My Darcy Mutates…

The Dragon Gentleman

What if Mr. Darcy was cursed?

Colonel Elizabeth Bennet surveyed the number of offerings with keen interest. Although her job was well remunerated, she still loved a bargain. She wanted to buy a robotic pet, this time. Since her sister Jane had married and moved out, she felt that her space station was a bit too quiet.

“Eliza!” The high pitch voice of Lt. Colonel Bingley gave her a shudder. “Did you have a good Christmas break?”

“Yes, great. And you, Lieutenant Colonel Bingley?” Elizabeth inquired politely, making a mental note of the fact that Caroline didn’t address her as ‘Colonel,’ as she should. On the other hand, Elizabeth’s sister Jane was now married to Caroline’s brother Charles, making them sisters-in-law.

“Looking for a Christmas bargain? How about this miniature laser gun? It’s cheap enough to be within your budget,” Caroline said with a smirk.

Elizabeth’s lips thinned. The lower-ranking officer came from a wealthy family, and she never let Elizabeth forget that her brother had ‘lowered’ himself to marry Jane.

“I don’t need a gun, off duty.” Elizabeth said, and moved on as a robotic green dragon some ten feet in height caught her fancy.

“What can this dragon do?” Colonel Bennet asked the captain in the sales ring.

“This is Dragon Wickham, made of titanium alloy. It can fly, and it can also arrange laundry or papers, due to its colour differentiation IQ.”

Elizabeth pressed the muzzle of the dragon and it spoke. “Good day, Sir.”

“It’s not very intelligent. It can’t distinguish my gender,” Elizabeth remarked to the captain.

“Maybe because you don’t look like a woman,” Caroline said, intruding upon the conversation. Elizabeth had to admit that her sister-in-law dressed more femininely and provocatively, in leather vest and matching skirt, laced together. The flesh of Caroline’s medically perfected breasts and hips was on display.

Elizabeth was traditional. She had never gone through plastic surgery, and so her body was not in symmetry.

Caroline pressed the muzzle of Dragon Wickham, and it greeted her by saying, “Lovely day, my dear.” She snickered at Elizabeth with a triumphant smile.

“What is your intelligence makeup?” Elizabeth asked the dragon robot, sincerely interested. She wouldn’t allow the annoying Caroline to distract her.

“Sir, I have an IQ of 138. I aim to serve, please and deliver for my master. Would you like a lick job on your tired legs?” Dragon Wickham inquired, and flapped its gigantic green wings as it circled around the two women.

Elizabeth laughed. It had a wicked sense of humour that she found quite charming. After a few more questions, she decided that it’s not very smart but was great fun. She wrote her price down on her iComp, as she intended to bid for it.

Caroline leaned forward and stole a glance at the figure Elizabeth had written, determined to bid for this robotic pet, too.

She was furious that her brother had married Elizabeth’s sister, causing them to be related. Caroline was richer, prettier and taller. The fact that Elizabeth had been made a Colonel at the young age of 20 didn’t necessarily mean that she was smarter than Caroline.

Ever since Colonel Bennet had overtaken Caroline’s rank earlier in the year, the latter had vowed to annoy her, whenever she had a chance. Now, Caroline was determined to buy up everything Elizabeth wanted.

As her rival walked on, Caroline was distracted by some shimmering feathers. The rainbow-coloured headpiece would complement her black leather gear quite well...

Elizabeth was happy she had managed to lose the annoying Caroline. She moved on and was looking at an e-Fan, a computerassisted cooling device, when someone addressed her.

“Colonel, I’m a far better pet dragon than Wickham.” Elizabeth turned to see a small oriental dragon, gold in colour, sitting alone by the corner of the Intelligent Machine section.

“How do you know my rank? You’re not considered a pet dragon anyway,” Elizabeth murmured.

“With an IQ of 300, I’m classified as an Intelligent Machine. But I can be your pet robot.”

This dragon was only about a foot long. Elizabeth thought it look too sad and serious for her liking, but she did like talking with a more intelligent pet, so she didn’t rule it out. At least, not yet. And she liked its deep, smooth voice, as well.

“I knew your ranking because I’m equipped with a scanning device that enabled me to see your uniform and compare it to the information in my database.”

Elizabeth nodded with approval.

“What can you do, then?” she asked.

“Everything Dragon Wickham can do and more.”

Elizabeth was amused by the little dragon’s reply and teased it. “Do you have a personal vendetta against the giant dragon?”

“We were made by the same manufacturer, at around the same time, but he’s always too charming for my tastes.”

“It can serve, please and deliver,” Elizabeth stated, challenging the tiny dragon with its rival’s abilities.

“He’s best able to please his masters with his bright green colour, gigantic size and silver tongue, for those who are into outward appearance,” the little dragon said dismissively.

“And you’re not into that?”

“I’m deeper than that. I promise loyalty, honesty and responsibility to my masters.”

Elizabeth nodded at this further sign of the tiny dragon’s intelligence.

“You look rather lonely,” it observed. “I’m good with heart-to-heart chat, should you feel so inclined.”

She raised her eyebrows. Perhaps it was too smart for her.

“I compared your facial expression to my database, and deduced that you’re smart, decisive, lonely, pretty…”

Her mouth curled up. Definitely too smart.

“Can you fly?” she asked. “You don’t have wings like Dragon Wickham.”

“I’m an oriental dragon. I use the strength of my long tail to fly.”

She looked at it sceptically. It’s so tiny that she’s unsure how it defined a ‘long’ tail.

But the dragon lifted off suddenly and landed on her shoulder. “Pick me, Colonel Bennet. You won’t regret it,” it whispered in her ear, blowing warm air against her earlobe, making her shiver pleasantly.

“What’s your name?” she asked, a bit unsettled by its action.

“Dragon Darcy. And I’m a male dragon.”

She nodded. It – he – was strangely arrogant, but interesting enough, and so she wrote down a figure, half of what she was prepared to pay for Dragon Wickham.

Dragon Darcy then flew back to his stand and gave her a serious gaze.

At the end of the day, Caroline bought the huge Dragon Wickham and brought him back to her space station with a smug grin. Elizabeth shrugged her shoulders, untroubled at being outbid by Caroline.

On reflection, Elizabeth had decided that Dragon Darcy was quite special, and had purchased him. She seldom saw any oriental dragons. Most pet robots were western dragons.

“Welcome to Longbourn.” Elizabeth talked to Darcy.

“It’s comfortable, despite its size.”

She arched her eyebrows, not sure that she should accept such a condescending tone from her pet.

“Let me pack up your sister’s things. You can redecorate the station to your taste,” Darcy said, and flew off to attend to the chore.

“You’re too smart for your own good!” Elizabeth called after him. But she smiled. She and Jane did indeed