete are along to run interference. Themiscyra is man-short since a Lybian raid we had six months ago; half the newly emerged warriors are on the prowl, looking for somebody to keep up their homes.”
Guy Thomas said, an element of plaint in his voice. “I’m missing some things here. What’re Themiscyra and Paphlagonia, and what are Lybians?”
Clete grunted disgust. “Don’t you know anything about Amazonian affairs back on Earth?”
The major summed it up briefly. “Amazonia is divided into two major continents, Pahlagonia and Lybia. Our capital city is Themiscyra, theirs is Chersonesus.” She shrugged under her heavy cloak. “We’re often at peace, but just recently relations are, uh, strained due to the raids they’ve been pulling to capture men.”
Rex said, “Don’t they have their own men?”
The major looked at him as though the question was too silly to bother answering, but then said, “The Goddess allows each warrior three husbands.”
Clete chuckled and said, “The idea is, you have one to take care of the house, one to raise the children, and one—”
“Shut up, Clete,” the major rapped, “you’ll have these boys blushing.” It was two full twenty-four hour periods before Guy Thomas was allowed to land. They had explained to him that they would have to make arrangements for his secretive entry into the land of the Amazons. The government had evidently quickly brushed aside the fact that he was male, although they had been surprised. They wanted Niobium and they wanted it both quickly and badly.
Pat O’Gara had returned with the four Amazons on the first trip, saying goodbye to the officers and such crew members as she had come in contact with during the trip, rather briefly. She had an air of confusion about her.
“Not quite what you expected, eh?” Rex Ravelle grinned.
“Exactly what I expected,” she snapped.
Rex, even as he was shaking hands goodbye with the girl, looked over at Guy Thomas who was sitting, hunched over a cup of coffee, staring blankly before him.
“Hey, Guy,” Rex called. “If worse comes to worse, and some old mopsy tries to get her hooks into you, you can always look up Pat. Throw yourself on her mercy. Maybe she’ll take you into her, what’d’ya call ’em?” The last was directed at Clete, who was standing to one side, waiting for Pat O’Gara to finish her farewells.
“Gynaecum,” Clete said.
Guy Thomas, as though in spite of himself, said, “What’s a gynaecum?”
Rex leered. “I never heard the word before, but ten’ll get you only one it’s the equivalent of a harem.”
“What’s a harem?” Clete demanded.
Rex turned his grin to her. “Back on Earth, in the old days, where a man kept his several wives and his kids in seclusion.”
“Don’t be disgusting,” Clete rapped. Her face was dark and involuntarily her hand dropped to her knife hilt.
Pat O’Gara had flushed. “I’m sure you’ve all got this situation very much confused.”
Guy groaned.
Rex said, “You weren’t around when they gave us the word, Pat, old girl. From what I understand, shortly, you’ll be running up and down the streets yourself, trying to nail any unattached yoke not stute enough to keep himself hidden.” He had to laugh at his own attempt at humor.
Nobody else did.
After Patricia O’Gara and the Amazons had left, the
It made sense, Guy Thomas decided. Obviously, there were some commodities Amazonia needed to import. It wouldn’t have done for them to have fouled up interplanetary trade, with their off again, on again, hostilities.
On the third day the major’s customs launch reappeared bearing not only that officer but Clete and Lysippe as well. They had brought some clothing along with them.
