My face, never a subtle instrument, betrayed me.
“Oh, my Lord.” Deborah giggled. “You don't think I'm flirting with you, do you?” Her eyes were bright with mirth for the first time since we'd begun this rather sad conversation. I think, sad stories told, we both felt the need for human touch. We took refuge in teasing each other.
I grinned, feeling utterly foolish. “Of course I didn't think that. It's just I'm not quite used to thinking of you as my cousin yet.”
“Hmmm.” Her voice was a lascivious alto. “And what if I wasn't your cousin?”
Okay, we were back on suspiciously come-hither territory-not my comfort zone with lovely women who share common ancestors.
“Then I'm sure we'd be friends,” I ventured. Right answer. She rewarded me with a beautiful smile. Her heavy burden of sadness seemed vanished, at least for a few minutes. “Surely you don't talk this way with Aubrey.”
“Aubrey? No. Aubrey is too wrapped up in his spirituality and holisticness and what all else to show much interest in romance.”
“He's too busy solving everyone else's problems, I guess,” I said.
“Odd that he's that way. He was such a wild boy. Thank God for Aunt Sass's sanity he straightened himself out.”
“Aubrey? Wild?” The description didn't match my prudish cousin.
“Oh, Jordan, I keep forgetting you're not exactly privy to all our soiled family linen.” She drew back slightly and a strand of hair whipped around her face. The shape of her eyes was very much like Bob Don's and for one peculiar moment I wanted to reach out and take her hand and ask, Tell me something I don't know about Bob Don. Tell me something only another Goertz would laugh at. Make me feel like I belong here. I want to know him better than I'm ready to admit. But I didn't speak.
“I don't want to be seen as a gossip,” she said.
I shook my head. “You're right. I don't know these people and I wish I did. Tell me. Tell me whatever you want about them.”
She gazed out again at the sea. “Well, Aubrey's had a tough time. Stepfathers aplenty, none of whom ever gave a rat's ass about him. He turned bad as a kid-or maybe rancid is a better word. He ran away from home when he was fifteen and was gone for two whole years. Sass nearly went out of her mind. He showed up again at her house, skinny as a rail, high on dope, but wanting to come home and clean up his act.” She shook her head. “The men in this family tend to vanish at times. At least Aubrey came back. He never told me what happened to him.”
“You really care about Aubrey, don't you?”
She nodded. “After Brian died-I nearly had a breakdown. It was so hard to lose him, and Aunt Lolly was devastated, even though she'd never been real sweet to either of us. Aubrey took care of me. He was my best friend. Maybe that experience strengthened his interest in helping people. I hated it when he ran out on all of us. I hope you never have anyone you love walk out of your life that way, Jordan. It's God's own pain to deal with.”
I didn't explain to her that I had known that very pain. My best friend Trey, a brother to me, had turned and walked out of my life years ago. He had left his wife and son behind-who also happened to be my sister and my nephew. I had hardly seen my friend again when he died at my feet, bloodied with bullets. There is no way to retrieve that lost time. The thought of Trey-of his death-still stung me.
“Can I ask a tough question, Deborah?”
Deborah nodded.
“Do you know if Bob Don and your father were close?” I asked. I had a sudden, heavy feeling that maybe Bob Don and I shared a sad experience; that of our brothers having turned tail and disappeared from our lives, without a trace. Trey had not been my blood brother, but he'd been the closest substitute I had.
“Close? They hated each other's guts.” Deborah tugged again at her lip. “Brotherly love was not their forte. At least that's what Uncle Mutt told me. I'm sure it was because they both loved Gretchen. But it shouldn't have been that way. They were just two wonderful men who just didn't understand each other.”
“So what was the deal? Gretchen was married to your dad first, they divorced, then Bob Don married her? You've got to admit that's a little weird.”
“Little weird is a phrase that's never done our family justice. The whole dirty story is-” and she was cut off by a scream from the direction of the greenhouse. It sounded horrible, fueled by a man's last breath. Deborah moved faster than I did, sprinting past me and off the porch. I followed. The scream cut off abruptly as I vaulted to the ground.
12
I rushed after Deborah. Another choked scream sounded from near the elaborate greenhouse I'd noticed on our arrival. I saw the deputy look up from her reverie on the beach, and I waved arms at her. She ran toward us. I passed Deborah and broke through the clumps of saltgrass and wildflowers near the greenhouse to find Tom Bedrich kneeling over Aubrey, one hand raised to administer a punch to Aubrey's already bloodied countenance.
“Tom! Stop it!” Deborah hollered. She darted around me and seized Tom's arm.
His lean face contorted in anger and for one moment I feared he'd strike her. I lurched forward and pulled her away.
“He's trying to kill me!” Aubrey bellowed. “For God's sake, get him off me!”
I yanked at Tom's muscled arm; he didn't want to surrender. 'Tom,” I said, keeping my voice even. “Let him go now. It's over.” I tightened my grip and pulled up, just to show I'm stronger and tougher than the garden-variety librarian.
Tom finally stood, shoving Aubrey away as if he were rotting garbage. Aubrey scurried and sat down hard. Deborah knelt by her cousin, critically examining his contusions. She glared up at Tom. “You want to tell us what made y'all come to blows?”
Tom's watery blue eyes didn't waver from Aubrey's face. “No.”
The deputy-I could see BERTHOLD inscribed on her name tag-slowed to a jog, her hand on her holster. “What's the problem here, folks?”
Tom hardly looked at her, staring down at the ground.
Aubrey wiped blood from his nose and muttered something under his breath.
“Well, gentlemen?” The deputy inched closer to Tom.
“It's nothing. Just a family disagreement.”
“Oh, you always throw punches during disagreements?” Ice edged the deputy's voice.
“I'm not hurt,” Aubrey amended. “Look, ma'am, we were horsing around. It just got out of hand…” His voice drifted off and Tom didn't answer.
“You want to press charges against this fellow?” Deputy Berthold jerked her head toward Tom.
Aubrey shook his head. “No. Of course not. It was stupid of us to fight.” A gleam lit his eyes, though, that I didn't believe the deputy could see.
“I don't want to hear about any more trouble.” Berthold frosted us all with her stare. I hadn't even done anything and I felt guilty. “I'll have to report this to Lieutenant Mendez. Anything odd happens here, he hears about it. You two going to behave now?”
Both men nodded, like recalcitrant schoolboys. Berthold fixed them with a baneful eye, turned, and headed toward the house. Twice she looked back to glare.
“Ooooh,” Aubrey muttered, “authority figure. Think she's got a dominatrix set at home?” He grinned at Tom and I saw a thin smear of blood along his teeth. Tom glanced away from his cousin in disgust.
“You know, Tom,” Deborah said, helping Aubrey to his feet, “no one is remotely impressed with this silent he-man crap you've perfected to an art. A very cheap art. What the hell's the matter with you?”
“Nothing,” he answered.
“Aubrey?” I asked. I turned his jaw toward me. He had a busted lip and a cheek guaranteed to bruise up
