My Darcy Mutates…

Netherfield. But you are right, my dear. Matchmaking is my favourite. I know what I shall do.”

With a quick turn, she disappeared, leaving nothing but a puff of white.

Luckily, he could find her anywhere. With a fast swirl of the air and another puff of white, he joined her in another bedroom, where she was perched on a chair beside a bed where a handsome young man lay sleeping.

“George, young Darcy here loves the lively lady staying in the guest chamber, Miss Elizabeth Bennet. Unfortunately, he has the laughable notion that, since she has no connections or money, and has a mother and sisters who are improper, he should not show her any sign of admiration. Shall I make him confess to her?”

“How can you do that? We do not possess the magical power to make the living speak as we want!” Knightley rolled his eyes and shook his head. After so many years of marriage, he still did not understand how his wife could unerringly find all the gossip of the world.

“All things are possible. I can put him and Miss Elizabeth in the same room, and I can turn quite scary every time he does not reveal his true feelings to her. Let me wake him and take him to his heart’s desire.”

Knightley put his hand on her arm. “Wait, Emma. You might well scare them both to death.”

“Well then, if you do not like that plan, I suppose I could strike him on the head every time he does the wrong thing.”

“You will knock him witless then. Do you want to do that to a sensible young man?”

“What would you have me do, then? It is only on this night that I can play at matchmaking for the living,” Emma said, pouting again. But then her face brightened. “I know! I shall simply put him in her bed. I know how much he loves to gaze upon the form of the fair maiden. He will not be able to resist her, when he lies so close beside her. He will simply have to marry her, after tonight!” She clapped her hands, congratulating herself on the brilliant idea.

“How do you know that the young man lusts after this Elizabeth? Did you see more than you should?” It was his turn to fold his arms across his chest, as he was seriously displeased at the idea of his wife looking at another man.

“You know I cannot ‘peek’ into the goings-on of the living when we were in our world. But I listened. He talked in his sleep from time to time; and then I even heard him providing his own relief, once or twice, and crying out Elizabeth’s name in his moment of ecstasy.”

“Emma, you are shameless!”

“I am an old, married woman with several children. I know all about men and their needs.”

“Still! To eavesdrop on a single young man of the living world! It is not the right way to interfere. Do you even know whether the young lady likes him or not? If she does not, you will only create a forced marriage, one for which Miss Bennet certainly will not thank you. Let us leave the living to their lives. We should take a stroll in the moonlight. We have not done that for a long time.” Knightley then pulled her hand to the crook of his arm and took her away from Darcy’s room.

Unknown to the good couple, Frank Churchill had been listening to their conversation. Much like Emma, he also liked to play with the living, but he liked perverse jokes better, and so he decided to do precisely what Knightley had opposed: he lifted Darcy’s sleeping body and transported him to Miss Elizabeth’s room.

How did he know where Miss Elizabeth slept? He eavesdropped on the living, of course, just as Emma liked to do. Life in the dark was boring. He had thought for a moment about whether to deliver this Darcy to Miss Bingley or Mrs. Hurst, but he did not think it would work. The young man would not be aroused by them. He had also considered taking Mr. Darcy to the other Miss Jane Bennet, but reasoned that she might still be too weak to entertain him.

By the time Churchill put Mr. Darcy down to lie besides Miss Elizabeth, he was out of breath. He hated this weakly ghost form of himself. He was no longer a handsome man, and his hair was almost gone. His body was so big that he could hardly see his shoes, and his face was covered with wrinkles. Worst of all, he was no longer aroused by fair maidens, and could no longer accomplish the manly act. Otherwise, he would have loved to trifle with many of the fair maidens who had lived in Netherfield in years past.

Churchill took a look at Miss Elizabeth. She is not as pretty as my Jane was when she was in her bloom. But this gentlewoman has quick wit and a temper. She should be a passionate thing in bed. And I heard her protesting to her sister that she did not like this young man at all. It will be fun to see her response when she awakens to find him in her bed. Ah, but I had best tie her up, or she will scratch his eyes out before he can trifle with her. I shall stick the locks of the main and servant doors, and then she will be unable to escape him! He laughed at his own scheme.

Churchill duly tied the wrists and ankles of the lady to the bedposts, then knocked both Darcy and Elizabeth on the head slightly, and sat back on a chair, intending to watch…

“Frank, where are you?”

The scream of his wife gave him shivers. The pretty, compliant Jane Fairfax he had married so many years ago had turned into a shrew not long after she gave birth to their first daughter. She never recovered her light and pleasing form; worse yet, she started to indulge in drinking. She grew as ugly as a pig, and soon started hitting him when she was drunk. He never thought he would be rendered witless by a mere woman.

“Where are you, old man? I shall skin you alive when I find you!” Her voice was nearer, and he swore at his damn luck. He had hoped to enjoy watching a bit of passionate mating, but now, instead, he had to run. Why can she not leave me alone on this one day of merriment? He stood up immediately and, with a twist of his body and a puff of white, left Elizabeth’s room in great haste.

***

Mr. Darcy felt a slight pain in the back of his head and woke up. Bright moonlight shone onto the bed. This is not my bedchamber in Netherfield, he realized with a shock. The room was similar, but the hangings were in pink, rather than dark brown, And the curtains and furniture were more suited to the tastes of a –

He felt the warmth of a body beside him, and heard a soft moan. He turned around on the bed and, with the help of the moon’s light, saw that it was Miss Elizabeth Bennet lying there. Her eyes were half closed, and she was moving slightly, as if she were about to wake up.

He sucked in a quick breath. What is she doing here? Does she intend to use her arts and allurements to make me forget what I owe to myself and to all my family? How dare she? I thought she was different from the fawning women of the ton. Indeed, I had imagined her to be superior to the likes of Miss Bingley!

A sudden anger surged in his chest. He stripped the bed sheet off her body, intending to send her away immediately…

Darcy’s eyes widened when he saw that she was bound to the bed. Her hands were tied to the bedpost, high above her head, and her legs were pulled apart and bound, as well.  

Did I do that? Did I come here to her room and tie her up? Is this a dream?

Mr. Darcy focused on Elizabeth’s tempting form. He had wanted to admire her figure for many days. She looked very real. Her feet were so small, he could palm them easily. As the hem of her night dress was hiked up, he could see the skin of her legs. They looked as smooth as those of a newborn. Under the thin layer of cloth, he continued his survey. He swallowed hard upon seeing her supple thighs, wide hips and narrow waist. Then his gaze reached her bosom. The creamy globes were hardly contained by the thin green nightgown. They were rising and falling rapidly, dangerously close to pushing the nipples out from their confinement with each upward movement.

Darcy’s arousal came on with full force upon seeing such a lovely vision. He licked his lips. What a dream! I do not want to wake up! He decided to take advantage of it before the tempting vision of Miss Elizabeth disappeared. Lowering his mouth, he pressed a wet kiss to her cleavage. She smells wonderful! A mixture of rose, lavender and maiden sweat! With her hands bound above her, he could not pull the straps of her night dress down her shoulders, and so he set himself to unfastening the tiny buttons that ran down the front of her gown instead. When he had freed a dozen of them, he folded back the halves of the fabric bodice and feasted his eyes on the result. Indeed, he felt like a hungry infant who could not get enough of her. His tongue traced the gorgeous fullness of her breasts with a connoisseur’s reverence. What a vision! Finally, I can devour her as I like.

He was about to lower his head to suckle her rosy nipples when the shaking, tentative voice of Elizabeth made him raise his head. “What… are you doing here?” He could see that she was wide awake now. She wore a