and his views and tastes. One would almost imagine that you fancied that Comrade White was the proprietor of this paper.'
Mr. Wilberfloss stared. B. Henderson Asher stared. Every one stared, except Mr. Jarvis, who, since the readings from the Kid's reminiscences had ceased, had lost interest in the discussion, and was now entertaining the cats with a ball of paper tied to a string.
'Fancied that Mr. White...?' repeated Mr. Wilberfloss. 'I don't follow you. Who is, if he isn't?'
Psmith removed his monocle, polished it thoughtfully, and put it back in its place.
'I am,' he said.
CHAPTER XXIX
THE KNOCK-OUT FOR MR. WARING
'You!' cried Mr. Wilberfloss.
'The same,' said Psmith.
'You!' exclaimed Messrs. Waterman, Asher, and the Reverend Edwin Philpotts.
'On the spot!' said Psmith.
Mr. Wilberfloss groped for a chair and sat down.
'Am I going mad?' he demanded feebly.
'Not so, Comrade Wilberfloss,' said Psmith encouragingly. 'All is well. The cry goes round New York, 'Comrade Wilberfloss is to the good. He does not gibber.''
'Do I understand you to say that you own this paper?'
'I do.'
'Since when?'
'Roughly speaking, about a month.'
Among his audience (still excepting Mr. Jarvis, who was tickling one of the cats and whistling a plaintive melody) there was a tendency toward awkward silence. To start bally-ragging a seeming nonentity and then to discover he is the proprietor of the paper to which you wish to contribute is like kicking an apparently empty hat and finding your rich uncle inside it. Mr. Wilberfloss in particular was disturbed. Editorships of the kind which he aspired to are not easy to get. If he were to be removed from Cosy Moments he would find it hard to place himself anywhere else. Editors, like manuscripts, are rejected from want of space.
'Very early in my connection with this journal,' said Psmith, 'I saw that I was on to a good thing. I had long been convinced that about the nearest approach to the perfect job in this world, where good jobs are so hard to acquire, was to own a paper. All you had to do, once you had secured your paper, was to sit back and watch the other fellows work, and from time to time forward big cheques to the bank. Nothing could be more nicely attuned to the tastes of a Shropshire Psmith. The glimpses I was enabled to get of the workings of this little journal gave me the impression that Comrade White was not attached with any paternal fervour to Cosy Moments. He regarded It, I deduced, not so much as a life-work as in the light of an investment. I assumed that Comrade White had his price, and wrote to my father, who was visiting Carlsbad at the moment, to ascertain what that price might be. He cabled it to me. It was reasonable. Now it so happens that an uncle of mine some years ago left me a considerable number of simoleons, and though I shall not be legally entitled actually to close in on the opulence for a matter of nine months or so, I anticipated that my father would have no objection to staking me to the necessary amount on the security of my little bit of money. My father has spent some time of late hurling me at various professions, and we had agreed some time ago that the Law was to be my long suit. Paper-owning, however, may be combined with being Lord Chancellor, and I knew he would have no objection to my being a Napoleon of the Press on this side. So we closed with Comrade White, and--'
There was a knock at the door, and Master Maloney entered with a card.
'Guy's waiting outside,' he said.
'Mr. Stewart Waring,' read Psmith. 'Comrade Maloney, do you know what Mahomet did when the mountain would not come to him?'
'Search me,' said the office-boy indifferently.
'He went to the mountain. It was a wise thing to do. As a general rule in life you can't beat it. Remember that, Comrade Maloney.'
'Sure,' said Pugsy. 'Shall I send the guy in?'
'Surest thing you know, Comrade Maloney.'
He turned to the assembled company.
'Gentlemen,' he said, 'you know how I hate to have to send you away, but would you mind withdrawing in good order? A somewhat delicate and private interview is in the offing. Comrade Jarvis, we will meet anon. Your services to the paper have been greatly appreciated. If I might drop in some afternoon and inspect the remainder of your zoo--?'
'Any time you're down Groome Street way. Glad.'
'I will make a point of it. Comrade Wilberfloss, would you mind remaining? As editor of this journal, you should be present. If the rest of you would look in about this time to-morrow--Show Mr. Waring in, Comrade Maloney.'
He took a seat.
'We are now, Comrade Wilberfloss,' he said, 'at a crisis in the affairs of this journal, but I fancy we shall win through.'
The door opened, and Pugsy announced Mr. Waring.
