this particular thing couldn’t wait.
Another show was on the TV now and I clicked the mute button on the remote. “I want you to know what’s going on,” I said.
“What do you mean?” Shannon looked worried. “What are you talking about? This isn’t about that letter again, is it?”
“Yes, it is,” I said. I told her that Julie had gone down the shore to be interviewed by the police and that she’d stayed in Ethan’s house, next door to our old bungalow. “Both things were hard for her,” I said. “Having to remember everything that happened and being someplace that reminded her of your aunt Isabel. And it looks like the police might need to interview your grandmother, so your mom’s going to need to tell her about the letter and she’s worried about that. About how Nana will react. So she has a lot on her plate right now.”
Shannon studied my face while I spoke, then shook her head slowly. “I wish I had a magic wand to make that whole thing go away,” she said. “Mom should be, like, in intensive therapy or something.”
“She was in therapy when she was a kid,” I said. “And she’s okay,” I assured her. “You don’t need to worry about her.You just need to know that the next few weeks might be hard on her and your grandmother.”
“And you,” Shannon said.
“You know,” I said, and shrugged, “I remember so little of that time that it doesn’t have a big impact on me. I don’t even remember Isabel very well.”
Shannon drew her feet onto the sofa and turned to face me. “Okay,” she began. “Now, I’m honestly not saying this to be self-serving or anything, but doesn’t it seem like a really bad time for me to tell Mom I’m pregnant?”
I nodded. “Yes, it does. But I think you’ll have to do it sooner rather than later.” I took her wrist in my hand. “Come on, sweetie. Don’t let her find out by seeing you in maternity clothes, okay?”
She sighed. She had to know I was right.
“Shannon.” I tightened my hand on her wrist. “I’ve never said anything like this to you before, honey, but if you don’t tell your mother, I’m going to have to.”
She looked at me in disbelief. “All right, I’ll tell her,” she said. “Just not, like, tonight.”
“You have a week,” I said.
“All right.”
We turned back to the TV and Shannon clicked the remote until she found a station with old black-and-white reruns. I didn’t know what show we were watching, but it didn’t matter. My niece moved closer to me on the sofa and leaned her head against my shoulder. I put my arm around her and felt my spirit fill to overflowing with love for her.
“Would you be my labor coach?” she asked.
I was touched, but I knew my answer. “No,” I said. “I’m not labor coach material.You know who to ask.”
She let out a long breath. “I’m scared, Lucy,” she said.
I tightened my arm around her shoulders and kissed the top of her head. “Of giving birth or of telling your mother?” I asked.
“Of the rest of my life,” she said.
CHAPTER 24
Once upon a time, I was a hero.
On a stifling hot day during the last week of July, Lucy and I were lying on our stomachs at the Baby Beach, reading while our mother swam in the bay and Isabel hung out near the lifeguard stand with her friends. Suddenly, Lucy scrambled into a sitting position.
“Something’s wrong,” she said. Lucy had an uncanny way of knowing when anything out of the ordinary was occurring.
“You’re imagining things,” I said, but then I realized she was right. There’d been a shift in the activity on the beach. I could still hear the music from the transistor radios, but the laughter and talking had changed to whispers and shouts. Something was definitely going on.
I sat up, too, and noticed a few women standing at the water’s edge, shading their eyes as they looked out at the bay, and it was a moment before I realized that my mother was one of them. I heard a woman’s voice from somewhere behind me calling “Donnie! Donnie!” I glanced toward the lifeguard stand and saw Ned standing on top of it, looking toward the deep water through his binoculars.
My mother started walking toward us.
“What’s going on, Mom?” I asked, getting to my feet.
“Oh, not much,” she said, “but I think we should go home now. It’s so hot today.”
I could see right through her. Something bad had happened and she was trying to protect Lucy from knowing about it. I had no intention of leaving. I took off for the lifeguard stand at a run.
“Julie!” Mom called after me. “Where are you going? We have to go home.”
“In a minute,” I called over my shoulder.
Ned was still on top of the stand, but now he was crouched down on his haunches talking to a woman. It looked like a private conversation, so I walked behind the stand to where the teenagers stood huddled in a mass. I tugged on Isabel’s arm.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
“A little boy is missing,” she said.
“What do you mean, he’s missing?” I asked. “In the water?”
