bound to upset their god.'
'Uh-oh,' Joel murmured.
'Uh-oh is right,' Jedidiah replied grimly. 'I'm a fool that it didn't occur to me just how far Ilsensine's senses reached. When it detected us, it sent some of its zombie slaves to bring us to its court. The banelich and Walinda fled in a magic chariot.'
'Did you say those creatures with tentacles were zombies?' Joel asked.
Jedidiah nodded. 'Sort of. They're called grell, and ordinarily they would simply eat us and be done with it, but the ones that attacked us are brain-burned puppets of the illithid god. They're not really undead-they just lack minds of their own. Like the illithids who worship their god, Ilsensine devours the thoughts of others.'
'Is that what's going to happen to us?' Joel asked, understanding now the fear in his god's face.
'I think we're about to find out,' Jedidiah said, nodding at something behind Joel.
The young bard turned around. A male dwarf stood in the doorway. The creature's eyes were as blank as a statue's, and his clothing hung in rags on his nearly skeletal frame.
'Follow,' the dwarf croaked.
Jedidiah picked up his light stone, stood up, and helped Joel to his feet. 'Joel, I need to concentrate on protecting our minds so Ilsensine can't tell what we're thinking,' the older man whispered in his ear. 'You must do the talking. Tell it whatever it takes to get us out of here.'
Together god and priest followed the zombie dwarf through a twisting maze of tunnels until they came to a vast cavern. Over fifty zombie grell and five zombie humans stood guard over a myriad of tunnel entrances that led into the cavern. A strange scent, like vinegar, assaulted Joel's nostrils.
In the center of the cavern was a bed of what appeared to be burning coals, except that the coals glowed not red but green. Acidic vapors rose from the coals, apparently the source of the vinegary smell. Joel was wondering if they were going to be thrown into the fire when the coals began to bubble and rise like bread. In another moment, the coals took on the appearance of a huge brain, the color of polished jade, ten times larger than the brains of the grell. Sections of the brain pulsed and throbbed. Innumerable tentacles hung down from the brain and reached, like roots, into the stone below. Two shorter tentacles waved before the creature's brain body.
The voice that had shouted in Joel's head began to reassert itself, like the droning of a self-absorbed lecturer. He felt an incredible sense of pressure on his brain, as if it were a walnut someone were trying to crack. His skin crawled with a primal instinct. He stood in the presence of a power so great and so evil he didn't need Holly's paladin's sense to detect it.
Then the voice in the bard's head spoke directly to him, and Joel knew then that the green monstrosity before him was the god of the illithids, Ilsensine.
What have you to say for yourselves, thieves?
Joel bowed low before the floating brain. 'Your pardon, great one,' he said, 'Taut we are not thieves.' His voice in the great cavern sounded very small.
You were caught with the stolen property of our people. You are thieves.
'The spelljammer, yes,' Joel said. 'My associates took it from the thieves, and together we brought it to your realm, Lord Ilsensine. In reparation for the damages done to the vessel, please accept the spelljammer helm attached to the vessel. It belonged to the thieves.'
The pressure on Joel's brain increased. He raised his hands to his throbbing temples in a futile effort to massage away the pain.
Your mind cannot remain closed to us forever, the voice declared. We will know if you are lying.
'It is as you say, great lord, but perhaps we can come to some agreement that you will find more satisfying than draining the dregs of our minds,' Joel replied.
We must know who you are, the voice insisted.
'I am Joel, and this is Jedidiah. We are priests of Finder,' Joel replied.
We have never heard of this Finder.
'Thank you very much,' Jedidiah muttered softly, so that only Joel heard him.
'Finder has dominion over the cycle of life and the transformation of arts,' Joel explained, trying to deepen his voice to fill the room. 'He is worshiped by artists and bards seeking to renew their work.'
Now we recall. The slayer of Moander. A demi-power worshiped only in Abeir-Toril. There are so many gods worshiped in that world it's hard to keep track of them all. We wouldn't be surprised to find they have a god there with dominion over the tableware and ale mugs.
Jedidiah chuckled with amusement. The laughter sounded so genuine that Joel would have been hard pressed to say whether his god was truly amused or just humoring Ilsensine. Joel chuckled as well.
If you are not thieves, why did two of your party flee? the voice asked.
'They were priests of Bane, Lord Ilsensine,' Joel explained. 'They stole the ship from the original thieves. We tricked them into flying over your territory.'
There was a momentary silence. Then the god of the illithids said in their heads, Even if you did not steal our people's ship, there is still the question of trespass. No one enters our realm without paying tribute to us.
'We brought you your ship,' Joel pointed out.
You cannot offer what you do not own as tribute.
'What can we offer you, Lord Ilsensine?' Joel asked.
Knowledge is the only power, Ilsensine said. Unless there is some knowledge you possess that we do not, your lives are forfeit.
Joel choked back his anger at the god's injustice and struggled with his fear that he had nothing to offer. He bowed his head modestly. 'My only expertise is music, O great lord.'
Then we will have a song. Something we have never heard before. Come forward so that we might take one from your mind. Be warned, however, that we will not stop until we find one we have not heard before.
Joel swallowed. There had to be something in his repertoire that the god hadn't heard… he hoped. He stepped forward.
'No!' Jedidiah declared, yanking the Rebel Bard back to his side. The incognito god stepped forward. 'With respect, Lord Ilsensine,' he said, 'surely what you seek is not merely new knowledge, but exclusive knowledge. This one'-he nodded at Joel-'is my pupil. There is no song he knows that I do not. I, on the other hand, have many songs in my mind, some as yet unwritten. Take one of those. Then it will be yours and yours alone.'
That would be satisfactory, Ilsensine replied. Come forward.
Jedidiah handed Joel his light stone, then stepped toward Ilsensine. The illithid god raised one of its short tentacles and stroked the older man's forehead. Jedidiah flinched, but whether from fear or pain, Joel could not tell.
Then in an instant the tentacle pulled backward and lashed forward, burying itself inside Jedidiah's head like an arrow. Jedidiah gasped.
Joel shouted and tried to leap to his god's defense, but three zombie grell lashed their tentacles around his arms and legs and held him fast. The young bard struggled furiously, horrified that Jedidiah might be harmed. He shouted for Ilsensine to leave the priest be, to take something from his own mind instead. The illithid god made no reply, but the grell tentacles tightened painfully about his limbs. With a sense of futility and despair, Joel went limp.
After a minute, Ilsensine withdrew the tentacle from Jedidiah's head. To Joel's relief, there seemed to be no wound. On the tip of the tentacle was a smear of pink, like raspberry jam. Ilsensine pulled it back toward its brain and smeared it into a fissure between two throbbing convolutions.
Joel felt a sigh in his mind… Ilsensine's sigh.
Mmmm. That is good. Very good.
Jedidiah collapsed to the floor in a heap.
'What have you done?' Joel cried out, struggling again in the grail's tentacles.
There is no need for alarm. He is not seriously injured. He will recover. We are most pleased. You have earned your freedom. My servants will escort you to the borders of our realm. Where will you be heading?
'The Palace of Judgment,' Joel said, his eyes straining for some sign of movement from Jedidiah.
You will like it there. It is very beautiful. At least, that is what I have tasted in the minds of humans who have visited there.
