'Hello, Freddie!' and that the door had just opened and closed.
'Eh?' he said.
'Yes?' said the fat man.
'What did you say?'
'I was speaking of--'
'I thought you said, 'Hello, Freddie!''
His companion eyed him indulgently.
'I thought you were dropping off when I looked at you. You've been dreaming. What should I say, 'Hello, Freddie!' for?'
The conundrum was unanswerable. Baxter did not attempt to answer it. But there remained at the back of his mind a quaint idea that he had caught sight, as he woke, of the Honorable Frederick Threepwood, his face warningly contorted, vanishing through the doorway. Yet what could the Honorable Freddie be doing at the Emsworth Arms?
A solution of the difficulty occurred to him: he had dreamed he had seen Freddie and that had suggested the words which, reason pointed out, his companion could hardly have spoken. Even if the Honorable Freddie should enter the room, this fat man, who was apparently a drummer of some kind, would certainly not know who he was, nor would he address him so familiarly.
Yes, that must be the explanation. After all, the quaintest things happened in dreams. Last night, when he had fallen asleep in his chair, he had dreamed that he was sitting in a glass case in the museum, making faces at Lord Emsworth, Mr. Peters, and Beach, the butler, who were trying to steal him, under the impression that he was a scarab of the reign of Cheops of the Fourth Dynasty--a thing he would never have done when awake. Yes; he must certainly have been dreaming.
In the bedroom into which he had dashed to hide himself, on discovering that the dining-room was in possession of the Efficient Baxter, the Honorable Freddie sat on a rickety chair, scowling. He elaborated a favorite dictum of his:
'You can't take a step anywhere without stumbling over that damn feller, Baxter!'
He wondered whether Baxter had seen him. He wondered whether Baxter had recognized him. He wondered whether Baxter had heard R. Jones say, 'Hello, Freddie!'
He wondered, if such should be the case, whether R. Jones' presence of mind and native resource had been equal to explaining away the remark.
CHAPTER VIII
''Put the butter or drippings in a kettle on the range, and when hot add the onions and fry them; add the veal and cook until brown. Add the water, cover closely, and cook very slowly until the meat is tender; then add the seasoning and place the potatoes on top of the meat. Cover and cook until the potatoes are tender, but not falling to pieces.''
'Sure,' said Mr. Peters--'not failing to pieces. That's right. Go on.'
''Then add the cream and cook five minutes longer'' read Ashe.
'Is that all?'
'That's all of that one.'
Mr. Peters settled himself more comfortably in bed.
'Read me the piece where it tells about curried lobster.'
Ashe cleared his throat.
''Curried Lobster,'' he read. ''Materials: Two one-pound lobsters, two teaspoonfuls lemon juice, half a spoonful curry powder, two tablespoonfuls butter, a tablespoonful flour, one cupful scalded milk, one cupful cracker crumbs, half teaspoonful salt, quarter teaspoonful pepper.''
'Go on.'
''Way of Preparing: Cream the butter and flour and add the scalded milk; then add the lemon juice, curry powder, salt and pepper. Remove the lobster meat from the shells and cut into half-inch cubes.''
'Half-inch cubes,' sighed Mr. Peters wistfully. 'Yes?'
''Add the latter to the sauce.''
'You didn't say anything about the latter. Oh, I see; it means the half-inch cubes. Yes?'
''Refill the lobster shells, cover with buttered crumbs, and bake until the crumbs are brown. This will serve six persons.''
'And make them feel an hour afterward as though they had swallowed a live wild cat,' said Mr. Peters ruefully.
'Not necessarily,' said Ashe. 'I could eat two portions of that at this very minute and go off to bed and sleep like a little child.'
Mr. Peters raised himself on his elbow and stared at him. They were in the millionaire's bedroom, the time being one in the morning, and Mr. Peters had expressed a wish that Ashe should read him to sleep. He had voted against Ashe's novel and produced from the recesses of his suitcase a much-thumbed cookbook. He explained that since his digestive misfortunes had come on him he had derived a certain solace from its perusal.
It may be that to some men sorrow's crown of sorrow is remembering happier things; but Mr. Peters had not found that to be the case. In his hour of affliction it soothed him to read of Hungarian Goulash and escaloped brains, and to remember that he, too, the nut-and-grass eater of today, had once dwelt in Arcadia.
